[fic] chapter 4 - Shelter
Title: Shelter
Author: miduyoh (before: jadexscandal )
Length: Mini series (4/10)
Pairing: JaeSuChun (JaeSu, YooSu, JaeChun)
Rating: R
Themes: Drama, Angst, Tragedy and Romance.
Summary: Even when you want to do everything for the one you love, to perform his last wish, some can’t just bring it up to love someone they hate.
A/N: I know it's been long since I updated this, so here's a brand new chapter :D!
Previous: 00.|| 01.|| 02. || 03.
Chapter 4
It was still raining when Yoochun started the engine of his car. Visitors hour was over and he was heading back to his apartment, with Jaejoong on the passenger’s seat.
He’d fallen asleep as soon as he got into the car. And Yoochun noticed that today he’d been so silent. Now he was snoring softly, his head leaning against the window.
Every now and then Yoochun would slightly turn his head to look at his childhood friend, wondering how everything could’ve end up like this. They used to be best buds, they even called each other soul mates, until that one time when he kissed Junsu right in front of Jaejoong.
Did he regret doing that? Yes and no. Yes because it broke their friendship… and no because he got Junsu’s first kiss. Jaejoong wasn’t the only one who was in love with Junsu, and when Jaejoong told him he had a crush on him he wanted to be faster. He wanted to have Junsu for himself.
But Junsu told him he didn’t like him more than a friend.
It had been taking him some time to get over it, unfortunately, but nothing was the same after that. Junsu grew more silent and Jaejoong just totally ignored him.
The last months of high school were awkward and after they graduated they just took separate paths. The three who used to be best friends for such a long time were gone.
As soon as Yoochun pulled up the drive way and brought his car to a halt he stared down at Jaejoong. He was sleeping so delicately that he didn’t want to wake him up, so he wrapped his arms around him and carried him into his apartment.
The guy needed some well-earned sleep.
---
That night bad dreams took over his mind, Jaejoong sprung up from under the covers, breathing harshly and covered in cold sweat. That dream had seemed so real, the image of Junsu laying in a coffin still clear on his retina. His vision became blurry as he caught himself crying, only soft whimpers and desperate soft leaving his mouth.
His fingers moved up to massage his temples, he needed to calm down.. otherwise he knew for sure he’d go crazy. He couldn’t have that right now, he had to be strong for Junsu, he knew he had to! Then he noticed something, he was lying in a bed..
Was it Yoochun’s bed?
Still sobbing, Jaejoong got up from the bed, wobbling over to the kitchen. The last thing he remembered was walking to the car with Yoochun, nothing else. He must’ve been sleeping ever since. Maybe the lack of food in his stomach made him see those terrible things that freaked him out.
His shaking hand pulled the handle of fridge, the bright light made him squeeze his eyes close. “Damnit..” He muttered under his breath, how he hated to wake up in the middle of the night for food. He should be resting now. In the end he flopped himself down at the dinner table, munching on some random sandwich. Luckily he felt a lot better after the first few bites.
It made him think, think of all those times he, Junsu and Yoochun had spend together. Summers, winters.. All those times he’d enjoyed every bit of their presence. Then why had everything to turn out so differently.
He did blame Yoochun for this, partly. He thought they were friends, best friends.. And when he told Yoochun he was planning to confess to Junsu he’d seemed so supportive, happy even.
But maybe.. Behind that smiled was another expression. Jealousy perhaps?
He never knew what’d happened between those two, he’d been to astonished by that kiss. Junsu’s first kiss, that he’d never asked what happened afterwards.
He sighed, finishing off his sandwich. He felt lonely, the darkness of the night making it even worse. He shivered, maybe he should better go back to bed. But then, If he was sleeping in Yoochun’s bed.. Where would the idiot be? Curiously he started to walk around to, in the end, find the guy sleeping on the couch.
A weird sting squeezed his heart. He tried to ignore it, but without success. He strode closer, his eyes taking in the sight of Yoochun sleeping. His hair was tangled, the blankets shifted so they showed his naked chest. Wouldn’t he get a cold like that?
