an update, of sorts
the message on fb made me look through my old posts again and realize just how long i've had this thing. huh.
it's 2015 and in a month i turn 20. i've had this journal since 2008, damn
i'll post about a few things that have been happening with me lately, since i haven't done that in a long time, so:
- i go to university in san francisco right now! i'm a media studies major and chinese studies minor, and i am currently in hell bc of the workload but it could be worse, honestly.
- i also work on campus now. it's weird saying that i have a job now, doing said job, and getting a paycheck every two weeks, but with how expensive living here is and that i'm paying off my tuition, it makes sense so whatever.
- my anxiety got really bad this school year? i had a really bad panic attack in january that landed me in the ER so i'm still working on that. i've begun talking to a counselor on campus, looking into a psychiatrist, managing my anxiety through friends and journaling, and actually going to the doctor if i don't feel good. it's a slow process and one that feels unlikely to work about 90% of the time but. some days are better than others.
- i'm trying to study abroad next year! i was originally planning on going for a whole year to two countries, but my anxiety kind of makes me more worried about it, so i'll probably only go for a semester, depending on which program is best for me. i'm applying for one in seoul, south korea, one in shanghai, china, and the other in beijing, china. we'll see how it goes.
- over the past few years i've also been learning a lot about what i truly like and feel comfortable with myself. i'm out as queer here in sf and with some of my sisters, but not everyone.
that's all i can really think of right now. i'm kind of out on my own out here in sf, and it's mildly terrifying, but i've been here for a year and a half already, so. i can write and speak mandarin now, talk at length about different parts of media culture and social justice, and will no longer be a teen in a month. this...is weird.
it's 2015 and in a month i turn 20. i've had this journal since 2008, damn
i'll post about a few things that have been happening with me lately, since i haven't done that in a long time, so:
- i go to university in san francisco right now! i'm a media studies major and chinese studies minor, and i am currently in hell bc of the workload but it could be worse, honestly.
- i also work on campus now. it's weird saying that i have a job now, doing said job, and getting a paycheck every two weeks, but with how expensive living here is and that i'm paying off my tuition, it makes sense so whatever.
- my anxiety got really bad this school year? i had a really bad panic attack in january that landed me in the ER so i'm still working on that. i've begun talking to a counselor on campus, looking into a psychiatrist, managing my anxiety through friends and journaling, and actually going to the doctor if i don't feel good. it's a slow process and one that feels unlikely to work about 90% of the time but. some days are better than others.
- i'm trying to study abroad next year! i was originally planning on going for a whole year to two countries, but my anxiety kind of makes me more worried about it, so i'll probably only go for a semester, depending on which program is best for me. i'm applying for one in seoul, south korea, one in shanghai, china, and the other in beijing, china. we'll see how it goes.
- over the past few years i've also been learning a lot about what i truly like and feel comfortable with myself. i'm out as queer here in sf and with some of my sisters, but not everyone.
that's all i can really think of right now. i'm kind of out on my own out here in sf, and it's mildly terrifying, but i've been here for a year and a half already, so. i can write and speak mandarin now, talk at length about different parts of media culture and social justice, and will no longer be a teen in a month. this...is weird.