evil bastard
i'm gonna be one of those really ornery old people that hits children with my cane, i just know it... one way i can tell is my tv watching habits... i watch stuff that i know is gonna piss me off, i don't know why i do it, i just can't help myself... i sit there screaming at the tv "OH COME ON!!! THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE YOU MORON!!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???!!!".... and poor denise sits there and she looks at me with her eyebrows scrunched up, looks at the tv, looks at me, looks at the tv, looks at me, and says "well why don't you change the channel you idiot?" ... which makes me laugh...until i turn back to the tv... one of the shows that always gets my hackles up is that show "the haunting" on the discovery channel, you know the one about supposedly haunted houses... it's always the same crap...it's an old house!!!! old houses make noises!!! wood settling in, old wiring, loose water pipes, foundations probably wacked... but noooooooooo, that noise has to be footsteps! or that door that creaked open? can't be a draft or the foundation is off kilter, no no no no, that's a poor soul who died a horrid death and can't pass on to the next life... these are the people that get scammed for thousands of dollars in internet scams, i just know it... and usually it's a young couple just married who've bought their first house and can't really afford it so when they start arguing suddenly they're possessed. can't just be stress, has to be possession... or if someone gets in to a car crash it's the house's fault. and and and what really gets me is their stupid logic... a few days ago i was watching one where the people living there were saying that whatever was in their house was "pure evil, you could tell it was just malevolent, and wanted us out of there"... this "evil" entity even (supposedly) picked up a heavy bed off the floor and shook it, while someone was in it... pretty powerful ay? so what does this bastard ghost do with it's power? well it chucks a salt shaker or two around the kitchen of course.....oooooooooh!!! that'll show them!!! i'm eeeeeeevil!!! or, no, i know!! i'll turn on the faucet!!! yeah! that'll scare the bejesus out of them!!! why doesn't it chuck a knife at them if it hates them so much? throw them down the stairs? drop a piano on their heads? WHY????!!!! so on that same episode this thing "entered" the medium that went to investigate... so they decided to have an exorcism on this person and "for their own safety, they tied the medium to a chair with some rope".... hm. so that's how you combat an unholy evil all powerful monster. with some rope. it can lift a big ass bed off the floor and toss it around but it's going to be thwarted by the rope... yeah, the rope is gonna keep everyone safe. .... i'd like to be at an exorcism one of these days... i'd wait until the person was screaming and howling and going through all those demon dramatics then bam! plunge a needle in their thigh ... as soon as they yelled "OW!! WHAT THE HELL?!" i'd get up and say "see? exorcisms over, all clear, that'll be 50 bucks".
that would be sweet.