[PART FOUR] CLOSED
THE SOCIAL NETWORK KINK MEME
ASK THE MODS * FAQ * DISCUSSION * RESEARCH * FILL LIST * PART ONE * PART ONE (OVERFLOW) * PART TWO * PART TWO (OVERFLOW) * PART THREE * (PART THREE (OVERFLOW)
GENERAL RULES;
IMPORTANT: please DO NOT post prompts about any non-public people as part of a prompt. for example: randi zuckerberg is fine ( Read more... )
ASK THE MODS * FAQ * DISCUSSION * RESEARCH * FILL LIST * PART ONE * PART ONE (OVERFLOW) * PART TWO * PART TWO (OVERFLOW) * PART THREE * (PART THREE (OVERFLOW)
GENERAL RULES;
IMPORTANT: please DO NOT post prompts about any non-public people as part of a prompt. for example: randi zuckerberg is fine ( Read more... )
Eduardo nodded, “I didn’t call you for a social visit.”
Dustin rolled his eyes, Mark’s lawyer, Sy had called ten minutes ago and demanded to know when and if Mark got back or else he was calling the cops and having Eduardo arrested.
“Are you crazy?!”
“She fell asleep and they would have just left her there.”
Eduardo put her down in the couch, and Dustin went to go fetch him a drink for his troubles.
“Mark still sleeps through it all, I’m impressed. A nuclear bomb could go off and she’d still sleep through it,” he said with wonder as Dustin handed him a soda knowing that Eduardo had drove there.
“I’m amazed you even got here without her lawyers calling the cops. Chris is going to flip when he finds out, and I’ll be in trouble for assisting,” Dustin said but at the same time his tone suggested he was mildly amused by this instead of worried or disturbed.
Eduardo shrugged and leaned back on the couch, “Couldn’t leave her there and she was asleep so I had nothing to yell or be mad at.”
Dustin laughed and shook his head taking a sip out of a beer, “You can only be mad at her when she’s awake?”
“Hard to want to strangle anyone when they can’t talk back or defend themselves with their self-righteous attitudes when really they’re just being a dick.”
It was almost comical or tragically sad, Dustin could never decide. Eduardo would later carry her to her room and Mark the next day didn’t even bother to ask how she got home or whom took her back. If she knew anything, she never gave any indication. He would watch her day in and day out until the day the lawsuit ended, until he got his own apartment. Eduardo would never come back to any place they were, sometimes he would text or email or call but it was the last time Dustin had seen Eduardo face to face. And somehow like always, it was when he was taking care of Mark.
The irony and tragedy of it all was never lost on him.
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Mark looked down at the bowl of pasta that Eduardo had made for her, “Oh student lounge?”
Eduardo nodded, “You barely leave this place anymore and the dining hall was closed.”
Mark shrugged and went back to coding, the corner of her lips however were poised upward in what dangerously looked close to a smile at the idea that Eduardo had made her dinner.
“How’s it going?”
“We should be live soon but if you want me to go to sleep later…”
“Right, got it. I’ll go find Chris and do some studying.”
-
(Present)
“Why is there food in my ‘fridge?” Mark demanded with her arms crossed over her chest.
“Uh… I have no idea,” Dustin lied.
Mark knew better, Dustin had the only other key, the employee responsible used his key to get in her house.
“I don’t shop for food. Somehow it got here.”
Dustin shrugged and kept playing on the xbox. He would never tell that it was Eduardo that had dropped it off and made it for her. In fact, Dustin enjoyed keeping those things to himself because in theory Eduardo was still mad at Mark and Mark was still- well he didn’t know, he didn’t speak girl but something resembling lasting PMS.
“Hey Dustin…”
Dustin looked up, “How did I get back home last night?” Mark asked.
Dustin just went back to the video game. He had lost his best friends over her, Dustin had chosen to lie in his own bed of shit but that didn’t mean he wasn’t partially mad at Mark either. If she still didn’t get it, he wasn’t going to be the one to help her out. She deserved Eduardo’s anger, and her confusion was just an added bonus. He felt sorry for Eduardo but he too was also made at him because Eduardo didn’t pick his friends over his wannabe girlfriend. He wouldn’t come visit or hang with Dustin because he picked Mark over him and then got screwed and now it was Dustin was enemy number two. And then Chris decided to stay at Harvard. Yea, he wasn’t about to be helpful, spiteful maybe but honest.
