(no subject)
OK, so I'm going to try and cut down on the lengths of these following someone's, urm, constructive criticism. *makes a face*
Or I might just post them all in bits. Anyway. What's new? I've been doing shitloads of listening practice... and I guess maybe I know more than I think I do... I'm getting people to play me pieces of music randomly from any epoch and then see what I can tell them about it and what it's looking increasingly more like is that my aural perception's quite good but I don't have the general knowledge to be able to reference it to specific composers, although I did pretty well tonight, but that was the exception rather than the rule.
Ran into Toby last night. The year 12 I asked to be our drummer on a whim/piss-take who then said yes, and then dropped out of school? I told him we were using a drum machine which for some reason he approved of. I guess he's into drum 'n' bass, or something. I miss Toby. Which got me to thinking.
It was about half 8 at this point. I just wanted to get out of the house... wasn't going anywhere specific... and I found myself wandering aimlessly and getting closer and closer to Fairfield. So I thought, fuck it, and walked the rest of the way there and all round the main site, and a couple of the roads around it. I don't think I've been there for two years. Maybe that isn't massively long but so much has changed, not just since year 11, but since year 7 that I never really noticed because it was happening around me... I mean, for a start they've relocated the entire thing to the new site now so I don't know why the art department windows were open (at half past 8... hmm). There's this massive ... thing... canopy/construction/whatever... where the old French block (i.e. my year 7 tutor room) was before they pulled it down. And the only tree in the triangle has been replaced by that huge metal staircase. Pretty much the first time I used that was to get into my GCSE exams (why were they in the drama studio?). Or... no... did I have year 10 French in there? Anyway.
The footbridge has got massively overgrown but it's still got the same graffiti, maybe slightly augmented. The stoned rabbit, the thing in the helicopter with the questionable blue growth, the anal probe snail... they're all still there (worryingly, those were the 'community art project' bits... the graffiti is far less disturbing, by and large). They've cleaned up Fairfield Road... it doesn't have a disused double bed anymore. The thing is, it was always a DIFFERENT bed each week. You kind of wondered what people got up to. And the hotel on the way up the hill, which I used to walk through with Lewis on the way home every day, that's all boarded up now. And really briefly, I felt like the same thing had happened to me. Like THIS was where I really belonged. But then I realised... I don't "belong" anywhere except with my friends, or family, or whatever. And they're great. And, contrary to part of me dying with that bit of my life, part of the past lives on with this bit of my life. Which is altogether better.
There's one part of the past I'd like to have another go at. But I won't go into that.
All in all... I'm ready to move on. It felt like last night was the seal on that. I've closed all the painful bits up. Now all that's left is to have a fucking ace summer. And we're going to do that, right?
Or I might just post them all in bits. Anyway. What's new? I've been doing shitloads of listening practice... and I guess maybe I know more than I think I do... I'm getting people to play me pieces of music randomly from any epoch and then see what I can tell them about it and what it's looking increasingly more like is that my aural perception's quite good but I don't have the general knowledge to be able to reference it to specific composers, although I did pretty well tonight, but that was the exception rather than the rule.
Ran into Toby last night. The year 12 I asked to be our drummer on a whim/piss-take who then said yes, and then dropped out of school? I told him we were using a drum machine which for some reason he approved of. I guess he's into drum 'n' bass, or something. I miss Toby. Which got me to thinking.
It was about half 8 at this point. I just wanted to get out of the house... wasn't going anywhere specific... and I found myself wandering aimlessly and getting closer and closer to Fairfield. So I thought, fuck it, and walked the rest of the way there and all round the main site, and a couple of the roads around it. I don't think I've been there for two years. Maybe that isn't massively long but so much has changed, not just since year 11, but since year 7 that I never really noticed because it was happening around me... I mean, for a start they've relocated the entire thing to the new site now so I don't know why the art department windows were open (at half past 8... hmm). There's this massive ... thing... canopy/construction/whatever... where the old French block (i.e. my year 7 tutor room) was before they pulled it down. And the only tree in the triangle has been replaced by that huge metal staircase. Pretty much the first time I used that was to get into my GCSE exams (why were they in the drama studio?). Or... no... did I have year 10 French in there? Anyway.
The footbridge has got massively overgrown but it's still got the same graffiti, maybe slightly augmented. The stoned rabbit, the thing in the helicopter with the questionable blue growth, the anal probe snail... they're all still there (worryingly, those were the 'community art project' bits... the graffiti is far less disturbing, by and large). They've cleaned up Fairfield Road... it doesn't have a disused double bed anymore. The thing is, it was always a DIFFERENT bed each week. You kind of wondered what people got up to. And the hotel on the way up the hill, which I used to walk through with Lewis on the way home every day, that's all boarded up now. And really briefly, I felt like the same thing had happened to me. Like THIS was where I really belonged. But then I realised... I don't "belong" anywhere except with my friends, or family, or whatever. And they're great. And, contrary to part of me dying with that bit of my life, part of the past lives on with this bit of my life. Which is altogether better.
There's one part of the past I'd like to have another go at. But I won't go into that.
All in all... I'm ready to move on. It felt like last night was the seal on that. I've closed all the painful bits up. Now all that's left is to have a fucking ace summer. And we're going to do that, right?