4. locked up and BORED
Bernie, trying to do your taxes here, but seeing as you don't actually have an income I've just had to imagine that all that alcohol you've been imbibing counts as a salary.
So, made a rough estimation. Say you drink 2 bottles of wine (seriously rough estimation) and have at least 6 pints of beer (including other various hopsy beverages) during the course of one day. Well, that means that during a week you have 14 bottles of wine and 42 pints. Per month that makes, on average, 56 bottles of wine and about 168 pints. Give or take, of course.
Your "year salary" is 672 bottles of wine and 2,016 glasses of beer. Again, on average. Some days it's less, some days it's much, much more.
Now Bernie, let's talk about deductions. How much can we deduct of your salary by saying that it's a medical condition and all that alcohol you've been sucking back is needed in order to function as a proper warden? Yeah, I was just going to leave this part blank, seeing as you don't function as a coherent person, much less a warden anyway.
So no deductions.
Made any donations to charity recently?
So, made a rough estimation. Say you drink 2 bottles of wine (seriously rough estimation) and have at least 6 pints of beer (including other various hopsy beverages) during the course of one day. Well, that means that during a week you have 14 bottles of wine and 42 pints. Per month that makes, on average, 56 bottles of wine and about 168 pints. Give or take, of course.
Your "year salary" is 672 bottles of wine and 2,016 glasses of beer. Again, on average. Some days it's less, some days it's much, much more.
Now Bernie, let's talk about deductions. How much can we deduct of your salary by saying that it's a medical condition and all that alcohol you've been sucking back is needed in order to function as a proper warden? Yeah, I was just going to leave this part blank, seeing as you don't function as a coherent person, much less a warden anyway.
So no deductions.
Made any donations to charity recently?