For the public
Forgetting a lot of what I wanted to write tonight. Haven't written here in a few days, and the images and words have leaked. In theory, they might be floating around like radio waves, might be picked up by wandering saints or incognito devils. I hope not, though. There are reasons for the filters we carry like baggage through our lives. People with damaged filters hurt. The release verbal viruses. If that's the case, mayhaps there are verbal antibodies that we can release. I try to do that, I think, but it can be hard. Antibodies work less and less as the hurt builds up resistance. Experience with pain is sort of hurtful evolution, making the forces we apply to alleviate the hurt impotent. Cynicism, mistrust, and hate build, and the more we hammer against the negative walls of emotion and thought, the more our efforts potentially lose meaning. Soon we're seen as just going through the motions, repeating ourselves. Doesn't matter if we mean it. Man, this is definitely not what I had been thinking about to write tonight. I don't even know exactly what this applies to, it's just where my brain went. Think I'll start another entry on a different track and hope things go better. I'm not feeling bad enough to talk myself into a downward spiral. Nuts to that action. Baker out.