Signs
It snowed just like I thought it would today. In fact, it was heavy. We had about 2-3 inches of snow fall in a matter of hours. It was kinda crazy and people here were acting like it was the apocalypse. They were exaggerating though, and so am I.
People do funny things. I do funny things sometime. All this week, I was thinking about calling you-know-who. I don’t know why. I guess I wanted to talk to her or something. We’d talked once since I last saw her on the internets, but that didn’t feel very good. I was waiting for her to call me I guess. Logic would tell me that she wouldn’t call…well it wouldn’t tell me that, but it would ask me, why would she call? It wouldn’t make much sense for her just to call on a whim. Heck, she didn’t even do that back when.
So here I was trying to decide what to do, and honestly, it was bothering me. Things like that really shouldn’t. I keep telling myself I won’t let it, but of course it does. You’re asking why aren’t you? Well, heck man, I can’t come clean just like that. I was addicted before, and at the very least, I need little doses from the patch to help me get through it all.
I couldn’t make up my mind what to do. I really wanted to, but I was worried it’d be weird, or she’s being weird, etc. Well I mean, a lot of it has to do with me, but I’m trying my best to make it not weird. I’m not used to doing this. I’m not used to playing nice, but this time, I really want to. Things make sense, somehow, in my head…if I lie enough.
Anyways, what do friends do? Obviously, friends call for fun sometimes. It doesn’t have to be weird. Why should it? I’d call any of my friends out of nowhere just to talk, catch up etc, so why did this have to be different? Well considering how our conversations tended to go, all signs pointed to the fact that she didn’t want to hear from me. Despite what she had told me in the past, it didn’t seem like I was helping a thing. Should I distance myself further for her sake? Should I just let it go and wait for her to call instead?
Then I got a fortune cookie from my co-worker a little after lunch yesterday. The fortune in it said “Now is the time to call loved ones from a distance.” Guess what I did?
People do funny things. I do funny things sometime. All this week, I was thinking about calling you-know-who. I don’t know why. I guess I wanted to talk to her or something. We’d talked once since I last saw her on the internets, but that didn’t feel very good. I was waiting for her to call me I guess. Logic would tell me that she wouldn’t call…well it wouldn’t tell me that, but it would ask me, why would she call? It wouldn’t make much sense for her just to call on a whim. Heck, she didn’t even do that back when.
So here I was trying to decide what to do, and honestly, it was bothering me. Things like that really shouldn’t. I keep telling myself I won’t let it, but of course it does. You’re asking why aren’t you? Well, heck man, I can’t come clean just like that. I was addicted before, and at the very least, I need little doses from the patch to help me get through it all.
I couldn’t make up my mind what to do. I really wanted to, but I was worried it’d be weird, or she’s being weird, etc. Well I mean, a lot of it has to do with me, but I’m trying my best to make it not weird. I’m not used to doing this. I’m not used to playing nice, but this time, I really want to. Things make sense, somehow, in my head…if I lie enough.
Anyways, what do friends do? Obviously, friends call for fun sometimes. It doesn’t have to be weird. Why should it? I’d call any of my friends out of nowhere just to talk, catch up etc, so why did this have to be different? Well considering how our conversations tended to go, all signs pointed to the fact that she didn’t want to hear from me. Despite what she had told me in the past, it didn’t seem like I was helping a thing. Should I distance myself further for her sake? Should I just let it go and wait for her to call instead?
Then I got a fortune cookie from my co-worker a little after lunch yesterday. The fortune in it said “Now is the time to call loved ones from a distance.” Guess what I did?