And if you feel like I feel, sugar...
Okay, so now it's time for a little bit of sappiness, followed by a little bit of irritation.
Though my boyfriend and I attend the same university, he hails from a place approximately 134 miles away, which is over two hours away. So when term time ends, he goes home and I stay here. With both the distance and my work commitments, it's difficult to see one another on a regular basis. He has just returned from visiting relatives in Hong Kong for three weeks, during which time I missed him dearly. Despite still feeling groggy from the flight home and having to readjust to the time difference, he came down to see me just four days from returning to this country.
Naturally, I loved our time together. Three weeks + apart is bad enough, but when the guy was in another country? Hell. When I couldn't hear his voice on the phone, or text him throughout my day and see how he is? Torture. Of course, we managed to chat online, but only when it was late in the evening for him and late in the afternoon for me - Sometimes I would be heading out of the door to work as he'd come online to talk to me. So, I found things tough, being a clingy partner. However, as the days trickled by and his return date came closer and closer, weirdly, time began to go quicker. I had almost gotten used to the idea that he was in a different country, but was comfortable with how things were. I'd accepted things. So, that had gotten easier.
Long story short, I loved seeing him this weekend. But time went by so quickly, and tonight, I drove him to the train station, we enjoyed a coffee before his train, and then I watched him leave.
That part hasn't got any easier.
I remember back when we weren't officially together but-still-doing-everything-a-couple-does-with-extra-emphasis-on-the-doing-part, and I was starting to fall for him. I drove him to the station as he went home for easter, which was for three weeks. I cried then, when he could see me. That sucked, because I didn't really want him to see how 'weak' I was, especially because we weren't properly together but-still-doing-everything-a-couple-does-with-extra-emphasis-on-the-doing-part.
It hurt, too, when he went away for the summer holidays. I didn't feel too bad about that, since I knew when I would be seeing him again - In just a short weeks' time. Still, I sniffled a bit in my car as I drove home.
Today. Sucked.
For the whole hour up to when he left, I didn't realise it, but something about my face was amiss, because he kept asking me what was wrong. I just told him I was going to miss him and didn't want him to go, which was true, but I wasn't so sad I couldn't giggle and joke about Left 4 Dead 2 or L.A. Noire and the guy with the funny-lookin' face.
This time when I watched him go, I was smiling. I shot him nice smiles and stuff through the window. He went, and when the train got out of sight, my eyes welled a bit. Got to the car, the tears came and I sat until they went.
Things worked a bit weirdly in reverse, though. When I went back from his on the train, he looked like he was gonna cry. That made me smile, in a 'you're-making-me-cry-this-isn't-fair' kind of way.
I've kind of forgotten the point of this entry. I guess I'm trying to say it doesn't get any easier to say goodbye, no matter how many times you say it. But I guess when you spend so much time apart, it makes you appreciate the time together all the more.
I did wonder when he went to Hong Kong whether he'd stop liking me. But he made sure to talk to me every day, either by IM or email, telling me what he'd got up to, where he'd been, what he'd seen, what he'd eaten, that he loved me. He told me how many presents for me he'd accumulated, and that his Mom thought they were for at least three of his friends because of the number. And how soon he wanted to see me after he returned earned him many brownie points, too.
Um. I'm blabbering.
... End.