Children are dumb
Seriously, I hate children, they are whiney, they eat too much, they smell funny, they crap themselves (probably the cause of the offensive odor). They are clingy, always have to get their way, and are overall dumb. These symptoms continue on until about the age of 16, and sometimes longer. I'll hear some parents saying how smart their child is, and i think to myself, if all children where as smart as their parents say they are, woundnt they have alrady united together to dethrone the tyrants in charge of them? Well, i look around, and alas, i have yet to discover a revolt consisting mostly of 5 year olds. In conclusion, shut the hell up, your kid is dumb, your dumb, your parents are dumb, and your entire gene pool is probably stupid. Also, no one wants to hear any stories about your kid unless one of the following happens:
- A.) the kid dies
- B.) The kid embarrasses himself
- C.) the kid craps his pants (like most children do anywase)
- D.) the kid is injured/horribly mangled/brain damage
One could also make the story more interesting by using a combination of the three, for example:
yea, yesterday, in the doctors office, my 14 year old crapped his pants, and he was so embarrassed, that he jumped out of the nearby window, and got horribly manged, but still lived. two months later, he killed himself, unable to live life with his horribly deformed face. in his suicide note, he said the kids called him shitface, fuckbucket, and hey-look-at-that-kids-face-hes-never-going-to-get-laid. Being a male high school student, he couldnt face the fact that he would never get laid, so he decided to kill himself. the end
NOW THATS a great fucking story
Gee, i write awesome stories, i was thinking about writing childrens stories, but then i rememberd that i hate children. I think ill become a school teacher just so i can refer to all my students as "Fucko" and we can play great games, like Play-Catch-With-Scissors, and drink all the chemicals in the cleaning cabinent. Then well see who can bug me for a grahm cracker if they're all DEAD. little fuckers