life is good
oh my god this is therapeutic.
i always laughed at diaries, but writing in this stupid blog is insanely calming (even if i do feel like an egomaniacal wackjob who thinks my life is interesting enough to blog about--fortunately, i don't advertise this very much. lj is private for me. but i acknowledge that this is on the internet, so if anyone reads this, hi there. what was i talking about? oh right. nothing yet.).
anyways, i miss my devart. it's sad, but i do. i know i'm not going back to it ever (except for when i just logged on a few seconds ago, saw "7,547 deviations; 2,114 messages" and ran screaming. but for me photography kind of died. i don't know why. i love taking pictures, but i just don't get the same kind of joy out of the final shots. maybe that just means i'm on the verge of a creative breakthrough...? doubtful. i haven't been able to write anything halfway decent since forever. (although i did outline a story that seems like it could possibly meet the incredibly high standards i set for myself). it's not just that, though. the internet and computer used to be my haven--i'd come home from school and look at art and read stories. now...i spend maybe 2 hours a week online, half of which i spend streaming pokemon and digimon (the only worthwhile animes) trying to bring back a childhood that has slipped away far too quickly.
oh my god.
i'm a senior in high school.
and technically a college student, now that i've been taking a summer math class at the local jc (a class that i love!).
and i have to start writing college applications yesterday, but how can i tell them who i am when i'm terrified they're going to reject me for being just that? i mean, i have good enough grades and test scores for most colleges, but of course i want to get into the best of the best, and a 4.0 just isn't good enough anymore.
and actually, considering my first choice is caltech, i'm fucked if i don't have good essays
OH MY GOD CALTECH
I VISITED AND
AND
AND
OH MY GOD
it was AMAZING! better than uc berkeley by like a million times. i HAAAAAAAVE to go there.
oh my god
oh my god
oh my god
i mean everything about it is perfect. one of the best astrophysics programs in the world, access to all sorts of lab equipment and research opportunities, a non-demanding athletic program where i can do competitive swimming without freaking out about not having time for classes, decent beaches--both me and my mom are head-over-heels for the school ("head-over-heels," for the record, is an incredibly stupid and nonsensical phrase--shouldn't it be "heels-over-head"?), and i'm even going to build my own particle accelerator to get in (by january, gods help me). anyways, we both love it, "even if it is in the valley" as my orange-county snob of a mother said. being a (silicon) valley kid though, i have no problems with valleys--in fact, the constant comfort of being entireley surrounded by mountains has made me slightly agorophobic. i will never live in a flat place. i'll go crazy.
(and for anyone reading this as "blah blah blah...photography kind of died...blah blah blah...start writing college applications...blah blah blah...capital letters...blah blah blah...build my own particle accelerator..." and did a double take, yes i'm going to build one. or irradiate myself trying. and yes, i'm a major nerd)
BUT ON THE HAPPY SIDE
i got all a's second semester, including 2 ap classes
my act composite score went up a point on a retest (w/ significant jumps in math and science, thank god, LOOK AT ME CALTECH)
my sat 1600 went up 100 points on a retest and my 2400 score went up another 90
i passed the ap english test even though i only took the course for one semester
i'm kicking ass in my precalc class--it'll add to my overall gpa w/ an extra grade point because it's a college class (jc, but whatever) and it gets me into calculus next year a prereq for many of the engineering schools i'm applying to in the fall
and
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
and anyone who took it this year knows it was super hard SO I AM PROUD OF MYSELF
...i'm just writing because i'm trying not to think of food. weight watchers is the easiest diet in the world (i lost 3 lbs my first two weeks) but it does not mix with pms binging at 10 in the morning that sucks up all your points for the day.
okay so i should be researching my accelerator
or working on my essays
or studying for sat/act/subject tests, especially since caltech requires that i take a science subject test (i'll be taking physics, half of which is on waves and electromagnetism and a bunch of grabage not covered in my course--yay!)
oh well
i'm going to san francisco TOMMOROW yay
AND I GOT A NEW PUPPY!
