(no subject)

[turbo_]

i do not really know what i am doing
or what i am thinking as far as my life is concerned
i owe people so much money
and i am not making it at this job
i have had a few interviews and no callbacks
i sleep when i am not working
or hang out in brooklyn
people get pissed at me for not hanging out
but i am not sure if it is really relaxing
or if it is depression
i do not have feeling about anything
everything is just there and as it is
and it does not matter to me one way or the other
i have known people like this all my life
and wondered why they were that way
but wanted so much compasion to be given to them
now i understand
maybe i am just taking some time for me
screw trying to impress or trying to not cross the line
i am me and i will do what i feel is necassary
now i just need to feel

is it too much to ask to have
1. a job that pays bills
2. someone to fall asleep with

the world could fall to peices
and i would be content with those two things