dream
I just woke up from a dream in which I went off on someone in church about how poorly the church reacts to mental health issues. I remember saying "you think you have it bad! This person was ill in some way. anyway. "you think you have it bad just try telling someone you have depression or anxiety and see what kind of response you get." I certainly hope I wouldn't be quite as rude as I was in my dream to someone having difficulty or even someone not having difficulty grin, but its true. When mental health issues lead to a struggle with faith we can be looked down upon. The church in general doesn't do a great job with mental health. We are all just supposed to pray about stuff and be all good! For some of us that just doesn't always work or it works but we have do it over and over and over and.... I could write a whole long thing about it but to all of your relief I don't think I'm awake enough. I bet I dreamed that because of my esperience of asking 3 different people for help in church on Sunday and being ignored. It was my dr.'s nurse who finally helped me. I'd never seen her in church before. She asked me how I was doing. I asked her if she really wanted to know or if she was just asking. She responded that she was just asking and I could tell her the real stuff on Monday. That cracked me up! It was a great answer! and for the record I would not have gone off about my medical stuff in church with my dr. or her nurse because I think that's rude. G laughed to and siad she would remember that answer. Therapy this week was extremely helpful. Its so good to have someone uninvolved in my life to bounce things off of. She is a wonderful support. I've decided EMDR rocks my world! Tomoro is my apt where i have to tell the dr. I want general for my procedure. I'm very nervous about that. Medical people intimidate me! PTSD sucks too!! Man this entry is disjointed. Like any of my entries really have good flow or anything. You know, I wish I could go back to sleep! My body would like that. My brain is moving to fast and even if I could slow down its really to late now. I mean I have to leave here at 8:30 for PT. Wonder what I will do today. Last time I went on the treadmill and learned to more stretches. One of them is done on this wierd slanting board. When i come home from therapy i have a couple loads of laundry I must do. Maybe I'll see if the washer is available now. Ok, have a load going should be done at 8:25 so good thing its just towells and sweats that can sit before being put away. Hurray for soon having clean sheets for my bed. Tammany is being very cuddly this morning. She was last night too. Hope she's ok LOL that sounds bad I know, but normally she's only a bit cuddly in the day and evening. Ellie is sleeping on the couch probably wondering why on earth her human is awake at this hour. Did I mention I woke up at quarter to five. After waking for about ten minutes at 1 2 3 and 4. I will be napping this afternoon which won't help get my sleep cycle back on track, but who cares. I think I will lay back down and listen to this book I keep falling asleep too. Maybe since my brain is awake I'll be able to listen to more than ten minutes of it. It is an interesting book. The narrator is just ok, but I'm not sure why its doing that to me.