TRADEmarked at TM

[troubledcitizen]

i was dead broke,
beg at the
turnstyle broke.
it was starting to rain.
i ran home and
gathered change
from apartment crevases
while the radiator
groaned, moaned, droaned
and my cat
chased a mouse
under the bin
i was desperately searching
through.

the mouse looked
scared and i imagined
him saying goodbye
to his life.
a chance many of
us will never have.
and even fewer
would ever want.

THEN
on the way down
to my bodega
a woman had hung
a single black rose
from her window
and in dim light
crying as softly
and sadly
as the rose's
dyed peddles,
she tore at her
chest, like
she had said
goodbye to her
own life long ago
but it refused
to leave.

eventually..
three young thugs stopped
and told me to be safe.
a pretty girl in an
ugly neighborhood
like this
is doomed
to wither
and break.
i pointed to
the dyed rose
and said
"not if it's faking it."
they asked for my number,
when i declined to provide it
they whispered
"ugly whore"
and walked away.

when i finally arrived,
my bodega man asked
"hows quitting smoking going?"
"oh you know
to broke to smoke
to broken not too.
i'll take four
st. ides 22s
and a loosey"
he laughed and gave me the single
cigarette and the beer
"you know these things are killing you, dont you?"
"yes." i replied. "but as long as i accept whats coming
i figure im better off than most."

when i got home
the mouse was dead
but my cat was
pawing at it ecstatically.
c'est la vie i said.
c'est la vie..