Good Friday...bad night
So today is good Friday. The day that we remember the greatest act of mercy, grace, and compassion in the history of this world. Should I not be overjoyed?...
It's been a rough day. I'm not so sure why, just lots of different things. I was really looking forward to our Good Friday service, but when I got there, I found out that I had been volunteered to do the childcare. I am so sick of people taking me for granted and assuming that I am fine with doing the kids church all the time. Yes, I like kids. Yes, I am good with kids...but I need my time to. I need to be in the service sometime. I need my God time. Yes, I can have it at home alone, but I need it with my fellow Christians. My faith has been very weak lately.
So that was one thing, and now I realize that I can't keep up the tradition my brother and I have of watching "The Passion" together on Good Friay, because he isn't here. I miss him so much. I've gone months at a time without seeing Sarah, and a long time without other members of my family. But with Ben, it is so much harder. I just always get along with him more, and I get olong witho other people more when he's home. He's always the peacemaker...and I need that tonight.
So it's just been a hard day. And I am missing Landon alot today. It's ridiculous. Someone said his name, and I honestly started crying. We need to work things out, and it's just so hard right. I really just miss having a best frined here. I never feel like I have anyone to talk to anymore. I have Landon and I have Blythe. But it's so much different when it's only on the phone. There's so little connection. I just need someone to talk to, and I want one of the ones I already have found and already trust. I just need them here!
Okay, enough with the ranting. I feel better. I think my mom and I are going to watch something.
Despite of my bitter attitude, I hope you all (what like 2 of you?) have a fabulous Easter Break, and can truely remember what Jesus did for you. I pray that that will be on your hearts.
God Bless,
Bekah
It's been a rough day. I'm not so sure why, just lots of different things. I was really looking forward to our Good Friday service, but when I got there, I found out that I had been volunteered to do the childcare. I am so sick of people taking me for granted and assuming that I am fine with doing the kids church all the time. Yes, I like kids. Yes, I am good with kids...but I need my time to. I need to be in the service sometime. I need my God time. Yes, I can have it at home alone, but I need it with my fellow Christians. My faith has been very weak lately.
So that was one thing, and now I realize that I can't keep up the tradition my brother and I have of watching "The Passion" together on Good Friay, because he isn't here. I miss him so much. I've gone months at a time without seeing Sarah, and a long time without other members of my family. But with Ben, it is so much harder. I just always get along with him more, and I get olong witho other people more when he's home. He's always the peacemaker...and I need that tonight.
So it's just been a hard day. And I am missing Landon alot today. It's ridiculous. Someone said his name, and I honestly started crying. We need to work things out, and it's just so hard right. I really just miss having a best frined here. I never feel like I have anyone to talk to anymore. I have Landon and I have Blythe. But it's so much different when it's only on the phone. There's so little connection. I just need someone to talk to, and I want one of the ones I already have found and already trust. I just need them here!
Okay, enough with the ranting. I feel better. I think my mom and I are going to watch something.
Despite of my bitter attitude, I hope you all (what like 2 of you?) have a fabulous Easter Break, and can truely remember what Jesus did for you. I pray that that will be on your hearts.
God Bless,
Bekah