Meh..
I really don't know what else to post here, but yeah. It's almost been three weeks since I had to put Soya down, and I noticed something last night. All the snow over where I buried her is matted down, because Eclipse, the pup, is going out there and laying on it. I saw here today when I went out to gather her and Juna, and she's got this mopey depresso look on her muzzle. I went over, sat down with her and she put her head on my leg and I petted her, almost cried. Both me and Eclipse miss the old grumpy dog. It's amazing really, Eclipse only knew her for a few months, but they bonded, alot, even though Soya was just a big grump towards her.
Just hurts, every time I think about my old thing, *sigh* I really wish there was something else I coulda done, but this area of mine, so shitty, so terrible. If it'd been later in the day, I'd have taken her to the vet, see if they could patch her up, make her well again, but at such a time of night, mmmff.
It'll take me a long damn time to be comfortable with myself, and the decisions I made that day, cause every time I walk outside my mind instantly makes me look over there, or when I walk out to the front room, STILL expecting to see Soya laying on the couch, or over on the bed in the corner.
Goddammit, why is is to hard to let her go. :(
Just hurts, every time I think about my old thing, *sigh* I really wish there was something else I coulda done, but this area of mine, so shitty, so terrible. If it'd been later in the day, I'd have taken her to the vet, see if they could patch her up, make her well again, but at such a time of night, mmmff.
It'll take me a long damn time to be comfortable with myself, and the decisions I made that day, cause every time I walk outside my mind instantly makes me look over there, or when I walk out to the front room, STILL expecting to see Soya laying on the couch, or over on the bed in the corner.
Goddammit, why is is to hard to let her go. :(