Wait… Was he worried about Yoochun?! He quickly shook his head, trying to get that thought out, until he stared at his childhood friend again. Maybe, the guy wasn’t so bad as he thought.
Slowly he sat himself down on the only free space on the couch, studying Yoochun closely. Nervously he laid a hand on Yoochun’s thigh. “Where did it all go wrong, Yoochun-ah…” His voice came out soft, his eyes saddening the more he stared at the other.
It had pained him, of course it had. He knew that, actually, friendship comes before love.. But he was so blinded by jealousy that he didn’t want to see that. Junsu was supposed to be his, only his.
A sigh drew from his mouth, there was no point in staying here. He would only be more tired the next morning.
He’d see Junsu again.
Slowly he got up again, give Yoochun one last glance before he made way to Yoochun’s bedroom, crawling back under the warm covers. He nuzzled himself in the pillows, sniffling up a sweet, tingling scent.
Probably a mixture of Yoochun and his cologne…
It made him feel drowsy.
And only a few minutes later he fell asleep again
---
“Junsu… we brought you something..”
Junsu’s eyes immediately lit up when he glanced over at Yoochun, Jaejoong and the big dolphin balloon the latter was holding. He squealed in happiness, Junsu had always been associated with a dolphin, because everyone claimed he laughed like a dolphin. Of course, Junsu didn’t mind it at all. “It’s a dolphin!”
Jaejoong beamed him a faint smile. The balloon had been his idea, and luckily, Yoochun didn’t budge to stop him from buying it. He walked to the left side of the bed and took Junsu’s hand, unfolding his fingers so he could lay the thing string in his palm. “I., We thought it would be nice to decorate this place a little…”
When Yoochun heard Jaejoong change the “I” to “We” he looked up in surprise, beaming Jaejoong a surprised gaze. And to his bigger amazement, the latter beamed him a small smile back.
Junsu was far from just happy, he was beyond that.. Even for his condition. He spread his arms out, to Jaejoong and Yoochun a very common gesture. They leaned over to hug Junsu, but when they both felt something wet against their cheeks they pulled back in worry.
“Su.. why’re you crying?”
Junsu sniffled, drying his tears slowly with the sleeve of his gown. “I-I just… I’m just so happy you guys are here, a-and not bickering..”
Jaejoong’s heart clenched, he felt Yoochun fidget slightly as well. All of Junsu’s words just got send straight to their hearts. They remained silent, for both were speechless.
“I-I’ve been thinking of both of you… e-ever since I feel sick.” Junsu continued, his heartbreaking sobs not stopping. “I w-wanted to see you both so badly.., to tell you guys that you’ll always be my best f-friends..”
At this point Jaejoong eyes had filled up with tears as well, and had a hard time hiding it.
“E-Even when I die… I want you to know, n-never forget me.. but, please move on with your lives.” Junsu then took both their hands, then pressed Jaejoong’s palm against Yoochun’s, sandwiching them with his own on either of them. “A-And… please make up… and be there for each other.”
It was hard, hard to say yes. He didn’t know if he ever could look Yoochun in the eyes when, in the end, Junsu would pass away.
Yoochun’s palm was warm against his, making it even worse. Tears spilled from his cheeks. “Junsu please…”
“Hyung.. It’s o-okay to cry..” Junsu said in a soothing, but sad tone. “I’d rather see you cry than…” He stopped, lowering his head as he took a deep breath.
They stayed like that for a while, until a knock on the door helped them out of their gloom. Junsu and Jaejoong quickly dried their eyes while Yoochun drew a deep, shaky breath.
“C-Come in..”
The door swung open lightly and a doctor appeared, his expression warm. “How are you feeling this morning, Junsu?”
“A little better, Yunho-shii.”
Yunho smiled back and then nodded his head to Jaejoong and Yoochun. “You’ve got some friends over I see?”
Junsu nodded, slightly happier than before. “Yes, these are my best friends from high school, Kim Jaejoong Hyung and Park Yoochun Hyung.”
