(no subject)

[trusso]

1)Wham! 2)The door slamed shut as an earthquake slams the ground. 3)Bill, the pease loving war-monger, was behind it all, of course. 4)Bill was as big as a whale and twice as strong. 5) Yet Bill had the speed and dexderity of the Artful Dodger, and used it to his advantage. 6) Bill walked with the lightness that lifted the luidcricly light leaves. 7)But is this all there was to Bill? 8) Of course not, Bill poessed a drive to lend others a helping hand. 9) Bill wanted to fight evil, the evil of injustice. 10/11) Bill fought that injustice, he fought it in the streets, he fought it on the rooftops, he fought it house to house. 12) Bill then met Chuck Norris, and his demise. 13)The credo of Chuck Norris was "Justice, now there's a beauty worth fighting for!" 14) Of course Bill didn't like anyone mussleing in on his terrory. Bill called Chuck Norris out and the two of them met for a fast passed, furious fight. (15 Chuck Norris, upon meeting Bill there told Bill, "Fighting you is simply too much, I cannot handle it." "Ain't that the absolute truth," responded Bill. 16)From the foutain of wisdom that is Chuck Norris sprung the following, "Bill the only absoulte truth is, there are no absoulte truthes!" Bill put up a valiant fight, calling upon the poor opressed middle class worker to assist him in the fight, but in the end he was no match for Chuck Norris's Justice Eagle Bragade. Haveing born witness to this clash of the titans, Steve an innocent bistander could only say "Chuck Norris is kinda cool."
1)onomodepia
2)simile
3)oxymoron
4)hyperboile
5)allusion
6)illteration
7)retorical question
8)synecdoche
9)Parallell structure
10)asyndeton
11)allusion
12)Zeugma
13)Personification
14)Colloquialism
15)Aporia
16)Paradox
17)Understatement