Guilt
well yeah so i dont ever post in here but well i kinda cant stop myself now and from here on this will be a run-on sentence, so yeah im guilty of many sins in my life i dont know what the most profound is for sure... but im pretty sure its my most recent big one and well if you know about it you undoubtibly knew from the subject what this post is about yeah so i feel like shit i havent goten enough sleep this week cause ive been working and then going to bartending class every day and i still cant get what happened out of my head and i feel so guilty about it and all i want to do is say im sorry but i cant do that for multiple reasons but i guess mainly cause im scared and yeah i just feel like a total asshole i really wanted to be friends too but i ruined that for sure and all i want to do is make it right but its no where within my power to do that infact if i even tryed to help in anyway it would make it worse hey theres a first in my life ive finnaly reliezed not to help when i watn to cause i only fuck things up more and im sorry i even hurt suzy through my actions as well and... what can i do its done and over with yet i cant let go i cant stop beating myself up but i dont deserve to stop for what i did was that bad and yes im ashamed of it and i think im more ashamed of the fact that i did enjoy itand i knew the situation and i still proceded and... im sorry