(no subject)
I feel like I am fifteen again. Not in the since of feeling like a kid. I feel fifteen in all the wrong ways. I think I repeat to myself over and over again a few times a day, "I am strong, I am strong, I am strong." But then here I am, in my room alone, all fucked over in the head. Only being 19, I think I haven been through more than most people my age have. I think I have seen more than I would have liked. But then I have to remind myself everything is happening for a reason and the more I push forward with my life, the better everything else will be. I consider myself positive and can easily roll problems off my shoulders, but the things that hurt me the most are always on my mind. Sometimes you just can't push all your problems away. They are sneaky little bitches. I want so much right now that I can't seem to have. You think I change easily. If you would listen and ask me real questions you would find out that I just find ways to hide from my problems. I think now though, I have found better ways to hide.
I was thinking last night and I wish he would have asked me if I was OK... maybe he would have found out it hurts so bad.
I was thinking last night and I wish he would have asked me if I was OK... maybe he would have found out it hurts so bad.