after my amazingly wonderful but very old golden retriever, bogie, died this spring, my brother immediatley wanted a new dog to fill the void, since our pomeranian, rosko, pretty much hates him. my parents finally caved, and we found a dog online we could rescue. unfortunateley, he was in los angeles. but then my mom was awesome and said we could get that dog and roll it up into a college tour of caltech, since pasadena is relativeley close. he's this adorable mutt--the dog rescuer thinks he's part australian shepard,, part border collie, but he looks a little like a german shepard mix to me 'cause of his black-and-brown coloring (but what do i know?). he's so cute and sweet and playful and smart. his name is santino, and it was love at first sight (just like with bogie and roscko--i only believe in love at first sight when it applies to animals). he's such a naughty boy, though. but it's so cute when he and roscko play together--santino is like three or four times rosko's size, and he'll grab roscko's curly little tail and kinda swing him around. it's hysterically funny.
oh, and thanks to that trip down to socal, road trips, for me, will always be singing along to the beatles and eating tootsie pops. (we usually cash in frequent flier miles for short flight/long car drive trips, so i haven't taken a real 6-hour road-trip since i was too little to entertain myself.
elsewhere in jennaland
i'm feeling so good about myself aside from the stress and the pms-induced "i hate myself and everyone and everything around me" feeling BUT THAT SHALL PASS
i mean, i've even come to love my super-curly jewfro hair.
ooh, and i've discovered the light rail, which i have unlimited access to thanks to my youth summer bus pass. i'm addicted to nijiya market in japantown, san jose, and their delicious kombu onigiris! so good.
and...i think that's pretty much everything i'm going to talk about
so, livejournal, this is sadly another long goodbye, because my life is too awesome to need to write about now that i've vented out the few negative things and celebrated all the positive.
oh, excpet since it's summer, i'll be rereading the golden compass (and the subtle knife and the amber spyglass) for like the zillionth time AND I'M EXICTED ABOUT THAT TOO because those are my favorite books. and i hear phillip pullman is working on another sequel, so YAY YAY YAY!
see you later, because i think i smell chinese takeout (of which i will gorge completely and share none--fuck diets! (for tonight))
okay i'm going to watch digimon now. and eat chinese food. nom nom nom
I WANT TO GO TO THE MONTERY BAY AQUARIUM!
later.
:D
i always laughed at diaries, but writing in this stupid blog is insanely calming (even if i do feel like an egomaniacal wackjob who thinks my life is interesting enough to blog about--fortunately, i don't advertise this very much. lj is private for me. but i acknowledge that this is on the internet, so if anyone reads this, hi there. what was i talking about? oh right. nothing yet.).
anyways, i miss my devart. it's sad, but i do. i know i'm not going back to it ever (except for when i just logged on a few seconds ago, saw "7,547 deviations; 2,114 messages" and ran screaming. but for me photography kind of died. i don't know why. i love taking pictures, but i just don't get the same kind of joy out of the final shots. maybe that just means i'm on the verge of a creative breakthrough...? doubtful. i haven't been able to write anything halfway decent since forever. (although i did outline a story that seems like it could possibly meet the incredibly high standards i set for myself). it's not just that, though. the internet and computer used to be my haven--i'd come home from school and look at art and read stories. now...i spend maybe 2 hours a week online, half of which i spend streaming pokemon and digimon (the only worthwhile animes) trying to bring back a childhood that has slipped away far too quickly.
oh my god.
i'm a senior in high school.
and technically a college student, now that i've been taking a summer math class at the local jc (a class that i love!).
and i have to start writing college applications yesterday, but how can i tell them who i am when i'm terrified they're going to reject me for being just that? i mean, i have good enough grades and test scores for most colleges, but of course i want to get into the best of the best, and a 4.0 just isn't good enough anymore.
and actually, considering my first choice is caltech, i'm fucked if i don't have good essays
OH MY GOD CALTECH
I VISITED AND
AND
AND
OH MY GOD
it was AMAZING! better than uc berkeley by like a million times. i HAAAAAAAVE to go there.
oh my god
oh my god
oh my god
i mean everything about it is perfect. one of the best astrophysics programs in the world, access to all sorts of lab equipment and research opportunities, a non-demanding athletic program where i can do competitive swimming without freaking out about not having time for classes, decent beaches--both me and my mom are head-over-heels for the school ("head-over-heels," for the record, is an incredibly stupid and nonsensical phrase--shouldn't it be "heels-over-head"?), and i'm even going to build my own particle accelerator to get in (by january, gods help me). anyways, we both love it, "even if it is in the valley" as my orange-county snob of a mother said. being a (silicon) valley kid though, i have no problems with valleys--in fact, the constant comfort of being entireley surrounded by mountains has made me slightly agorophobic. i will never live in a flat place. i'll go crazy.