“It’s nice of you to visit Junsu, he couldn’t stop talking about you.” Yunho chuckled softly, tapping his fingers on the frame of the bed. “We kept asking him if we should try to contact you, but Junsu thought he’d only be a burden.”
In surprise Jaejoong turned his head back to Junsu. “Junsu, you’re never a burden, never!”
Yoochun nodded, squeezing Junsu’s hand softly. “Jaejoong’s right, we’re always here for you..”
“I know, I just thought it’d be hard to..” Junsu lowered his head shyly. “I thought you guys wouldn’t come..”
How could he ever think that, Jaejoong thought. Even if Junsu would’ve called him in the middle of the night he’d have been there!
Yunho laughed softly. “Well, let’s just be glad we’re all here now. Junsu-shii, just ring when you need something, alright?”
“Yes Yunho-shii!” Junsu said happily, giving the man a thumbs up. “By the way, Look what they brought me!” He pointed at the dolphin balloon Jaejoong had tied to the frame of his bed.
“A dolphin?” The doctor looked up with a wide grin. “That’s really nice of them.”
“Yes! They always said I laughed like a dolphin, so I was nicknamed like that!”
Jaejoong kept smiling while Junsu explained the doctor about their high school life together, thank god he didn’t mention what happened with him and Yoochun. He felt a lot more calm, but the thought of Junsu passing away still haunting his lower gut.
When he looked around the room a little he caught Yoochun staring at him, he didn’t even took the effort to look away… Instead, he smiled at him, which made Jaejoong smile back automatically.
It had been so long that they’d exchanged gazes like that.
Maybe, this reuniting wasn’t only for the worst…
---
I'm really happy I'm continuing this fic again.. I missed it! I kept it on hiatus because of my friend that passed away in January... I didn't have the inspiration to write about an illness back then... But now, I decided to continue this story, and dedicate it to him. Joppe knew I wanted to become a writer, and I know that he'd never want me to give up my dream!
Joppe, deze is voor jou :)!
Hope you guys like the little turn in the story ;) because the weather's fine I felt like a little sunnier atmosphere!
Author: miduyoh (before: jadexscandal )
Length: Mini series (4/10)
Pairing: JaeSuChun (JaeSu, YooSu, JaeChun)
Rating: R
Themes: Drama, Angst, Tragedy and Romance.
Summary: Even when you want to do everything for the one you love, to perform his last wish, some can’t just bring it up to love someone they hate.
A/N: I know it's been long since I updated this, so here's a brand new chapter :D!
Previous: 00.|| 01.|| 02. || 03.
Chapter 4
It was still raining when Yoochun started the engine of his car. Visitors hour was over and he was heading back to his apartment, with Jaejoong on the passenger’s seat.
He’d fallen asleep as soon as he got into the car. And Yoochun noticed that today he’d been so silent. Now he was snoring softly, his head leaning against the window.
Every now and then Yoochun would slightly turn his head to look at his childhood friend, wondering how everything could’ve end up like this. They used to be best buds, they even called each other soul mates, until that one time when he kissed Junsu right in front of Jaejoong.
Did he regret doing that? Yes and no. Yes because it broke their friendship… and no because he got Junsu’s first kiss. Jaejoong wasn’t the only one who was in love with Junsu, and when Jaejoong told him he had a crush on him he wanted to be faster. He wanted to have Junsu for himself.
But Junsu told him he didn’t like him more than a friend.
It had been taking him some time to get over it, unfortunately, but nothing was the same after that. Junsu grew more silent and Jaejoong just totally ignored him.
The last months of high school were awkward and after they graduated they just took separate paths. The three who used to be best friends for such a long time were gone.
As soon as Yoochun pulled up the drive way and brought his car to a halt he stared down at Jaejoong. He was sleeping so delicately that he didn’t want to wake him up, so he wrapped his arms around him and carried him into his apartment.
The guy needed some well-earned sleep.
---
That night bad dreams took over his mind, Jaejoong sprung up from under the covers, breathing harshly and covered in cold sweat. That dream had seemed so real, the image of Junsu laying in a coffin still clear on his retina. His vision became blurry as he caught himself crying, only soft whimpers and desperate soft leaving his mouth.
