[Private//Unhackable]heavenlykunaiDecember 2 2009, 08:19:58 UTC
But I said it so soon, and it didn't help a thing.
Right. It started out fine. He was thankful I was fine with the rooming assignments. I said I was glad because then I got to still feel a part of things. And... I don't even know how it happened, but he was then telling me that because he's a Jounin and we would be soon enough too that we won't stay together. I redirected him to now, and asked him to be more open. Um. The topic of hurt came up, and I pointed out something Hawke said to me about good hurts, and that's where things got weird and tense again, because he decided to get offended or something. Said their perspectives weren't the same.
I told him to be friendlier and more open, especially with me, several different ways, because he kept not getting it or redirecting it. Then he told me to be clear, and was clear that he was pissed, at you and me, for the Lee thing and the conversation on his last thing.
And I stupidly told him that you were being supportive in a way that he hadn't been here. I said you'd be just as supportive of him if he let you, in the same breath, but he ignored that part. So now he's saying he should be reassigned.
[Private//Unhackable]turn_a_blindeyeDecember 2 2009, 08:28:14 UTC
Maybe it will take time. Neji reacts like a wounded animal; he lashes back.
I see. I'm not entirely sure how it soured, but I can imagine, to a degree, he went into it with a grudge and somewhat looking for a fight. Anything you might have said could set him off, and the jounin part sounds like a way for him to withdraw further.
Neji seems to prefer to crawl into his den to lick his wounds when he's hurt. It also sounds like him not being part of Team Gai is more for Neji's benefit than for you. He'd prefer to not think of himself as having people to lose.
We'll just have to see what we can do to draw him out again, hm?
[Private//Unhackable]turn_a_blindeyeDecember 2 2009, 08:40:13 UTC
Perhaps. Each in our own way, though.
Some people bury problems instead of destroying them. Anything buried can be dug up again, sometimes with only a word or a wrong look.
Many before him have ignored it, some just as intelligent as Neji. We're in the business of losing people, here more than ever. Some cope by removing the source of the problem--that is, removing the people before they're lost.
[Private//Unhackable]heavenlykunaiDecember 2 2009, 08:47:05 UTC
...I... But is bringing it up over and over and trying to talk about it any better than hiding it? I'm not getting anywhere. And he's just getting more upset. Unless... How did you know we argued again? Did he maybe try to talk to you? Because then maybe that's good. ...Or it could have been me getting annoyed in the kitchen, too.
I just... I don't think he's entirely in the wrong, because it takes at least two to fight, but I don't know what I'm doing wrong, and he probably doesn't see what he's doing wrong. So maybe that's why we keep going in circles and getting nowhere.
Right. It started out fine. He was thankful I was fine with the rooming assignments. I said I was glad because then I got to still feel a part of things. And... I don't even know how it happened, but he was then telling me that because he's a Jounin and we would be soon enough too that we won't stay together. I redirected him to now, and asked him to be more open. Um. The topic of hurt came up, and I pointed out something Hawke said to me about good hurts, and that's where things got weird and tense again, because he decided to get offended or something. Said their perspectives weren't the same.
I told him to be friendlier and more open, especially with me, several different ways, because he kept not getting it or redirecting it. Then he told me to be clear, and was clear that he was pissed, at you and me, for the Lee thing and the conversation on his last thing.
And I stupidly told him that you were being supportive in a way that he hadn't been here. I said you'd be just as supportive of him if he let you, in the same breath, but he ignored that part. So now he's saying he should be reassigned.
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I see. I'm not entirely sure how it soured, but I can imagine, to a degree, he went into it with a grudge and somewhat looking for a fight. Anything you might have said could set him off, and the jounin part sounds like a way for him to withdraw further.
Neji seems to prefer to crawl into his den to lick his wounds when he's hurt. It also sounds like him not being part of Team Gai is more for Neji's benefit than for you. He'd prefer to not think of himself as having people to lose.
We'll just have to see what we can do to draw him out again, hm?
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He might have. I really thought we had a chance to talk things out and then it devolved again.
No one... no one wants to lose people. Or think about losing people. But he can't ignore that he's part of a team; he's not stupid.
Yes, si-- Kakashi.
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Some people bury problems instead of destroying them. Anything buried can be dug up again, sometimes with only a word or a wrong look.
Many before him have ignored it, some just as intelligent as Neji. We're in the business of losing people, here more than ever. Some cope by removing the source of the problem--that is, removing the people before they're lost.
It solves nothing. It's only a temporary relief.
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I just... I don't think he's entirely in the wrong, because it takes at least two to fight, but I don't know what I'm doing wrong, and he probably doesn't see what he's doing wrong. So maybe that's why we keep going in circles and getting nowhere.
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Probably. Let me see if I can find out his side of the story and maybe we can figure out where you're wrong too. Maybe then we can draw even.
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All right.
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