from the desk of samsonite el gato
hello everybody who reads tshells journal, i am samsonite el gato - i had no say in deciding the name. it's embarrassing, i mean really, who the hell names a cat samsonite el gato? a fucking lunatic, that's who. which brings me to my point: i'm looking for another home
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1. "a lot" is relative sir. ohhhhh wise guy eh? a luggage joke, like i haven't heard those before.
2. that, sir, is specie-ist, just because i don't have opposable thumbs does not mean i should be deprived of ice cream.
3. i will not dumb myself down for someone who likes to watch laverne and shirley.
4. i'd still like a water fountain. i'm not compromising on that.
5. i think the lack of a sufficient amount of food has thinned my coat.
6. did you say hot dog? you have one? can i have some?
7. debbie will NEVER declaw me, she's a bleeding heart that doesn't believe in it, i can claw to my hearts content and i will never be declawed!!! bwahahahahahaha!!! of course, my scratching never gets me anywhere so i don't know why i still do it.
8. while i do enjoy the treats being on ground level where i can get at them quicker would it kill her to put them in my food bowl? manners cost nothing.
9. i bow to you sir, i currently have no needles stuck in my body so i guess debbie isn't all that bad.
10. i heard talk of antlers. if it comes to that, i'll thumb my way to your house, tennessee is it? you should go out and get some ice cream just in case. banana nut is my favorite.
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