His fingers moved up to massage his temples, he needed to calm down.. otherwise he knew for sure he’d go crazy. He couldn’t have that right now, he had to be strong for Junsu, he knew he had to! Then he noticed something, he was lying in a bed..
Was it Yoochun’s bed?
Still sobbing, Jaejoong got up from the bed, wobbling over to the kitchen. The last thing he remembered was walking to the car with Yoochun, nothing else. He must’ve been sleeping ever since. Maybe the lack of food in his stomach made him see those terrible things that freaked him out.
His shaking hand pulled the handle of fridge, the bright light made him squeeze his eyes close. “Damnit..” He muttered under his breath, how he hated to wake up in the middle of the night for food. He should be resting now. In the end he flopped himself down at the dinner table, munching on some random sandwich. Luckily he felt a lot better after the first few bites.
It made him think, think of all those times he, Junsu and Yoochun had spend together. Summers, winters.. All those times he’d enjoyed every bit of their presence. Then why had everything to turn out so differently.
He did blame Yoochun for this, partly. He thought they were friends, best friends.. And when he told Yoochun he was planning to confess to Junsu he’d seemed so supportive, happy even.
But maybe.. Behind that smiled was another expression. Jealousy perhaps?
He never knew what’d happened between those two, he’d been to astonished by that kiss. Junsu’s first kiss, that he’d never asked what happened afterwards.
He sighed, finishing off his sandwich. He felt lonely, the darkness of the night making it even worse. He shivered, maybe he should better go back to bed. But then, If he was sleeping in Yoochun’s bed.. Where would the idiot be? Curiously he started to walk around to, in the end, find the guy sleeping on the couch.
A weird sting squeezed his heart. He tried to ignore it, but without success. He strode closer, his eyes taking in the sight of Yoochun sleeping. His hair was tangled, the blankets shifted so they showed his naked chest. Wouldn’t he get a cold like that?
Wait… Was he worried about Yoochun?! He quickly shook his head, trying to get that thought out, until he stared at his childhood friend again. Maybe, the guy wasn’t so bad as he thought.
Slowly he sat himself down on the only free space on the couch, studying Yoochun closely. Nervously he laid a hand on Yoochun’s thigh. “Where did it all go wrong, Yoochun-ah…” His voice came out soft, his eyes saddening the more he stared at the other.
It had pained him, of course it had. He knew that, actually, friendship comes before love.. But he was so blinded by jealousy that he didn’t want to see that. Junsu was supposed to be his, only his.
A sigh drew from his mouth, there was no point in staying here. He would only be more tired the next morning.
He’d see Junsu again.
Slowly he got up again, give Yoochun one last glance before he made way to Yoochun’s bedroom, crawling back under the warm covers. He nuzzled himself in the pillows, sniffling up a sweet, tingling scent.
Probably a mixture of Yoochun and his cologne…
It made him feel drowsy.
And only a few minutes later he fell asleep again
---
“Junsu… we brought you something..”
Junsu’s eyes immediately lit up when he glanced over at Yoochun, Jaejoong and the big dolphin balloon the latter was holding. He squealed in happiness, Junsu had always been associated with a dolphin, because everyone claimed he laughed like a dolphin. Of course, Junsu didn’t mind it at all. “It’s a dolphin!”
Jaejoong beamed him a faint smile. The balloon had been his idea, and luckily, Yoochun didn’t budge to stop him from buying it. He walked to the left side of the bed and took Junsu’s hand, unfolding his fingers so he could lay the thing string in his palm. “I., We thought it would be nice to decorate this place a little…”
When Yoochun heard Jaejoong change the “I” to “We” he looked up in surprise, beaming Jaejoong a surprised gaze. And to his bigger amazement, the latter beamed him a small smile back.
Junsu was far from just happy, he was beyond that.. Even for his condition. He spread his arms out, to Jaejoong and Yoochun a very common gesture. They leaned over to hug Junsu, but when they both felt something wet against their cheeks they pulled back in worry.
