eh.. life.
why the hell is life so fucking disappointing?? i try to do my best in everything and all that i get in return is bullshit. i've worked my ass off for since october trying to make exceptional grades and i do and what's the only thing my mom can do?? BITCH! bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch!! there's always something wrong that keeps her from being proud of her son. fuck her!! i fucking hate my family. i've realized that they've finally given up on me as parents and siblings.. especially her. she thinks i'm into drugs, partying every fucking chance i get to. she wishes i would go hang out with my "christian" friends who, by the way are such great friends, haven't even tried to communicate with me in any fucking way since like 2 or 3 months ago. my so called "best friend" from ECA got herself a presidential scholarship and didn't even fucking bother to call me or tell me or anything. then i ran into joseph drake at my work and when he left he decided to rudly say "well, have a nice life aaron." as if leaving evangel totally like marked me an "outsider" or the fucking antichrist. my mom does not know how much hell i went through at that school and will never understand how much it affected me. i'm so damn sick and tired of her bringing up my life there, on how i had such good friends, such hgood standards, such good teachers, such good christianness.. i never had any of that.. the only thing different with me now, then when i was at evangel is that i'm making better grades, have cooler friends, am out more, matured more, and i actually am with someone i'm happy with. fuck evangel and all the fakes that go there. fuck my unaccepting, bullshit family!!
last night i got like no sleep, so i'm grouchy and that's partially why i'm venting in this entry. chad and i went to katy's last night, but i got there early because i got out of school early and it was just me and katy and we talked. it was fun, she is nice. then derrick (this boy who i saw naked the first time i ever met him, i was doing the lighting for a nude photoshoot.. don't ask) was there and he used to have this uber huge crush on me. then jacob came by later, and that boy pisses me off so much!! he needs to keep his slutty blue eyes off of my boyfriend!! i mean it, every single time chad and him are the same room he's always checking out chad. i hate it. it was a bit awkward but all-in-all fun. i guess..
life sucks. i miss madison and meg so much. i wish i could be closer friends with alex and i wish my parents didn't hate britt and i wish he parents didn't hate me. life has changed so much this year and it really bothers me. change is fine, but when there's too much change going on i just wanna breakdown and leave everything. it really does suck.
last night i got like no sleep, so i'm grouchy and that's partially why i'm venting in this entry. chad and i went to katy's last night, but i got there early because i got out of school early and it was just me and katy and we talked. it was fun, she is nice. then derrick (this boy who i saw naked the first time i ever met him, i was doing the lighting for a nude photoshoot.. don't ask) was there and he used to have this uber huge crush on me. then jacob came by later, and that boy pisses me off so much!! he needs to keep his slutty blue eyes off of my boyfriend!! i mean it, every single time chad and him are the same room he's always checking out chad. i hate it. it was a bit awkward but all-in-all fun. i guess..
life sucks. i miss madison and meg so much. i wish i could be closer friends with alex and i wish my parents didn't hate britt and i wish he parents didn't hate me. life has changed so much this year and it really bothers me. change is fine, but when there's too much change going on i just wanna breakdown and leave everything. it really does suck.