you might look at this now
For those of you who read this I would like to say something. As much as you might try to pretend you don't hate me I know you do and that's fine with me. I really don't care anymore. I am sorry how things ended and that could have been changed. But that was your choice not mine. You chose to lie to yourself and say that he wasn't the reason you were staying but we both knew he was. So as soon as it was over you found it very convienent just to run. Now I know that I could have handled it better also but at least I tried to be honest with you. The least you could have done would have been to lie to my face instead of lying to everyone else behind my back. I know that I tried to mend things but really I just kept thinking that it would be nice to be able to be in each other's presence. But seeing as I don't really need all that drama and fakeness in my life anymore I am taking back my offer. I read your other entries too. Most of them were lies and I think that is really sad. I don't know why you would lie on stuff that is so meaningless. I know that a lot of stuff you told me were lies and I just hate to hear that you are still lying to other people. You really have an ok life. I don't see why you feel the need to make it seem more exciting. I know that this might make you actually face the feelings you have for me and maybe it won't, but sooner or later it was coming out of my system. I can't take pretending that I feel guilty about this because truthfully I have nothing to feel guilty about. Even though you think I do, I just hope you realize how sneaky and deceitful you were also. So one way or another I am glad you know now.