Summer
I was going to do this post in list form to save time and organize my thoughts, but most of my thoughts are paragraphs. So I will leave them in paragraphs. Makes sense to me!
Summer's going well. I can't believe it is already July 17th. Still don't have a job, but I have hope for this week. Mom says it's at the point where I need to work at Burger King, but I don't think that is true at all. It is very frustrating not having a job.
I went to "The Island" with Jay for a weekend. It was...interesting. He, Travis and I are supposed to meet for lunch, but we can't seem to agree on a time. I haven't seen Travis since graduation! I miss both of them.
Had a wonderful 4th of July. I am always so torn whether that or Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I always say Thanksgiving, but the 4th comes in a close second. I met Sara and Heather for lunch on the 3rd, then came back here for our annual 3rd of July party. Mom and I even made firecracker martinis that were red and blue. Went to Uncle Matt's the next day for the 4th of July party; Angel made mudslide martinis (martinis are our new thing). The parade was on the 5th this year, so I went to that and then we spent the day at the lake. This year's 4th was almost comparable to my two favorite 4ths: 2001 and 2004.
Memere was in the hospital with pneumonia over the holiday. It wasn't serious and she's out now. I have been taking very good care of her.
I realized over the last few weeks that I am friends with a lot of Cancers. It seems like so many of my friends (and Mom) have had b-days recently.
Mom has been off work since Wednesday. We had a perfect beach day on Thursday with hot sun, a light breeze and big waves. We went to Grammy's yesterday, then we spent the day at the lake today. Chelsea and Kristen were there today, so we spent most of the day in the water. It was so fun and the water was like bathwater. Mom made homemade baked stuffed haddock and Grammy joined us. It has been a good week.
I have so many big decisions to make, it seems. One in particular is getting to me. I will trust my heart and not do anything major until this fall. It seems like the most logical thing to do. I feel like all of my problems would go away if I had never left Orono. Life was pretty close to perfect there. I know I can't stay there forever, but everything was right. I also feel like I am going back to school next month. Like I will be packing my boxes and getting ready to head back a month from now. Everyone is at home now. There is no marching band, no KKPsi, no friends, no fun, but it will be different in the fall when everyone is back to their normal lives and I will be here. I wonder if I will be really sad. I also wonder how I am going to feel when I go up their for the first time.
Mom told me a few weeks ago that I "need to get over UMaine." I couldn't believe she said that to me. I don't think you ever really "get over" college. I will move on, but I don't think she understands that you just don't forget about 5 important years of your life because they are over. And she should now that I have a hard time getting over things sometimes. It pisses me off when my family thinks they know everything about college and the things that go on and the feelings when in fact, none of them have ever been! Annoying!
Other than the job search, things are going pretty well. I am feeling a lot better now than I was when I first got home. I was still very attached to school and the people there and I was so anxious every day that I didn't even feel like doing anything. I felt really anxious before I even got home, though. Mom made me go to the doctor and he put me on Paxil, which sucks, but is good because I am starting to feel better. You do what have to to get by, I guess.
Well, I am off to bed. I had a long day of swimming! We are having a family party tomorrow for Chelsea's birthday. Should be a good time. Goodnight.
Summer's going well. I can't believe it is already July 17th. Still don't have a job, but I have hope for this week. Mom says it's at the point where I need to work at Burger King, but I don't think that is true at all. It is very frustrating not having a job.
I went to "The Island" with Jay for a weekend. It was...interesting. He, Travis and I are supposed to meet for lunch, but we can't seem to agree on a time. I haven't seen Travis since graduation! I miss both of them.
Had a wonderful 4th of July. I am always so torn whether that or Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I always say Thanksgiving, but the 4th comes in a close second. I met Sara and Heather for lunch on the 3rd, then came back here for our annual 3rd of July party. Mom and I even made firecracker martinis that were red and blue. Went to Uncle Matt's the next day for the 4th of July party; Angel made mudslide martinis (martinis are our new thing). The parade was on the 5th this year, so I went to that and then we spent the day at the lake. This year's 4th was almost comparable to my two favorite 4ths: 2001 and 2004.
Memere was in the hospital with pneumonia over the holiday. It wasn't serious and she's out now. I have been taking very good care of her.
I realized over the last few weeks that I am friends with a lot of Cancers. It seems like so many of my friends (and Mom) have had b-days recently.
Mom has been off work since Wednesday. We had a perfect beach day on Thursday with hot sun, a light breeze and big waves. We went to Grammy's yesterday, then we spent the day at the lake today. Chelsea and Kristen were there today, so we spent most of the day in the water. It was so fun and the water was like bathwater. Mom made homemade baked stuffed haddock and Grammy joined us. It has been a good week.
I have so many big decisions to make, it seems. One in particular is getting to me. I will trust my heart and not do anything major until this fall. It seems like the most logical thing to do. I feel like all of my problems would go away if I had never left Orono. Life was pretty close to perfect there. I know I can't stay there forever, but everything was right. I also feel like I am going back to school next month. Like I will be packing my boxes and getting ready to head back a month from now. Everyone is at home now. There is no marching band, no KKPsi, no friends, no fun, but it will be different in the fall when everyone is back to their normal lives and I will be here. I wonder if I will be really sad. I also wonder how I am going to feel when I go up their for the first time.
Mom told me a few weeks ago that I "need to get over UMaine." I couldn't believe she said that to me. I don't think you ever really "get over" college. I will move on, but I don't think she understands that you just don't forget about 5 important years of your life because they are over. And she should now that I have a hard time getting over things sometimes. It pisses me off when my family thinks they know everything about college and the things that go on and the feelings when in fact, none of them have ever been! Annoying!
Other than the job search, things are going pretty well. I am feeling a lot better now than I was when I first got home. I was still very attached to school and the people there and I was so anxious every day that I didn't even feel like doing anything. I felt really anxious before I even got home, though. Mom made me go to the doctor and he put me on Paxil, which sucks, but is good because I am starting to feel better. You do what have to to get by, I guess.
Well, I am off to bed. I had a long day of swimming! We are having a family party tomorrow for Chelsea's birthday. Should be a good time. Goodnight.