Guitar Horror Story
Originally published at http://www.worldcoast.ca Please leave any comments there.
I was taking my guitar to work to play while I was taking calls. I decided to get a haircut beforehand.
It's -40 celcius outside so I bring the guitar into the salon with me so it doesn't warp. I prop the guitar up in a small alcove and go sit down in a chair. The haircut is going well, I'm flirting with the hair dresser, then I hear a loud sickening *smack*.
"Oh my god, Joyce!" I hear as one of the hairdressers runs to help up the old woman who had just tripped over the carpet and elbow dropped my guitar on the way down. Oh man. My heart dropped. What's a guy to do though?
I kept my cool.
"I hope your instrument is alright." says the hairdresser. We keep chatting, I just brush it off like it was no big deal. We finish up the haircut and I pay. I open the guitar case to take a look and see if it was damaged, nothing on first glance.
"I tripped over your viola!" says the old woman. No you didn't. You clearly hit it on the way down, I saw it happen. I'm not worrying about it since she's missing half a tooth from the fall. "I'd like your address so I can send you my dentist bill, my daughter has a viola!"
I apologize for any inconvenience she may be experiencing and wish her luck with getting her tooth fixed, and leave.
I arrive at work with the guitar, and look at it more closely. A wave of nausea washes over me as I realize yes, in fact the laminate was cracked up on the back, and the binding was loose.
The top three strings were out of tune. Great, the guitar is warped. Just what I was trying to prevent.
I bring the guitar back to the store the next day, take it out of the gig bag and show the salesman the damage, he says he can't do anything for me. I point out the inside cross bars were cracking, and he's like "Oh well that's clearly not from any direct hit. How about if i just trade you for a new one?"
Perfect.
Papa's got a new guitar.
Rest in peace my first guitar, rest in peace.