He would probably regret it someday but that day wasn’t today.
-
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Mark wanted to document this moment in time with photographic and video proof on the web. Then she wanted to mock him forever.
Though why he was speechless was something that was making her curious and thus she was forced to forgo the humor and embarrassment for some actual answers.
“What are you looking at like that?” she demanded crossing her arms.
Eduardo promptly hit Mark on the hand, “Don’t move, you move, I mess up.”
Mark sighed and put her hands back at her sides but her glare on Sean hadn’t eased up any. Eduardo was in the middle of trying to braid Mark’s hair, after Mark complained that her hair kept getting in the way of the computer screen and she was trying to code. She might have actually yelled at her hair when Eduardo rolled his eyes and started messing with it.
He was almost halfway done at this point and Sean who had just come back from finding more investors was a little surprised by the scene. Of Eduardo braidings Mark hair like it was normal everyday natural thing for any guy to do. Sean almost wanted to pat him on the back and say ‘I’m sorry you’re longer a man, I revoke your man card.’
Except this shit was funny well it was until Mark started glaring at him. That seemly came out of nowhere.
Finally Sean started laughing which caused both of them to glare at him, “Hey Ward-a is Mark’s whip and your bra around here somewhere?”
-
(18 months post deposition)
Mark had settled for half a million dollars, some stock, and a promise that Eduardo never speak of her and Facebook again. Sy assured her that she won, Mark wasn’t sure that was true. Eduardo might have gotten more if he hadn’t apparently tried to kidnap her or at least that’s her lawyers painted it.
Mark almost wanted to cry in the bathroom when she found that he had actually brought her home, she tried to thank him but for her efforts she was met with silence and a warning finger saying to back off or else.
After the tragic ending, Mark was sure the worst of it was over but then those rowing dicks struck with their own lawsuit that brought them money too. Mark felt like she had lost that one too because if she had her way, not only would they have not gotten paid, but their dicks would have been mounted on her wall.
Okay, so she was a little bitter.
Though that wasn’t even the real drama, the major issue of the Facebook troubles happened thanks to Sean Parker. The same Sean Parker she had stuck her neck out for, defended against Eduardo in accusations of being a coke head, a jerk, a lair, and a slime ball. All of which she had now blown up in her face big time.
Sean Parker was the enemy which he knew.
One would have thought, Sean would have wisely backed off instead Sean deciding he was still a shareholder and he wanted Mark to take his ideas seriously instead of oh say Eduardo’s it would be best to throw Mark a carrot. Eduardo being that carrot. Somewhere along the lines Sean had made the decision if he wanted back in Mark’s life professionally than Eduardo had to be there personally or else he was risking Eduardo getting the professionally and him stuck personally.
Not that Sean wouldn’t mind having Mark as a like a friend but he was not meant to have one girlfriend and shit someone like Mark would drive him crazy which only left professionally.
He had to get Eduardo back ASAP.
And that’s how mission Brazilian Wax came into active status. Yes, Brazilian Wax, Sean was a lot of things and a dick to Eduardo wouldn’t be changing anytime soon.
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hmm, let's see if i make sense this time.
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In Sean Parker’s terms: the addition of Eduardo to the vagina region with Sean holding the whip and directing traffic (not literally because that would be gross and awkward)
Mission 1a (because there had a few backup plans- who knew how well Eduardo was going to take the news that he had to get back together with Mark)- spam Eduardo’s Facebook account with news stories written about Mark, ones that generally paint her as being the devil. Because it would gain Eduardo’s sympathy and make him take it out on Sean.
Mission 1b- in case that fails and instead Eduardo sides with Sean as “ha ha she’s a loser and I’m not” (but really it’s Eduardo how likely is that?) spam his Facebook account pretending to be Mark. How to make that possible Seam wasn’t sure but he was going to work it out somehow; once done add a lot of sorries, you were right, I was wrong, I love you… let’s have sex. Except that last part was kind of gross and Sean would rather avoid having to say that.
Mission 2a- Once sympathy is gained and/or forgiveness mention at frequent persistent pace that Mark is miserable without Eduardo. Exaggerate. Use blatant lies if need be. Mark is dying and needs to make peace, Mark might have breast cancer, Mark is a full on robot.
