Fic: "Dualla's Daily Dose Of Gossip"
Title: Dualla's Daily Dose Of Gossip
Characters: Dee, Gaeta
Pairings: Gaeta/m, Chuckles/m
Rating: R to be on the safe side but it's all talk
Spoilers: Late s1
Beta: ebuchala
Wordcount: ~900 words
Summary: Chuckles' porn has improved. Dee investigates.
Author's Note: Written for the "Little Black Dress" Challenge on gaeta-squee. I thought it was time for some silliness. :)
Also refers to my fic "Stakes" but you don't need to know that one to get this one.
Dualla's Daily Dose Of Gossip
On most days, Gaeta received his daily dose of gossip from Dee.
Nodding her a hello, he stepped up to the sink next to hers and started cleaning up for work. She was almost done as always, and she didn’t waste time with a greeting.
“Did you hear?” she said, busy putting her hair back. “Chuckles the nugget got lucky.”
“Really?” Gaeta answered, searching for his razor in distraction. “With who?”
“A guy, would you believe it,” Dee said. “Whoever he is, he’s awfully discreet, and so is Chuckles. Nobody would have known if it weren’t for, you know, the usual suspects.” She gestured vaguely with her free hand. “Skulls, Cadman, Simmons.” She listed the most chatty of the gay bunch on Galactica.
“And I assume they just spotted it on their finely tuned Dradis,” Gaeta said dryly, fully aware that Chuckles the nugget, while Galactica’s most excellent porn writer, was also said to be straight. Just because Gaeta might not have been a part of the chatty crowd didn’t mean he wasn’t informed about the availability of every crewman down to the museum’s janitor (a fine looking lad called Charley, who labeled himself as asexual much to all the crew’s dismay).
Dee grinned. “I wouldn’t know about that,” she said. “But Skulls told Boomer that he saw it right away in Chuckles’ latest story. It features an orgy. A gay orgy.”
“He writes fine porn,” Gaeta said benevolently. “And he’s equal opportunity. I like that in a writer. I won’t say I don’t appreciate the straight porn, what with... what’s his name? That Cavil? With the daddy kink? But that’s only because I don’t have much of a choice. Granted, Chuckles tends to be a bit off about the details when... oh. Oh.” He shot her a glance, eyebrows traveling north. “He improved?”
“Most accurate gay sex that he’s ever read, Skulls says. Creative yet full of lifelike detail. He’s especially fond of Chuckles’ sudden discovery of sex toys, although he’s puzzled about the excessive use of chairs.”
Gaeta remained silent for a moment, concentrating on shaving his left dimple. “Sounds like I should go and get a copy,” he said, smirking at himself in the mirror in search of stubbles. “And there’s nothing wrong with chairs.”
Dee watched him for a moment, an exploring expression on her face. She was done and ready to go back to her quarters for her uniform, but she didn’t move. Eventually, she leaned against the sink, eyeing Gaeta some more.
“You know the funny part?” she asked.
“Do tell,” Gaeta said, brushing traces of shaving cream off his ear.
Dee gave him a long look. “Nobody knows who it is.”
“You already said that,” Gaeta said.
“It bears repeating,” Dee said. “And you know Galactica’s gay bunch. You are part of that bunch. So you know how strange that is. You know how they know everything about everybody, always.” She wrinkled her nose. “I think they have actual lists of everybody gay on the ship. One row for ‘actives’ and one for the ones they still want to... how do you call that?”
“Turn,” Gaeta said with a grin, and she grimaced.
“Right,” she said with dignity. “Those you still want to turn. Long, long lists.”
“Nah,” Gaeta said, unperturbed. “I offered them mine for comparison. They weren’t interested.”
Dee snorted. Eyes twinkling, Gaeta shot her a look, then concentrated back on the mirror.
“Whoever it is, he must be awfully discreet,” Dee continued. “Somebody who manages to keep it all quiet although people are investigating already. And since, you know, it doesn’t sound like they’re having unobtrusive sex, it has to be somebody who knows Galactica well, wouldn’t you say?”
“Well, that only leaves the whole crew,” Gaeta said dryly.
“The whole crew isn’t discreet,” Dee huffed, using her fingers to count them off. “There’s Adama himself, and let’s just not go there. And Chief Tyrol is discreet and a couple of engineers are. Me, I’m very...” Gaeta snorted. She didn’t miss a beat. “...okay, maybe not so much me but Hammilton is, one or two ECO, Jammer... all of them either straight or female, you might notice... and you.” She looked him up and down. “You’re a very discreet man, Mr. Gaeta.”
“Why, thank you, Petty Officer,” Gaeta said, rinsing the razor.
“You’re also gay.”
“Brilliant observation.”
Dee wrinkled her nose, obviously knowing that she wasn’t getting anywhere. This was Lt. Gaeta after all, more closed than an oyster even on a good day, and they weren’t exactly having this conversation for the first time.
Throwing her towel over her shoulder, she leaned close to him on her way out and whispered into his ear.
“I’ll catch you with somebody one day,” she said. “And then you’ll have to tell me all about that trick with the raptor control stick that Chuckles serenaded in his story, and you’ll give me that other list with the names and the score that I know you keep hidden in your bunk. Sir.”
As expected, Gaeta just smirked. Glaring at him nastily for one last time, she strode out of the room. The hatch closed with a most dramatic thud.
Gaeta reached for his towel, whistling under his breath.