(and for anyone reading this as "blah blah blah...photography kind of died...blah blah blah...start writing college applications...blah blah blah...capital letters...blah blah blah...build my own particle accelerator..." and did a double take, yes i'm going to build one. or irradiate myself trying. and yes, i'm a major nerd)
BUT ON THE HAPPY SIDE
i got all a's second semester, including 2 ap classes
my act composite score went up a point on a retest (w/ significant jumps in math and science, thank god, LOOK AT ME CALTECH)
my sat 1600 went up 100 points on a retest and my 2400 score went up another 90
i passed the ap english test even though i only took the course for one semester
i'm kicking ass in my precalc class--it'll add to my overall gpa w/ an extra grade point because it's a college class (jc, but whatever) and it gets me into calculus next year a prereq for many of the engineering schools i'm applying to in the fall
and
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
I GOT A 5 ON THE AP PHYSICS TEST
and anyone who took it this year knows it was super hard SO I AM PROUD OF MYSELF
...i'm just writing because i'm trying not to think of food. weight watchers is the easiest diet in the world (i lost 3 lbs my first two weeks) but it does not mix with pms binging at 10 in the morning that sucks up all your points for the day.
okay so i should be researching my accelerator
or working on my essays
or studying for sat/act/subject tests, especially since caltech requires that i take a science subject test (i'll be taking physics, half of which is on waves and electromagnetism and a bunch of grabage not covered in my course--yay!)
oh well
i'm going to san francisco TOMMOROW yay
AND I GOT A NEW PUPPY!
after my amazingly wonderful but very old golden retriever, bogie, died this spring, my brother immediatley wanted a new dog to fill the void, since our pomeranian, rosko, pretty much hates him. my parents finally caved, and we found a dog online we could rescue. unfortunateley, he was in los angeles. but then my mom was awesome and said we could get that dog and roll it up into a college tour of caltech, since pasadena is relativeley close. he's this adorable mutt--the dog rescuer thinks he's part australian shepard,, part border collie, but he looks a little like a german shepard mix to me 'cause of his black-and-brown coloring (but what do i know?). he's so cute and sweet and playful and smart. his name is santino, and it was love at first sight (just like with bogie and roscko--i only believe in love at first sight when it applies to animals). he's such a naughty boy, though. but it's so cute when he and roscko play together--santino is like three or four times rosko's size, and he'll grab roscko's curly little tail and kinda swing him around. it's hysterically funny.
oh, and thanks to that trip down to socal, road trips, for me, will always be singing along to the beatles and eating tootsie pops. (we usually cash in frequent flier miles for short flight/long car drive trips, so i haven't taken a real 6-hour road-trip since i was too little to entertain myself.
elsewhere in jennaland
i'm feeling so good about myself aside from the stress and the pms-induced "i hate myself and everyone and everything around me" feeling BUT THAT SHALL PASS
i mean, i've even come to love my super-curly jewfro hair.
ooh, and i've discovered the light rail, which i have unlimited access to thanks to my youth summer bus pass. i'm addicted to nijiya market in japantown, san jose, and their delicious kombu onigiris! so good.
and...i think that's pretty much everything i'm going to talk about
so, livejournal, this is sadly another long goodbye, because my life is too awesome to need to write about now that i've vented out the few negative things and celebrated all the positive.
oh, excpet since it's summer, i'll be rereading the golden compass (and the subtle knife and the amber spyglass) for like the zillionth time AND I'M EXICTED ABOUT THAT TOO because those are my favorite books. and i hear phillip pullman is working on another sequel, so YAY YAY YAY!
see you later, because i think i smell chinese takeout (of which i will gorge completely and share none--fuck diets! (for tonight))
okay i'm going to watch digimon now. and eat chinese food. nom nom nom
I WANT TO GO TO THE MONTERY BAY AQUARIUM!
later.
:D