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Second Fill: I'm Always Right (4/?)

[slasher48]

“I appreciate your honesty, Wardo…but I would appreciate it more if you just left now.”

And Eduardo doesn’t know why he says it, then, but he feels like someday when they look back on this conversation, Mark shouldn’t wonder if he was lying, if it was just Mark that he couldn’t be attracted to.

“I don’t want to leave, Mark. I don’t want to do that to you, because I admire you a lot, I do. I care for you, and not just in the literal sense,” he snorts at his own joke, trying for levity. Dustin would be better at it, but he would never let Dustin know what Mark’s just said, never hurt or betray Mark that way.

“I care for you,” he repeats, “and I want you to know things aren’t going to change between us after this, okay? We’ll still be best friends and I’ll still treat you the same.”

Mark’s breath hitches, and Eduardo considers what he’s said, thinking it over and clenching his fist to stop from smacking his hand over his eyes. He treats Mark so much like a significant other sometimes; perhaps things should change, evolve into a more platonic relationship, for Mark’s sake.

“I’m not gay, though.” He says it to make sure they both know it, to make sure that he’s not just agreeing with Mark to agree with Mark - to shut him up. He knows Mark thinks that sometimes, that he says Mark is right even if he isn’t, just to cut off his curt diatribes, about coding and his sisters and people in general that annoy him (by which he means most of the world’s population), and this can’t be one of those times. This is something he needs to walk away knowing Mark is sure of.

“I know you didn’t want to be, but you’re right about that.”

Mark mumbles something he can’t hear; he might as well be talking to his computer, because his voice doesn’t carry far enough for anything or anyone else to understand him. Eduardo shakes his head, a little annoyed that even though Mark loves him, he can’t even speak to his face.