Because crossovers are fun!
Taking a break from my horrible NaNoWriMo! 8D Here~ have a Harry Potter/Death Note crossover crack ficlet. 8D
Maybe Harry would have been more skeptical of the gift had it been covered with pink wrapping paper and a little bow at the top. But as it was, the book had just appeared in his room on his seventeenth birthday- sleek and black and unassuming to the point that Harry couldn't help but be paranoid about it.
There were other birthday gifts as well, of course, but he had spent the longest time examining the book with magical detection devices and foeglasses and such until there really wasn't much of a doubt that the book was just an ordinary muggle notebook.
Probably a sick joke of the Dursleys, Harry had thought at first when he finally gathered the courage to pick up the notebook. Except... he didn't think the Dursleys were smart enough to pull such a joke on him.
A Death Note?
"The human whose name is written in this note shall die."
The list of rules went on when Harry opened the black notebook, it's script choppy and thin, like spiders tap dancing on paper rather than words. In order for the person to die, one must know his or her face... circumstances of death could be written in within six minutes and forty seconds... etc.
No, it really didn't seem like something the Dursleys would give him now. At the very least, they would have had his name at the very top just to prove how much they hated him.
But still... Harry glanced at the notebook speculatively, running a finger up and down the binding of the book. He had seen stranger things than a notebook that could supposedly kill a person, after all. And it hadn't done anything to him yet. Heck, for all intents and purposes, there wasn't an ounce of magic in the notebook.
What the hell. Harry shrugged and picked up a quill from his desk, laying the notebook flat against his lap as he opened to the first blank page. If it was a joke from someone, it couldn't hurt, right? Maybe it was a joke that would make him feel better.
And he started writing.
'Tom Marvolo Riddle (Lord Voldemort) - dies of freak magical accident at 12:30PM July 31st after gathering all of his horcruxes and destroying them due to paranoia of enemies ever finding them. The magical backlash of his death destroys whatever Death Eater compound he is in at the time.'
Feeling strangely satisfied, Harry blew on the ink to ensure dryness. He imagined for a moment the young Tom Riddle in his head, and then Voldemort's snake-like visage. He would give the Dark Lord four hours to find all his own horcruxes and destroy them before he died.
Closing the notebook, Harry ignored the noise coming from the Dursley household downstairs and went back to sleep. He didn't know if Voldemort was even considered human anymore, but didn't quite care. Actually, he didn't believe in the Death Note anyway, but it was nice to think that the war might be over tomorrow anyway. That would be one heck of a birthday gift.
---
Four hours later, exactly thirty minutes after the stroke of noon, a huge explosion rocked the grounds of Little Hangleton as the Riddle Manor burst into flames, due to the Dark Wizard Voldemort all of a sudden deciding that morning that he had a brilliant idea to try and create a potion that would preserve all his Horcruxes so that no one would ever get to them again. He had spent all morning locating and retrieving his horcruxes, and then working on the potion himself (himself! He didn't dare trust anyone else with shards of his soul- look what happened to the piece he entrusted to Lucius Malfoy!) and dropping all the horcruxes into the potion.
Unluckily for him, he had mistaken the powdered asphodel with the powdered bicorn (because he hadn't been paying appropriate attention and someone had mistaken the labels of potions ingredients) and had caused a freak magical accident that destroyed all his gathered horcruxes, killed him, and exploded the manor he was staying at, therefore killing all the Death Eaters in the vicinity.
Even the Daily Prophet sounded extremely skeptical when they reported that the next day.
...stfu. I know it sucks, but I found the concept amusing at the time. And I'm currently enamoured with crossovers. 8D Harry with a Death Note? THE WAR WOULD BE OVER IN NO TIME.
And how about this? Gimme some of the strangest (or guilty pleasure) crossovers that you want to see (of fandoms I know!) and I'll do my best to oblige? XD
Maybe Harry would have been more skeptical of the gift had it been covered with pink wrapping paper and a little bow at the top. But as it was, the book had just appeared in his room on his seventeenth birthday- sleek and black and unassuming to the point that Harry couldn't help but be paranoid about it.
There were other birthday gifts as well, of course, but he had spent the longest time examining the book with magical detection devices and foeglasses and such until there really wasn't much of a doubt that the book was just an ordinary muggle notebook.
Probably a sick joke of the Dursleys, Harry had thought at first when he finally gathered the courage to pick up the notebook. Except... he didn't think the Dursleys were smart enough to pull such a joke on him.
A Death Note?
"The human whose name is written in this note shall die."
The list of rules went on when Harry opened the black notebook, it's script choppy and thin, like spiders tap dancing on paper rather than words. In order for the person to die, one must know his or her face... circumstances of death could be written in within six minutes and forty seconds... etc.
No, it really didn't seem like something the Dursleys would give him now. At the very least, they would have had his name at the very top just to prove how much they hated him.
But still... Harry glanced at the notebook speculatively, running a finger up and down the binding of the book. He had seen stranger things than a notebook that could supposedly kill a person, after all. And it hadn't done anything to him yet. Heck, for all intents and purposes, there wasn't an ounce of magic in the notebook.
What the hell. Harry shrugged and picked up a quill from his desk, laying the notebook flat against his lap as he opened to the first blank page. If it was a joke from someone, it couldn't hurt, right? Maybe it was a joke that would make him feel better.
And he started writing.
'Tom Marvolo Riddle (Lord Voldemort) - dies of freak magical accident at 12:30PM July 31st after gathering all of his horcruxes and destroying them due to paranoia of enemies ever finding them. The magical backlash of his death destroys whatever Death Eater compound he is in at the time.'
Feeling strangely satisfied, Harry blew on the ink to ensure dryness. He imagined for a moment the young Tom Riddle in his head, and then Voldemort's snake-like visage. He would give the Dark Lord four hours to find all his own horcruxes and destroy them before he died.
Closing the notebook, Harry ignored the noise coming from the Dursley household downstairs and went back to sleep. He didn't know if Voldemort was even considered human anymore, but didn't quite care. Actually, he didn't believe in the Death Note anyway, but it was nice to think that the war might be over tomorrow anyway. That would be one heck of a birthday gift.
---
Four hours later, exactly thirty minutes after the stroke of noon, a huge explosion rocked the grounds of Little Hangleton as the Riddle Manor burst into flames, due to the Dark Wizard Voldemort all of a sudden deciding that morning that he had a brilliant idea to try and create a potion that would preserve all his Horcruxes so that no one would ever get to them again. He had spent all morning locating and retrieving his horcruxes, and then working on the potion himself (himself! He didn't dare trust anyone else with shards of his soul- look what happened to the piece he entrusted to Lucius Malfoy!) and dropping all the horcruxes into the potion.
Unluckily for him, he had mistaken the powdered asphodel with the powdered bicorn (because he hadn't been paying appropriate attention and someone had mistaken the labels of potions ingredients) and had caused a freak magical accident that destroyed all his gathered horcruxes, killed him, and exploded the manor he was staying at, therefore killing all the Death Eaters in the vicinity.
Even the Daily Prophet sounded extremely skeptical when they reported that the next day.
...stfu. I know it sucks, but I found the concept amusing at the time. And I'm currently enamoured with crossovers. 8D Harry with a Death Note? THE WAR WOULD BE OVER IN NO TIME.
And how about this? Gimme some of the strangest (or guilty pleasure) crossovers that you want to see (of fandoms I know!) and I'll do my best to oblige? XD