“Su.. why’re you crying?”
Junsu sniffled, drying his tears slowly with the sleeve of his gown. “I-I just… I’m just so happy you guys are here, a-and not bickering..”
Jaejoong’s heart clenched, he felt Yoochun fidget slightly as well. All of Junsu’s words just got send straight to their hearts. They remained silent, for both were speechless.
“I-I’ve been thinking of both of you… e-ever since I feel sick.” Junsu continued, his heartbreaking sobs not stopping. “I w-wanted to see you both so badly.., to tell you guys that you’ll always be my best f-friends..”
At this point Jaejoong eyes had filled up with tears as well, and had a hard time hiding it.
“E-Even when I die… I want you to know, n-never forget me.. but, please move on with your lives.” Junsu then took both their hands, then pressed Jaejoong’s palm against Yoochun’s, sandwiching them with his own on either of them. “A-And… please make up… and be there for each other.”
It was hard, hard to say yes. He didn’t know if he ever could look Yoochun in the eyes when, in the end, Junsu would pass away.
Yoochun’s palm was warm against his, making it even worse. Tears spilled from his cheeks. “Junsu please…”
“Hyung.. It’s o-okay to cry..” Junsu said in a soothing, but sad tone. “I’d rather see you cry than…” He stopped, lowering his head as he took a deep breath.
They stayed like that for a while, until a knock on the door helped them out of their gloom. Junsu and Jaejoong quickly dried their eyes while Yoochun drew a deep, shaky breath.
“C-Come in..”
The door swung open lightly and a doctor appeared, his expression warm. “How are you feeling this morning, Junsu?”
“A little better, Yunho-shii.”
Yunho smiled back and then nodded his head to Jaejoong and Yoochun. “You’ve got some friends over I see?”
Junsu nodded, slightly happier than before. “Yes, these are my best friends from high school, Kim Jaejoong Hyung and Park Yoochun Hyung.”
“It’s nice of you to visit Junsu, he couldn’t stop talking about you.” Yunho chuckled softly, tapping his fingers on the frame of the bed. “We kept asking him if we should try to contact you, but Junsu thought he’d only be a burden.”
In surprise Jaejoong turned his head back to Junsu. “Junsu, you’re never a burden, never!”
Yoochun nodded, squeezing Junsu’s hand softly. “Jaejoong’s right, we’re always here for you..”
“I know, I just thought it’d be hard to..” Junsu lowered his head shyly. “I thought you guys wouldn’t come..”
How could he ever think that, Jaejoong thought. Even if Junsu would’ve called him in the middle of the night he’d have been there!
Yunho laughed softly. “Well, let’s just be glad we’re all here now. Junsu-shii, just ring when you need something, alright?”
“Yes Yunho-shii!” Junsu said happily, giving the man a thumbs up. “By the way, Look what they brought me!” He pointed at the dolphin balloon Jaejoong had tied to the frame of his bed.
“A dolphin?” The doctor looked up with a wide grin. “That’s really nice of them.”
“Yes! They always said I laughed like a dolphin, so I was nicknamed like that!”
Jaejoong kept smiling while Junsu explained the doctor about their high school life together, thank god he didn’t mention what happened with him and Yoochun. He felt a lot more calm, but the thought of Junsu passing away still haunting his lower gut.
When he looked around the room a little he caught Yoochun staring at him, he didn’t even took the effort to look away… Instead, he smiled at him, which made Jaejoong smile back automatically.
It had been so long that they’d exchanged gazes like that.
Maybe, this reuniting wasn’t only for the worst…
---
I'm really happy I'm continuing this fic again.. I missed it! I kept it on hiatus because of my friend that passed away in January... I didn't have the inspiration to write about an illness back then... But now, I decided to continue this story, and dedicate it to him. Joppe knew I wanted to become a writer, and I know that he'd never want me to give up my dream!
Joppe, deze is voor jou :)!
Hope you guys like the little turn in the story ;) because the weather's fine I felt like a little sunnier atmosphere!