Mission 2b- If Eduardo doesn’t buy this, get the minions (Chris and Dustin) involved, bribe them by any means necessary including offering to sell some of his stock (because he can always buy it right back).
Mission 3a- Lure Mark into meeting Eduardo. Prepped and ready to apologize in person with an offering of sex on the table even if Sean isn’t yet sure how to make Mark sorry without first explaining what he’s been up to. Mission 3a might need to be re-visited at a later date and time depending on the success of 1 and 2.
Mission 3b- Forcefully take Mark hostage and deliver her to Eduardo. People might ask questions and the cops might get involved- re-visit this option if all others fail.
-
So when Sean went to log onto Facebook, he was pleased to find out that Eduardo wasn’t involved enough with his own page to set security settings. This made his life easier.
Enter incriminating articles from businessinsider and tattle articles by the New York Times- and some stuff written by the gossip network known as Gawker. Oh yea, he was going to have some fun.
He posted a bunch of the articles to Eduardo’s wall and sat back waiting for the magic to happen.
As it turned out, it took Sean sitting there for almost twenty-four hours before he finally decided to throw in the towel for the evening.
Then it took another 72 hours, in which Sean was beginning to feel desperate and was wondering how to hack into Mark’s Facebook… when finally his phone beeped informing him a new private message via email.
It was from Eduardo! There had been success.
Sean opened it and read:
I don’t know why you’re sending me these articles for, we’re not friends, and considering Mark stuck her neck out for you, it makes you look like an ungrateful ass. And don’t think I won’t tell Chris and Dustin on you.
Eduardo
Sean smirked, now all he had to do was call Mark’s friends.
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And certainly if she had one, Chris would have told her. Because Chris warns her when he gets in trouble. That and generally Mark doesn’t do social calls with Sean because he has a habit of getting into trouble.
“Hey Mary?”
“Yes Mark?”
“Why do I have a meeting with Sean in the conference room at 5?”
“Because you have a meeting with Sean in the conference room at 5.”
Mark stared at the other girl from across the desk, she was not stupid, this smelled of a setup of some kind. Of whose was different matter.
“Did Chris call you today?”
“No.”
“Did Dustin?”
“No.”
“Did Sean?”
“No but Sean called Chris.”
Sean called Chris? Oh yea, this was definitely a setup.
Thankfully Mary had not been working here long enough to know that Chris would never voluntarily take Sean’s call unless there was a scheme involved or else Mark wouldn’t have gotten a heads up.
Though to figure out the scheme was another issue entirely.
-
“Hey Wardo,” Sean said into the phone.
Eduardo sighed, how this one conversation on his Facebook page had increased to Sean calling him, he had no idea but now Eduardo wished he had just let it go and never given that dick his number.
“What do you want?” he practically hissed into the phone.
This was all Mark’s fault. This was all Mark’s fault and they weren’t even talking.
Sean had pushed and pulled, and been an ass- and then dropped it on Eduardo through a series of articles that Mark had started making really bad economically bad decisions about Facebook. And Eduardo was a share-holder which meant it had to matter to him too.
So Sean told Eduardo that he was the expert with numbers so he should talk to Mark in person. To which Eduardo flipped, called Chris who then said the same thing. It was then that Eduardo was positive the universe was conspiring against him.
What re-enforced this matter was when Sean asked for his number because it was an EMERGENCY that he talk to Eduardo, not like emergency he just got arrested for cocaine emergency but like emergency Facebook’s value just dropped 2 billion dollars style emergency.
“Mark just quit her position as CEO because of the whole value of the company dropping. I have her resignation letter, in fact so does gawker and businessinsider they just posted it on their blog.”
Eduardo didn’t believe it, he didn’t because that was crazy and Mark would never do that. Until he got the site and saw the title “Zuckerberg resigns from post”.
Eduardo might have booked a flight to Palo Alto.
And Sean might have laughed when Eduardo hung up on him shouting he was going to talk to Mark nothing could stop him and Sean should schedule him a meeting. Sean might have then congratulated himself on knowing that Eduardo would see the title and not bother to open the story saying that Randi had resigned. Oh yea, he was brilliant. (and maybe Chris too for lying to Eduardo about the finances which had gone up not down).
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