terrible day
My mental health took a nose dive and I had an anxiety attack yesterday. so I've been a special kind of retarded and I can't type properly.
And today we were rushing to get shit ready to leave for Chicago and I ended up wasting 4.5 hours stuck alone at my parent's house without a phone, running out of time to get things done (the laundry was gonna close, we had NO clean stuff) each minute more maddening than the last. so you know, that was fun on top of generally feeling like crying from worry all day.
plus not enough sleep and haven't eaten all day, the apartment is trashed and I have to clean it up, and I feel like everyone is angry at me for being an anxious depressed fuck who, because of being anxious and depressed, can't articulate well and has extremely unreasonable paranoid thoughts.
Now I'm struggling to get in a good mood so I don't make a Fun weekend really shitty so no pressure or anything.