May 08, 2008 17:56
I don't know what is up with this damn week. but i'm tired of it. both of my animals passed away. work sucks. everything sucks. ya know, i always wondered how people dealt with this kind of stuff, but now....i think i get it. i think i understand why people turn away from god and all that. i'm starting to think that maybe just believing is enough for me. maybe all the miracles that people talk about are crap. sucky stuff happens, but we have to get through it on our own. we make our own lives, and in an instant they can be over. no rhyme or reason. i'm tired of pretending to be someone i'm not. so, just for myself, here's a few things.
i think i'm more agnostic than anything. i believe there is a god, but i believe more in myself and love.
i can't live without my medicine.
aiken is the worst place in the world, in my mind. i hate it here. i would rather be anywhere else.
i don't being around all of my family at the same time, their perceived conceptions of me are wrong, and it makes me feel bad when they are surprised by my actions.
i'm gonna go on leave from work right after my birthday.
i have a few friends that i don't like being around.
i don't understand how people can be content with the boring lives they lead, and seem to have no drive or ambition for more.
don't try to change me.