A-ma
My grandmother passed away today when I was in Melaka. It was a fear that I have always imagined - having to rush back to Singapore from somewhere to say goodbye.
I didn't get to say goodbye. No one did. But I am thankful that it was only Melaka and coming back was not all that difficult. I was back in time to hold her hands and legs one last time, but it was all cold and hard. I touched her face one last time before the coffin was sealed.
I have been preparing my mentally ever since I was in primary school when I was cognizant of the concept of death. When I was living in Hong Kong, I was afraid to receive the call from home. The day has come, a tad earlier than I've expected.
Today I looked at the body of grandmother, strongly believing that her soul is present somewhere, watching the wake. I have come to realized and understand a lot of things that I never did all my life.
I still wish that I would wake up suddenly to realize that it's only a dream. And if that cannot be the case, may I wish I dream of her tonight.