(no subject)
god, the blood brothers rule. it's very very odd that i like them. i don't like any other music like this. thursday is the closest to them ;D haha. and they sound nothing like thursday.
for some reason right now i'm freaking out that i'm gonna gain a lot of weight at college. i like to think that i'm not one of those annoying girls who's always like, "god, i'm so fat" when their thighs are like the size of most peoples' arms. (and i'm not, cause, dude, my thighs = bigger than that, heh) and i know that everyone is sick of girls bitching/obsessing over their weight/looks/etc. i try not to talk about it much for that reason. but i do care (too much). not in the, "god, i wish i was skinny, i'm going to stop eating" way. more like that, "god, i wish i was skinny, i'd stop eating but food is too good for that. maybe i should exercise. nah, that's too much work. i'll just sit here and feel sorry for myself" way. heh. and everyone i talk to says how that gaining 15 lbs thing is true. right now, i think i could stand to *lose* 15 pounds. just because my mom told me that you should never be more than 15 pounds over your leanest adult weight. and i am 15 pounds over that. but yeah. i'm paranoid that i'm going to eat really unhealthily because i'll be able to have junk food. my mom doesn't buy it, so i never really have to worry. i wish i could have like. leg liposuction! heh. i know my arms are skinny and my stomach is fine. but, blah. i hate saying this because it's *so* freaking relative. and to lots of people, i'm sure i'm skinny. plus, confidence is a lot hotter than losing an extra five pounds, y'know? but everyone i know who says, "you should love your body, everyone is beautiful" is cute. yeah, it's real hard to do that when you're cute/skinny/whatever. psh. i wish i wasn't so lazy. cause running would be enjoyable if i would just get out and do it. okay, i feel weirdly self-conscious even talking about the fact that i am self-conscious. maybe it's cause i like pretending i'm not like most girls. i "don't care" about my weight, as long as i'm healthy. (partly true, if i looked hot, i wouldn't care how much i weighed). i don't wear makeup because it's against my "principles" (and i'm lazy). i dunno. i think it's one of those "if i try and i fail..what then?" situations. cause hey, if people don't think i'm cute without make up on or my hair done or me in shape, then they might think i'm cute if i do that stuff. (and just for whatever, i only know of one person who has thought i'm hot enough to want to go out with me in the past four years and he's a weirdo with bad taste, so there. heh. and i'm not fishing for compliments, because any pictures i post online are ones that i think don't show the ickiness.) ANYWAY. i'm sick of talking about this and i'm sure (if anyone read it) that you're sick of reading, so let's move on.
here is my cute purse that my mommy bought me and that i love very much:
and here is my arm.
yay, i called nora and she can come to bright eyes with me. so i got the tickets. and i'm leaving on friday after work at 4:30. next friday, though, august first. drahvin' to columbus. maybe we can have sushi before. :D i love sushi. i had it two days in a row over the weekend. sushi fo' lyfe.
for some reason right now i'm freaking out that i'm gonna gain a lot of weight at college. i like to think that i'm not one of those annoying girls who's always like, "god, i'm so fat" when their thighs are like the size of most peoples' arms. (and i'm not, cause, dude, my thighs = bigger than that, heh) and i know that everyone is sick of girls bitching/obsessing over their weight/looks/etc. i try not to talk about it much for that reason. but i do care (too much). not in the, "god, i wish i was skinny, i'm going to stop eating" way. more like that, "god, i wish i was skinny, i'd stop eating but food is too good for that. maybe i should exercise. nah, that's too much work. i'll just sit here and feel sorry for myself" way. heh. and everyone i talk to says how that gaining 15 lbs thing is true. right now, i think i could stand to *lose* 15 pounds. just because my mom told me that you should never be more than 15 pounds over your leanest adult weight. and i am 15 pounds over that. but yeah. i'm paranoid that i'm going to eat really unhealthily because i'll be able to have junk food. my mom doesn't buy it, so i never really have to worry. i wish i could have like. leg liposuction! heh. i know my arms are skinny and my stomach is fine. but, blah. i hate saying this because it's *so* freaking relative. and to lots of people, i'm sure i'm skinny. plus, confidence is a lot hotter than losing an extra five pounds, y'know? but everyone i know who says, "you should love your body, everyone is beautiful" is cute. yeah, it's real hard to do that when you're cute/skinny/whatever. psh. i wish i wasn't so lazy. cause running would be enjoyable if i would just get out and do it. okay, i feel weirdly self-conscious even talking about the fact that i am self-conscious. maybe it's cause i like pretending i'm not like most girls. i "don't care" about my weight, as long as i'm healthy. (partly true, if i looked hot, i wouldn't care how much i weighed). i don't wear makeup because it's against my "principles" (and i'm lazy). i dunno. i think it's one of those "if i try and i fail..what then?" situations. cause hey, if people don't think i'm cute without make up on or my hair done or me in shape, then they might think i'm cute if i do that stuff. (and just for whatever, i only know of one person who has thought i'm hot enough to want to go out with me in the past four years and he's a weirdo with bad taste, so there. heh. and i'm not fishing for compliments, because any pictures i post online are ones that i think don't show the ickiness.) ANYWAY. i'm sick of talking about this and i'm sure (if anyone read it) that you're sick of reading, so let's move on.
here is my cute purse that my mommy bought me and that i love very much:
and here is my arm.
yay, i called nora and she can come to bright eyes with me. so i got the tickets. and i'm leaving on friday after work at 4:30. next friday, though, august first. drahvin' to columbus. maybe we can have sushi before. :D i love sushi. i had it two days in a row over the weekend. sushi fo' lyfe.