finding the beauty in the forgotten
Haha.. wow it's certainly been a while since i've written on here.
Let's see. I've graduated from college..moved to florida... got a job... got another job, been working on my artwork, and still loving one special person...even though they're 2800ish miles away. It's like this quote i found "if you can't get someone off your mind.. maybe they're supposed to be there". i believe it. if that one person is on your mind when you wake up and when you fall asleep... even when you're not even trying to think of them....maybe they are there for a reason.
I'm not gonna lie... I've been enjoying waking up to sunshine every day... and being able to just go to the beach whenever I want. It's great...i think the back of my car will permanently have sand in it lol.. the only thing is that I hate being away from my friends... it's like this torn feeling all the time. I have paradise... but what's paradise without the people who make you feel more like yourself?
So to compensate for that torn/lost feeling i've had lately I've been working on some pretty cool photography projects... and paintings and such. Been trying to find my inner peace again. Last year I lost a lot of people and it's hard starting this year off without them. It's gonna be hard not seeing Jim when Fran comes to visit... and not having Oma and Opa around for my birthday...or having Oma sing to me... or hearing stories about britt's dad, or matt lamb... or seeing Sharon's face at the store. It's amazing how a rough year like that can really break down a person.. and make them question everything....and make them feel like they're lost... and that they have nothing left.
So i've been taking all my feelings lately and putting it into my artwork. and putting together a portfolio. I've been researching ghost towns in florida and then finding them and photographing... and photographing and photographing. haha . it seems like every day off from work is another photography adventure. But it's strange. when i go to these ghost towns and explore the abandonded houses, i feel at one with myself. Almost like my soul has been abandonded or something. It's like i'm on this soul-searching journey..and i'm finding myself in places that i would have never expected to. In these lonely abandonded houses i've been finding things left behind like broken cribs, and kitchen appliances, curtains tattered from storms... and it's made me think. It's like all those things left behind are parts of me i've lost along the way and I want to get back. And every time I find these things it's like i find a part of myself.. or feel something that i haven't let myself feel.. or never even knew that i felt. It's amazing how these beautiful structures have just been left behind... and forgotten about. which seems to be how i have been feeling lately.... and i think that's why i feel so comfortable there... like there is this quiet understanding.
And i'm hoping that since I am able to find the beauty in these weathered buildings... that maybe some day someone will be able to find the beauty in me.
Let's see. I've graduated from college..moved to florida... got a job... got another job, been working on my artwork, and still loving one special person...even though they're 2800ish miles away. It's like this quote i found "if you can't get someone off your mind.. maybe they're supposed to be there". i believe it. if that one person is on your mind when you wake up and when you fall asleep... even when you're not even trying to think of them....maybe they are there for a reason.
I'm not gonna lie... I've been enjoying waking up to sunshine every day... and being able to just go to the beach whenever I want. It's great...i think the back of my car will permanently have sand in it lol.. the only thing is that I hate being away from my friends... it's like this torn feeling all the time. I have paradise... but what's paradise without the people who make you feel more like yourself?
So to compensate for that torn/lost feeling i've had lately I've been working on some pretty cool photography projects... and paintings and such. Been trying to find my inner peace again. Last year I lost a lot of people and it's hard starting this year off without them. It's gonna be hard not seeing Jim when Fran comes to visit... and not having Oma and Opa around for my birthday...or having Oma sing to me... or hearing stories about britt's dad, or matt lamb... or seeing Sharon's face at the store. It's amazing how a rough year like that can really break down a person.. and make them question everything....and make them feel like they're lost... and that they have nothing left.
So i've been taking all my feelings lately and putting it into my artwork. and putting together a portfolio. I've been researching ghost towns in florida and then finding them and photographing... and photographing and photographing. haha . it seems like every day off from work is another photography adventure. But it's strange. when i go to these ghost towns and explore the abandonded houses, i feel at one with myself. Almost like my soul has been abandonded or something. It's like i'm on this soul-searching journey..and i'm finding myself in places that i would have never expected to. In these lonely abandonded houses i've been finding things left behind like broken cribs, and kitchen appliances, curtains tattered from storms... and it's made me think. It's like all those things left behind are parts of me i've lost along the way and I want to get back. And every time I find these things it's like i find a part of myself.. or feel something that i haven't let myself feel.. or never even knew that i felt. It's amazing how these beautiful structures have just been left behind... and forgotten about. which seems to be how i have been feeling lately.... and i think that's why i feel so comfortable there... like there is this quiet understanding.
And i'm hoping that since I am able to find the beauty in these weathered buildings... that maybe some day someone will be able to find the beauty in me.