totally too heavy for livejournal. happy thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving's at my house this year. It used to be at my aunt's before she died.
She died just before Thanksgiving last year. This year her husband just died about a week ago. Because of that, my aunt and cousins from Florida are here this year.
I never really called her husband my uncle. I guess technically he was, but they got married while or just before I was alive, he wasn't the most likable dude and his chunk of family (except for one person) was never very nice to me at all. They are the most Irish bunch of people you'll ever meet, it's absurd.
So it's not really him dying that makes me sad, and I feel awfully saying that because it is actually very sad. It's more of everything that was left in the air from my aunt dying coming back.
He was way older than her, and in pretty shitty condition. No one could have ever in a million years guessed my aunt was going to go first. Now half of Ireland's having a field day on her house, and it doesn't seem right. We're supposed to go over there to try and get some of her stuff. I wasn't going to go because it's probably going to be pretty tense but I really should.
My cousin (the one from Florida) stole a bunch of photo albums from her house back when she died and we thought they were going to try and keep them from us. Him and I ended up being in half of the pictures.
we're rallying for me to get her piano. I really hope I get it. When I lived at her house for a year I used to just yell out songs all the time until she'd sit down and figure out how to play them for me.
It looks like my cousin (her son) is getting completely shafted, which is awful because he's had so many fucked up things happen to him already. This guy that just died was his stepdad and was always a bit of a shit to him. Looks like that may even continue in his death.
and it's sad because my aunt was great. She was funny, she was the only one in the family who was ALWAYS cool to me. Even on her death bed she was hilarious.
and I'm not sure why but a year later I still haven't gotten over her dying one bit.
I think I just didn't have a good concept of what family means at all until she was dying. She was the one that brought everyone together for stuff like Thanksgiving. Now it just feels like everyone's struggling through it for the sake of it and it's sad.
and now it's just us and on a bit of good timing my family from Florida. Had her husband not died, who would I be with on Thanksgiving?
and even while I'm writing this, I could hear downstairs my mother and my aunt from florida trying to figure out this weird egg salad-type stuff we used to always have on thanksgiving. and my mother says "I was going to call Margie and ask what we're leaving out, but she's not alive anymore".
This egg salad is going to taste like asshole.
but really, I hope everyone has an awesome thanksgiving. and if I haven't seen you yet, I hope I do before you go back to school.
She died just before Thanksgiving last year. This year her husband just died about a week ago. Because of that, my aunt and cousins from Florida are here this year.
I never really called her husband my uncle. I guess technically he was, but they got married while or just before I was alive, he wasn't the most likable dude and his chunk of family (except for one person) was never very nice to me at all. They are the most Irish bunch of people you'll ever meet, it's absurd.
So it's not really him dying that makes me sad, and I feel awfully saying that because it is actually very sad. It's more of everything that was left in the air from my aunt dying coming back.
He was way older than her, and in pretty shitty condition. No one could have ever in a million years guessed my aunt was going to go first. Now half of Ireland's having a field day on her house, and it doesn't seem right. We're supposed to go over there to try and get some of her stuff. I wasn't going to go because it's probably going to be pretty tense but I really should.
My cousin (the one from Florida) stole a bunch of photo albums from her house back when she died and we thought they were going to try and keep them from us. Him and I ended up being in half of the pictures.
we're rallying for me to get her piano. I really hope I get it. When I lived at her house for a year I used to just yell out songs all the time until she'd sit down and figure out how to play them for me.
It looks like my cousin (her son) is getting completely shafted, which is awful because he's had so many fucked up things happen to him already. This guy that just died was his stepdad and was always a bit of a shit to him. Looks like that may even continue in his death.
and it's sad because my aunt was great. She was funny, she was the only one in the family who was ALWAYS cool to me. Even on her death bed she was hilarious.
and I'm not sure why but a year later I still haven't gotten over her dying one bit.
I think I just didn't have a good concept of what family means at all until she was dying. She was the one that brought everyone together for stuff like Thanksgiving. Now it just feels like everyone's struggling through it for the sake of it and it's sad.
and now it's just us and on a bit of good timing my family from Florida. Had her husband not died, who would I be with on Thanksgiving?
and even while I'm writing this, I could hear downstairs my mother and my aunt from florida trying to figure out this weird egg salad-type stuff we used to always have on thanksgiving. and my mother says "I was going to call Margie and ask what we're leaving out, but she's not alive anymore".
This egg salad is going to taste like asshole.
but really, I hope everyone has an awesome thanksgiving. and if I haven't seen you yet, I hope I do before you go back to school.