my dad
I miss my dad so much.He thinks i am avoiding him. he has pneumonia again, and there might be cancer in two places. i can't cry any more.i just can't get it out.i want to die. it just hurts so much: like my heart is being ripped out of my chest, slowly, string by sinewy string. Im so scared he is just gonna die one night while im asleep, and i won't have told him everything. I feel like i am just watching him die... he's not fighting... maybe he wants to die too. THere's a lump welling up in my throat maybe ill get to cry soon.
It is a wierd day. ONe of the dogs at the barn bit me twice today. he doesn't usually bite. then my horse, who was in the turnout, reared straight up and then bucked like she wanted to protect me from that stupid dog. she never rears and never bucks especially when im not on her back.i hope she loves me.
It is a wierd day. ONe of the dogs at the barn bit me twice today. he doesn't usually bite. then my horse, who was in the turnout, reared straight up and then bucked like she wanted to protect me from that stupid dog. she never rears and never bucks especially when im not on her back.i hope she loves me.