Culture Shock, Courage, and Too Many "Ands"

[turquoiseflea]

I've been looking at all kinds of volunteering projects lately, especially in Romania. I want to go work in an orphanage, work with little kids, or toddlers, or teach English, or nature conservation. I have no idea if I'm ready for it, which is frustrating. Can you feel totally scared and still be a perfectly adequate volunteer? Or should you wait

Comments

[healthnut22]

I agree with Elizabeth. It's so hard to know what fear or stumbling blocks mean- to proceed, or to not. My best intuitive feeling (and intution is what I work off of the best) is to just keep proceeding and keep your feelers out. If something feels suddenly not right, or you find a new approach and abandom the old, then do that. If everything seems A-OK, you keep going. And that's what usually works for me.

...A coupld months before I started college full time this fall, I registered for a mail-order naturopath course that would offer courses in things like herbs, nutrition, etc. All very good and doable by mail. But then I got to college and began the slow road to what will be a lot of full-rigor science courses, and this to me feels far realer, for more meaningful, and far more important to me than to pursue (right now) the small mail certificate I could receive in subjects I already half know, because this can and will lead to something like medical school or holistic medical school, and that to me will open up nearly every door I could imagine needing. So the moral is, I started by being brave about something i thought I wanted and finally just going ahead and doing it, and then I let that fade over the summer and fall and allowed myself to be "hypocritical" and "not follow through," because what I was doing felt far more appropriate and worthy to me. And I'm happy. You'll find what you need if you keep searching, and believe me, I spent about 4 years searching (that's no joke) for what would allow me to feel happy and content. In somewhat of a cliched fashion and in the way of true wanderlusts, that's searching took me to nearly every state in the U.S., to places like NBTSC, to parties, to medical offices, to people, to pastors, to churches, to camps, and then when I was all done and feeling better and more focused and more settled, I was able to realize I'd been "working" on what I really loved for a huge portion of that time without realizing I'd done that. During the dark time, and searching time, I also did things like shadowing dentists and nurse practitioners without realizing what I was really doing, and I emerged knowing exactly (well, on the good days- that's not to say I don't have my every-other-day of doubt and mistrusting!) what I wanted to do and what I needed to do. When I walked into the science building this fall for the first day of classes, it felt like one of the rightest things in the world, and I rejoiced.

You'll find what you need if you are faithful and open to possibilty, and keep looking and trying. And it'll be great. ;)

Rachel