Friends.....
I have been living in Philadelphia for almost two years now and I really haven’t “made” a new friend yet, I have formed many odd creatures using clay but none I would call a friend. I have meet many people that I do enjoy talking too, mostly co-workers but some of Byrn’s school mates, but we rarely do anything outside of work/school. I think the best way to put it is; I don’t contact any them myself. I’m not sure why this is perhaps it has to do with my age, almost thirty, or my personality, or my inability to put effort toward friendship. It’s not like don’t like doing many things outside of work. I’ve played on different volleyball teams, I just joined a soccer team, and I do tend to visit that many locations but at every one of these activities I know people but never do anything with them outside that activity. I sometimes feel it does have more to do with my personality; I’m not very social, or maybe not likable.
Of course this issue isn’t only a problem with creating new friends I have also lost contact with almost every friend I have had in the past. This is because of my inability to keep in contact with people. Yes every so often I will have email “burst” with one of my old friends but it really doesn’t add up to much other then a single “how are” lines that soon get forgotten. Almost everyone I spoke with on a daily basis is now gone to the past. I still remember times when I believed most of my “friends” really only spoke with me because of connections via other friends. Now even the friends that I once thought would always be around are gone. Time moves forward I guess. Perhaps if I knew how to carry on conversations things might be different who knows. The only places I now find these old friends are moments in CS or a random online post on some “social” network; which I kind of hate.
System out
Of course this issue isn’t only a problem with creating new friends I have also lost contact with almost every friend I have had in the past. This is because of my inability to keep in contact with people. Yes every so often I will have email “burst” with one of my old friends but it really doesn’t add up to much other then a single “how are” lines that soon get forgotten. Almost everyone I spoke with on a daily basis is now gone to the past. I still remember times when I believed most of my “friends” really only spoke with me because of connections via other friends. Now even the friends that I once thought would always be around are gone. Time moves forward I guess. Perhaps if I knew how to carry on conversations things might be different who knows. The only places I now find these old friends are moments in CS or a random online post on some “social” network; which I kind of hate.
System out