Confusing
So far life has been great I haven't had too many problems but since I started talking to Julio again I don't know what to do I mean I'm always think about him but at the same time I wanna be with Abraham. It's confusing because I really like Abraham and I know he really likes me and well I know as a couple we would last, I don't know for how long but I know just know we would. Then then I bring up Julio I don't know where to start.. hes amazing and I'm still not over him. I've like Julio for quite sometime now and well hes amazing! hes funny, not shy, mature, can take a joke, thinks I'm a great person too. Its just hes still with Hannah and I'm still with Abraham but yet we both wanna be together but its hard. I miss him a lot. Its dumb cause I daydream about us being together and just getting along and having fun but then thats when dad comes in. He doesn't trust me. No matter how much he says he does hes really doesn't mean it. I cant blame him I've done things that haven't always been the best move but I tried and things didn't go the way I planed which sucks cause I would take it all back and try and forget all the things I did. But thats besides the point. My point is I'm lost. I know what I want and its Julio. I see something in him I'm just not sure of yet but I like it a lot and I cant not see my self not at least being friends with him. Hes a great guy and I know I've said it a thousand times but ill say it even more I adore him. I don't know why but with him I feel something different ..Yet its something the same like what I feel when I'm around Abraham and Ezequiel..He confuses me and maybe that what I like, Maybe thats just what I need to help my self to "choose" between 3 amazing guys. Don't get me wrong I fucking love Ezequiel and am break taken with him. But I don't think mine and Ezequiel's relationship will work too much longer if we don't slow things down. Then with Abraham I really cant complain about things with him because we haven't gotten mad at each other and I don't really have anything bad to say about him but then I know if I get with Julio I'm not gonna see him almost ever. Unless I see him on the weekends. Its already bad with Abraham cause I almost never see him and when I do its only for a little. I don't think I could handle a boyfriend who doesn't go to my same school. It would be hard, not only in the since id do something like cheat, but Id probably miss them a lot and Id be somewhat lonely but I don't know with Julio things might be different and I might see him more then I do now, or I might not but I have to try right? In order to know you have to be able to question the what if and how and why. and for him Id be willing to to question all that just to know if what I had hoped comes true but I wont know until I try it. This is just something I have to deal with in my life cause I know no one but me can answer the questions I ask. I think I'm ready. I think I can do this. I just don't know yet. Please help me.