ode to the bug

Mar 05, 2009 09:20


i'm tired tired tired... and sleepy.. stupid insomnia... and i don't know what i want to write about... oh wait.. i found a picture i wanted to post... here it is:


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toys

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an0penletterto March 5 2009, 15:54:54 UTC
Do you suppose your mom bought this to hide the fact that she experienced a thrill of schadenfreude every time the vinyl tubes thrashed around and hit the neighborhood kids? As she sat in her dimly-lit, avocado and harvest gold kitchen, sipping a highball, barely paying attention to The Mike Douglas Show playing in the background, she gazed out the window, knowing surely that you and all the other ankle-biters were getting theirs because Willy the Water Bug was doing her dirty work for her. She laughed, quietly, to herself as she poured another drink and went back to watching the kids vainly try to avoid the brightly colored plastic hoses, which squirted ice-cold water from the outdoor tap into their eyes, their eyes, their eyes ( ... )

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tshell March 5 2009, 16:47:30 UTC
my mom is the very stereotypical mexican woman so no, no highballs or mike douglas for her... it was more making tortillas and watching sabado gigante for her.. and believe me she didn't need the bug to do her bidding... she didn't hesitate for a second to swipe at me with her chankla : )

we did the sprinkler thing too... (when the slip 'n slide and bug bit the dust) and that was during the time when the lawn wasn't nice and sodded.. it was patchy and there were rocks strewn here and there so god help you if you took a running jump, caught a muddy patch and went down on a particularly sharp rock... you'd be on the injured list for a week...

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an0penletterto March 5 2009, 16:52:55 UTC
Man, do I know where you're coming from. The house I grew up in was my parents pride N joy because it was the first brand new home they had built. We moved in when I was 2.

Until I was maybe 6 or 7, the back yard was a collection of Illinois clay and construction rubble and "topsoil" (ha ha) and arrowheads and sharp stones. We got the front and back yards sodded when I was 6 or 7 and that's why the sprinkler constantly was going back & forth. We had a hill in the side yard and that got sodded last, so until that got done, if you were running through the sprinkler too hard and hit the end of the sod you would umf-oof-ouch-yow-yikes down the hill full of the aforementioned goodies like you'd find in one of those Saw movies for gossakes and end up on the sidewalk, bruised and bleeding.

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tshell March 5 2009, 17:07:21 UTC
ha... bruised and bleeding was more often than not the norm when playing back then... either from sadistic toys or the lack of any toys at all... when you just resorted to throwing rocks at each other because there was nothing else to play with (when the neighborhood idiot kicked the one soccer ball into crazy witch ladies backyard and no one was brave enough to jump the fence for fear crazy lady would put a hex on you)... rocks!!!

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an0penletterto March 5 2009, 17:32:34 UTC
Yeah, come to think of it, we had the rocks thing going on too. Or playing at the construction site down the street, that was fun. Or wading into the pond into the forest at the end of the street (which is now another subdivision, no more forest, thankyouverymuch) to see if the giant snapping turtle was at home. Or playing kick the can, neighborhood style, which required an old coffee can from someone's parents and lots of running around ( ... )

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an0penletterto March 5 2009, 18:09:18 UTC
Oh, p.s. on the chonkla thing. Around here that word has taken on some pretty mean overtones, like if some girl is walking down the sidewalk wearing some circa-1998 Spice Girl 8-inch platform flip-flops, if a chica sees that it's like "hey, nice chonklas, pendeja!"

Pretty much anything that's bad can be a chonkla, like your car has to be in the shop for a few days so you get a rental car and it's some POS Hyundai blow-about with manual steering and absolutely no pickup, you get to bitch to your friends about the effing chonkla you gotta drive while the truck's in the shop.

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tshell March 8 2009, 10:00:06 UTC
no, that hasn't reached san antonio, a chankla is still only something you wear or a weapon to hit your kids with... it has yet to gain the status of a kluny car. : )

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