Another Day, Another nightmare survived
In life I’ve learned that people only show their true personality when they are alone in the dark, where they is no one around to judge, or to impress. No matter how much people want to say they are real when around their friends, they are not. Everyday people try to impress their friends by acting different, even if they do not know it. I’ve noticed this a lot, when I’m around my own friends I always act different. I act tough, as if I do not feel any pain at all, but in truth, I hurt all the time. I say that I don’t need anyone to be by my side, to love me. To comfort me when I’m feeling down. But at night I lay awake, wishing someone laid next to me, holding me in their arms, whispering soft words into my ears, tell me that they loved me and would never leave my side, Most of the time, I just stay awake thinking about this, until it’s really late, and then I fall asleep.
Today I was feeling the same again, as I do mostly every other day, alone. The one thing I hate being is alone, and I’m always alone, even if I’m talking to Kate, or surrounded by a group of people at my school, or hanging out with friends. I always feel, a thousand miles away from everyone, lost and forever lost. I don’t know why I feel like this, it’s just a feeling I can never shake away, when I’m around my friends mostly. It’s like I can hear them speak, but I just can’t speak on my own, I’ve done this before. When I talked with Dameon and Kitty… maybe I’m broken? But I can’t be sent back because my warranty is already over. I wondered many times in my life, what would happen if I were in a different body? Would I be happier? Or. Will I be the same, did god curse me to this life of loneliness’
Today it rained, oh, how much I love the rain. How calm and peaceful it makes me feel as it falls down onto the ground yes even the loud sounds and the bright flashes make me calm as well. I sat outside for a bit watching the rain, listening and watching the thunder and lightning, but instead of feeling calm, I felt empty and. alone. I don’t know really what to do with Kate, every time I see her; I fall for her even more, and every hour she is not there. I worry, and hurt. I don’t want to break it up, unless I know that it would not hurt her, as much as it will hurt me, that’s the last thing I want to do is hurt her.
Well, there is one good thing that happened today, I made people laugh. It’s one of the only good things I can say about myself when I try to say something good, I have a good sense of humor, which I wouldn’t want to give up for anything. It makes me feel, better when people laugh at the jokes I say, and say that I’m funny. Laughing is another thing I like, since it’s the same thing everyone has in common. Also another thing I like about me, is my writing skills, I enjoy writing and expressing my emotions and feeling by making characters, and stories. I try to help as many people as I can to RP, it makes me feel good about myself knowing that I can teach someone something, and they become better with what I taught them.
Well that’s enough for today, well at least right now, so I’m going to leave you off with one of my favorite sayings that Joseph Stalin as ever said.
One death is a tragedy, Ten million deaths is a statistic.
Today I was feeling the same again, as I do mostly every other day, alone. The one thing I hate being is alone, and I’m always alone, even if I’m talking to Kate, or surrounded by a group of people at my school, or hanging out with friends. I always feel, a thousand miles away from everyone, lost and forever lost. I don’t know why I feel like this, it’s just a feeling I can never shake away, when I’m around my friends mostly. It’s like I can hear them speak, but I just can’t speak on my own, I’ve done this before. When I talked with Dameon and Kitty… maybe I’m broken? But I can’t be sent back because my warranty is already over. I wondered many times in my life, what would happen if I were in a different body? Would I be happier? Or. Will I be the same, did god curse me to this life of loneliness’
Today it rained, oh, how much I love the rain. How calm and peaceful it makes me feel as it falls down onto the ground yes even the loud sounds and the bright flashes make me calm as well. I sat outside for a bit watching the rain, listening and watching the thunder and lightning, but instead of feeling calm, I felt empty and. alone. I don’t know really what to do with Kate, every time I see her; I fall for her even more, and every hour she is not there. I worry, and hurt. I don’t want to break it up, unless I know that it would not hurt her, as much as it will hurt me, that’s the last thing I want to do is hurt her.
Well, there is one good thing that happened today, I made people laugh. It’s one of the only good things I can say about myself when I try to say something good, I have a good sense of humor, which I wouldn’t want to give up for anything. It makes me feel, better when people laugh at the jokes I say, and say that I’m funny. Laughing is another thing I like, since it’s the same thing everyone has in common. Also another thing I like about me, is my writing skills, I enjoy writing and expressing my emotions and feeling by making characters, and stories. I try to help as many people as I can to RP, it makes me feel good about myself knowing that I can teach someone something, and they become better with what I taught them.
Well that’s enough for today, well at least right now, so I’m going to leave you off with one of my favorite sayings that Joseph Stalin as ever said.
One death is a tragedy, Ten million deaths is a statistic.