(no subject)
it seems trust and any loyalties whatsoever have completely left the world . Ive somehow had the least and the most happen to me recently than maybe ever in my life. I expect these disappointments now, I am not surprised but what is it supposed to mean? Is it truly as simply put as what I had said, now my life is devoid of these things, these supposed loyalties, and trusts which were misplaced? People who were once prominent in my life, now purposefully ignore me for reasons beyond my comprehension. It couldnt be a coincidence that it began at the exact point in which my vehicle was incapacitated. Its since then grown steadily worse, from the small to the large. People tell me something is happening, people tell me to expect a call. But these things never happen, these calls never come..why? Why all at once as well? Whether its people choosing not to reply to a message, email, voicemail or instant, choosing to ignore their caller ID, never making a promised call, sleeping through a limited time frame, sleeping through something I wanted to show them, never repaying debts, outright lying to me and I wont even joke about people thinking of anything but themselves, or ever going out of their way to show any true interest and take any initiative other than the superficial. Where is the honor, I must truley have made extremely flawed judgments in people in accepting them even if in some subtle fashion into my life. My conclusion is my judgment can no longer be trusted and must always be put to question and scrutinized. It is as I once said a world where friendship and loyalty goes as far as what you are being used for. Maybe I will finally learn my lesson one of these times, dependibility is null, words mean nothing, people are nothing...they will drag you down into that nothing.