exam today
had my first exam. i did not know two things. thus was not as bad as i was expecting it to be early this morning as i was driving to mudgee from coolah. after a late night out at coolah with the rugby boys.
tomorrow i conquor or fall (again)to stats170.
i miss my friends. i want to be in sydney! the only ride to sydney that i know of is full. crap.
next exam after stats is german next friday. if i was in syd i would study harder, yes i would. really.
i'm emotionaly exhausted. i'm in no mood for crap. esp the relationship crap that happens around me and threatens to get involved in my life. city people rule b/c they (it seems) to idolise the no bullshit, just enjoy urself relationships. they're still very old-school out here. i'd also forgotten that i'd be ignored. i am a girl. even if i sheer, ride, pig, shoot, smoke, drink and talk with the boys - i'm still ignored on some levels. i've never understood it and i still don't. it makes me furious.
thank god that crap doesn't go on with my syd friends.
my mum also told me never to wear revealing clothes b/c of the old-school menatlity here. u know older women think ur trying to take their husbands, and men/boys think ur an easy slut. it made me feel so ashamed of my body, just like it used to when i was young.
i want to go back to newtown right now! i like my freedom.
when i walked out with my jeans, sneekers and a checked dhirt and cardigan mum said i looked like a feral westy. i give up.
*depressed
i must remember the fun and innocence embodied in the motto 'viva la flirting'
tomorrow i conquor or fall (again)to stats170.
i miss my friends. i want to be in sydney! the only ride to sydney that i know of is full. crap.
next exam after stats is german next friday. if i was in syd i would study harder, yes i would. really.
i'm emotionaly exhausted. i'm in no mood for crap. esp the relationship crap that happens around me and threatens to get involved in my life. city people rule b/c they (it seems) to idolise the no bullshit, just enjoy urself relationships. they're still very old-school out here. i'd also forgotten that i'd be ignored. i am a girl. even if i sheer, ride, pig, shoot, smoke, drink and talk with the boys - i'm still ignored on some levels. i've never understood it and i still don't. it makes me furious.
thank god that crap doesn't go on with my syd friends.
my mum also told me never to wear revealing clothes b/c of the old-school menatlity here. u know older women think ur trying to take their husbands, and men/boys think ur an easy slut. it made me feel so ashamed of my body, just like it used to when i was young.
i want to go back to newtown right now! i like my freedom.
when i walked out with my jeans, sneekers and a checked dhirt and cardigan mum said i looked like a feral westy. i give up.
*depressed
i must remember the fun and innocence embodied in the motto 'viva la flirting'