Pirate Song...
So I was listening to a music stream on live365.com and this came on, giving me a much-needed chuckle:
"The Worst Pirate Song"
by Ceann
If you're a pirate I don't believe it
I don't believe that you are capable of such deeds
If you're a pirate let's see your wallet
And we will see if you are licensed for the seas
Are you capable of swinging from the riggings of a ship?
Or wearing a black do-rag when it really ain't that hip?
I don't think so, I don't think so, at all
CHORUS:
So where's your eye patch?
Where's your peg leg?
If you're a pirate,
Where's your gun?
Where's your booty?
Your sassy parrot?
I can't picture you on a bottle of cheap rum.
'Cause You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world.
You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world,
'Cause you're a girl.
So all you females just put your swords down.
I'm not a fool and I'm not amused.
You've got no hook hand, no secret island,
And pirates never go to the bathroom in twos.
So if this isn't some sort of cheap prank,
Then tell me who exactly walks your plank?
Not me, not me, no, nay, never, not me.
CHORUS
A pirate vessel is not a bedroom,
No walk-in closet, there's no bidet.
There's no pink loofahs hanging in the showers and
Pirates don't worry about what shoes they wear today.
Because everyone knows that pirates just wear black,
They raise a flag of skull and bones when they attack,
Not birds and flowers, not birds and flowers, no way!
CHORUS:
So where's your eye patch?
Where's your peg leg?
If you're a pirate,
Where's your gun?
Where's your booty?
Your sassy parrot?
And by that I don't mean your bitch friend.
'Cause You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world.
You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world,
'Cause you're a girl.
"The Worst Pirate Song"
by Ceann
If you're a pirate I don't believe it
I don't believe that you are capable of such deeds
If you're a pirate let's see your wallet
And we will see if you are licensed for the seas
Are you capable of swinging from the riggings of a ship?
Or wearing a black do-rag when it really ain't that hip?
I don't think so, I don't think so, at all
CHORUS:
So where's your eye patch?
Where's your peg leg?
If you're a pirate,
Where's your gun?
Where's your booty?
Your sassy parrot?
I can't picture you on a bottle of cheap rum.
'Cause You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world.
You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world,
'Cause you're a girl.
So all you females just put your swords down.
I'm not a fool and I'm not amused.
You've got no hook hand, no secret island,
And pirates never go to the bathroom in twos.
So if this isn't some sort of cheap prank,
Then tell me who exactly walks your plank?
Not me, not me, no, nay, never, not me.
CHORUS
A pirate vessel is not a bedroom,
No walk-in closet, there's no bidet.
There's no pink loofahs hanging in the showers and
Pirates don't worry about what shoes they wear today.
Because everyone knows that pirates just wear black,
They raise a flag of skull and bones when they attack,
Not birds and flowers, not birds and flowers, no way!
CHORUS:
So where's your eye patch?
Where's your peg leg?
If you're a pirate,
Where's your gun?
Where's your booty?
Your sassy parrot?
And by that I don't mean your bitch friend.
'Cause You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world.
You're the worst pirate,
The worst pirate in the world,
'Cause you're a girl.