A little more ready, a little less ready
The best thing that happened last week: the room got finished! And it's absolutely gorgeous. I almost hate to think of having to change it in two years when she moves to a big bed. I may have to go get more of the same fabric and beg my step-mom to make a twin-sized bedskirt and duvet cover! The colors are perfect, all the little touches are just right, and sitting in the room just makes me smile. We're good to go.
Well, maybe not. At my appointment on Wednesday my doctor said I'm 1 cm dilated and barely effacing. Chances are highly likely that I'll have to be induced, unless something funky happens between now and next Thursday and Baby shifts herself into gear. On one hand I'm so ready to have her out, but on the other hand I really would rather wait until Thursday or Friday, when I know my mom will be here and Henry will be taken care of. I can wait one more week. We'll see if Baby can.
I know she's dropped. I have a hint of a waistline again, I can breathe more easily, I go to the bathroom a heckuva a lot more, and my hips hurt like crazy at night when I try to sleep.
I keep thinking of how long this pregnancy has seemed, how much it's been affecting our lives, how much it's affected my health/energy ... I just can't imagine wanting to go through this again. I'm not one of those women who says, "I want four kids regardless!" And i'm not one of those women for whom pregnancy is a glowing, wonderful, perfect experience. I love my son more than anything, and I know I'll love my daughter the same. And I'd go through it all over again to have them. But this is it. I'm done. For three years I was fine with being done after just Henry; this time around seals the deal. There will be no other babies for us. Two is just enough, and I know neither Marc nor I ... and probably Henry too at this point ... want to experience nine more months like the ones we've just had. I miss being a mommy to Henry, I miss having a clean house, I miss Marc's attention (for some reason pregnancy has made me invisible to him), I miss being comfortable. I miss my life. This little girl will be wonderful and I can't wait to have her here and start doing all the things moms and daughters can do together, but I haven't enjoyed the process.
I can only hope when she starts having a family, it comes much more easily for her. No mother would wish this on a child. ;o)
Well, maybe not. At my appointment on Wednesday my doctor said I'm 1 cm dilated and barely effacing. Chances are highly likely that I'll have to be induced, unless something funky happens between now and next Thursday and Baby shifts herself into gear. On one hand I'm so ready to have her out, but on the other hand I really would rather wait until Thursday or Friday, when I know my mom will be here and Henry will be taken care of. I can wait one more week. We'll see if Baby can.
I know she's dropped. I have a hint of a waistline again, I can breathe more easily, I go to the bathroom a heckuva a lot more, and my hips hurt like crazy at night when I try to sleep.
I keep thinking of how long this pregnancy has seemed, how much it's been affecting our lives, how much it's affected my health/energy ... I just can't imagine wanting to go through this again. I'm not one of those women who says, "I want four kids regardless!" And i'm not one of those women for whom pregnancy is a glowing, wonderful, perfect experience. I love my son more than anything, and I know I'll love my daughter the same. And I'd go through it all over again to have them. But this is it. I'm done. For three years I was fine with being done after just Henry; this time around seals the deal. There will be no other babies for us. Two is just enough, and I know neither Marc nor I ... and probably Henry too at this point ... want to experience nine more months like the ones we've just had. I miss being a mommy to Henry, I miss having a clean house, I miss Marc's attention (for some reason pregnancy has made me invisible to him), I miss being comfortable. I miss my life. This little girl will be wonderful and I can't wait to have her here and start doing all the things moms and daughters can do together, but I haven't enjoyed the process.
I can only hope when she starts having a family, it comes much more easily for her. No mother would wish this on a child. ;o)