Dee never got her daily dose of gossip from him.
Characters: Dee, Gaeta
Pairings: Gaeta/m, Chuckles/m
Rating: R to be on the safe side but it's all talk
Spoilers: Late s1
Beta: ebuchala
Wordcount: ~900 words
Summary: Chuckles' porn has improved. Dee investigates.
Author's Note: Written for the "Little Black Dress" Challenge on gaeta-squee. I thought it was time for some silliness. :)
Also refers to my fic "Stakes" but you don't need to know that one to get this one.
Dualla's Daily Dose Of Gossip
On most days, Gaeta received his daily dose of gossip from Dee.
Nodding her a hello, he stepped up to the sink next to hers and started cleaning up for work. She was almost done as always, and she didn’t waste time with a greeting.
“Did you hear?” she said, busy putting her hair back. “Chuckles the nugget got lucky.”
“Really?” Gaeta answered, searching for his razor in distraction. “With who?”
“A guy, would you believe it,” Dee said. “Whoever he is, he’s awfully discreet, and so is Chuckles. Nobody would have known if it weren’t for, you know, the usual suspects.” She gestured vaguely with her free hand. “Skulls, Cadman, Simmons.” She listed the most chatty of the gay bunch on Galactica.
“And I assume they just spotted it on their finely tuned Dradis,” Gaeta said dryly, fully aware that Chuckles the nugget, while Galactica’s most excellent porn writer, was also said to be straight. Just because Gaeta might not have been a part of the chatty crowd didn’t mean he wasn’t informed about the availability of every crewman down to the museum’s janitor (a fine looking lad called Charley, who labeled himself as asexual much to all the crew’s dismay).
Dee grinned. “I wouldn’t know about that,” she said. “But Skulls told Boomer that he saw it right away in Chuckles’ latest story. It features an orgy. A gay orgy.”
“He writes fine porn,” Gaeta said benevolently. “And he’s equal opportunity. I like that in a writer. I won’t say I don’t appreciate the straight porn, what with... what’s his name? That Cavil? With the daddy kink? But that’s only because I don’t have much of a choice. Granted, Chuckles tends to be a bit off about the details when... oh. Oh.” He shot her a glance, eyebrows traveling north. “He improved?”
“Most accurate gay sex that he’s ever read, Skulls says. Creative yet full of lifelike detail. He’s especially fond of Chuckles’ sudden discovery of sex toys, although he’s puzzled about the excessive use of chairs.”
Gaeta remained silent for a moment, concentrating on shaving his left dimple. “Sounds like I should go and get a copy,” he said, smirking at himself in the mirror in search of stubbles. “And there’s nothing wrong with chairs.”
Dee watched him for a moment, an exploring expression on her face. She was done and ready to go back to her quarters for her uniform, but she didn’t move. Eventually, she leaned against the sink, eyeing Gaeta some more.
“You know the funny part?” she asked.
“Do tell,” Gaeta said, brushing traces of shaving cream off his ear.
Dee gave him a long look. “Nobody knows who it is.”
“You already said that,” Gaeta said.
“It bears repeating,” Dee said. “And you know Galactica’s gay bunch. You are part of that bunch. So you know how strange that is. You know how they know everything about everybody, always.” She wrinkled her nose. “I think they have actual lists of everybody gay on the ship. One row for ‘actives’ and one for the ones they still want to... how do you call that?”
“Turn,” Gaeta said with a grin, and she grimaced.
“Right,” she said with dignity. “Those you still want to turn. Long, long lists.”
“Nah,” Gaeta said, unperturbed. “I offered them mine for comparison. They weren’t interested.”
Dee snorted. Eyes twinkling, Gaeta shot her a look, then concentrated back on the mirror.
“Whoever it is, he must be awfully discreet,” Dee continued. “Somebody who manages to keep it all quiet although people are investigating already. And since, you know, it doesn’t sound like they’re having unobtrusive sex, it has to be somebody who knows Galactica well, wouldn’t you say?”
“Well, that only leaves the whole crew,” Gaeta said dryly.
“The whole crew isn’t discreet,” Dee huffed, using her fingers to count them off. “There’s Adama himself, and let’s just not go there. And Chief Tyrol is discreet and a couple of engineers are. Me, I’m very...” Gaeta snorted. She didn’t miss a beat. “...okay, maybe not so much me but Hammilton is, one or two ECO, Jammer... all of them either straight or female, you might notice... and you.” She looked him up and down. “You’re a very discreet man, Mr. Gaeta.”
“Why, thank you, Petty Officer,” Gaeta said, rinsing the razor.
“You’re also gay.”
“Brilliant observation.”
Dee wrinkled her nose, obviously knowing that she wasn’t getting anywhere. This was Lt. Gaeta after all, more closed than an oyster even on a good day, and they weren’t exactly having this conversation for the first time.
Throwing her towel over her shoulder, she leaned close to him on her way out and whispered into his ear.
“I’ll catch you with somebody one day,” she said. “And then you’ll have to tell me all about that trick with the raptor control stick that Chuckles serenaded in his story, and you’ll give me that other list with the names and the score that I know you keep hidden in your bunk. Sir.”
As expected, Gaeta just smirked. Glaring at him nastily for one last time, she strode out of the room. The hatch closed with a most dramatic thud.
Gaeta reached for his towel, whistling under his breath.
Dee never got her daily dose of gossip from him.