I am very seriously considering changing my legal surname.
My Mom is very seriously disagreeing with my decision.
I could understand, perhaps, if I had no reasons. But I do. I have not seen my father for ten years, and I am suffering from it. I want nothing more to do with him. That surname has bad connotations for me and I want to be rid of them.
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First of all, she has to be incredibly self-absorbed to not see how much it hurts you to be tied down to the man like this. I could maybe, maybe understand her stubbornness if she were still close to him and had concerns about how this would hurt him but as far as I understand this is not the case here. It's not even her own name so it's not like she has any legitimate emotional attachment to it. And that thing about marriage is just a whole bag of weird BS... Because obviously in these decent times under the Rule of Her Majesty Queen Victoria, it's the function of every woman to get married and they must take their husband's name for propriety's sak----oh, wait... :P
My best guess is that this is some desperate reach with a mix of "do as your mother says" power game and some fear that this is your way of showing you're better than her. I don't know. All I know is that she could really use a professional to talk to, y'know?
*hugs and sympathy*
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On the subject of marriage, if I married my current boyfriend, and took his name, my Name would officially be Holly Hurley. Okay, you can stop laughing at how that sounds, now. Fitting that my initials would spell 'HEH.' It's just so. Urgh. Her assumptions about how my life will go infuriate me at times, they really do. I think now I've become older, we've grown further apart. We're two very different people.
BUT EVEN SO! She should let me do this. I'd rather have her blessing than not, because I'm well-mannered like that, but if push comes to shove, she'll just have to live with it. *Nods*
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I think my Mom is warming up to the idea now and I'm researching the processes involved after I have it legally changed, like who has to be informed and how - Not everyone finds a photocopy of a legal document to be enough, it seems ¬_¬ Oh and by the way did the deed poll people mention that the additional legal copies you send off to these people cost an additional £13 for the service plus £1 for every copy? Sheesh. Still, overall it's a very cheap thing, and it's a small price to pay for something so important to me.
I am pretty sure in my decision, but I am going to wait a week or so just to make sure this is the right thing for me. I'm very confident that it is and that it will make me happy, but it's a big scary grown-up decision and I want to make sure it's right **Nods**
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