Everything Happens For a Reason, Chapter 17
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Chapter 17: Acceptance
He didn’t expect to come out from the shower finding Moonbin lying on his bed and sucking on his thumb. He instinctively ran to him to check what had gone wrong in the short span of time he was in the shower.
“Hey Baby boy, what you’re doing in here? I thought Chun-ahjussi was coming to play with you? And he said you were cooking breakfast with Noona.” He sat by the bed as he stroked the boy’s hair.
Moonbin didn’t reply to him but kept sucking on his thumb. It’s strange cause he hadn’t done that since he started drinking from his sippy cup. The Jungs told the little boy that he’s growing up, and grown up don’t suck on their thumbs - he could look at his Appa.
Jaejoong tried to pry the finger out of his mouth, “You can’t talk to me if you keep sucking on it.”
Surprisingly, Moonbin was being stubborn, he shook his hand out of Jaejoong’s grasp and returned it into where it was. His mouth. Jaejoong tried another tactic.
“Oh, so you don’t want to grow up like me? You wanna stay being a baby?”
This time the boy shook his head and closed his eyes, pretending to sleep. A sign that whatever made him come in Jaejoong’s bedroom, the man had to find out himself. So he got up from the bed, “Fine, I’ll ask Noona. Let me put on some clothes and I’ll leave you in here by yourself. I’m going to eat breakfast by myself then.”
As he walked to his closet, he could see from the corner of his eyes that the child was peeping and watching his every move while pretending he’s still sleeping. Jaejoong pretended he didn’t know.
After putting up a pair of jeans and a sweater, he approached the lump on his bed, trying to get him out of the room. “Look, aren’t you sick of sleeping already? Let’s have breakfast with me… ok, baby boy…” he started to tickle the child’s tummy who squirmed in delight, laughing along with him while trying to bury himself under the cover.
5 minutes later, Jaejoong had a 3 year old who hid his face on his chest, holding him so tight that he’s almost strangled by those little hands. The boy also refused to be put down on the floor once they were out of the bedroom. It only took him 5 seconds to find his answer standing next to Changmin in the living room, back against his view. It looked like they were arguing in whisper. Yoochun was watching them, seated on the sofa and JiHye also had her back on him, shoulder tensed.
Changmin noticed him and gave him a nod as the other man turned around to face him. Jung Yunho.
The first thing that came out of his mouth was, “JiHye, I guess breakfast can wait. Prepare some hot tea for us, will you… no sugar.”
JiHye rushed to the kitchen. Changmin and Yunho seated themselves in the 3 seater. In the end he opted to sit next to Yoochun with the Octopus boy on his lap.
* * * * *
Yunho’s heart clenched watching his Son holding Jaejoong so tightly. When Changmin entered the before him, Moonbin was running to him in a wide smile. But once he saw his father behind, Yunho couldn’t help but felt hurt seeing the look of horror on the boy’s face as he skidded in a halt and running back, disappeared into Jaejoong’s bedroom. Had he really frightened him?
They were all seated in the cramped living room and he felt out of place in the middle of people who were supposed to be his family. Well, other than Yoochun whom seated next to Jaejoong - his ex-lover. It wasn’t a pretty sight for him, seeing them sitting so close to each other with his son hanging on Jaejoong like a baby Octopus. But what hurt most was that he refused to look at him though they haven’t met for a few days. No matter how occupied his mind with Min Young, he still missed his firstborn terribly. He really wanted to hold him that close.
“Binnie, come here baby. Appa misses you so much. Don’t you miss Appa?” He tried to talk to him as he moved to squat beside Jaejoong’s sofa.
The boy turned his head and held the man even tighter that he made a strangled sound, “Binnie, I can’t breathe. Stop hiding your face and look at your Appa.”
“…”
“Binnie, Appa is sorry. Appa is not mad at you anymore, it was not your mistake. Will you give me a hug and forgive me? Please baby?” Yunho persuaded and peered closer to Jaejoong’s side, trying to get a glimpse of his son’s face.
He must’ve gotten too close that he felt Jaejoong slid a little to Yoochun’s side with an uncomfortable expression.
Still no sign of any movement from Moonbin and he sighed in defeat and returned to his seat.
It was Changmin who made an effort to comfort him, “Give him some time Hyung, he’ll come around.”
But Jaejoong just shot him without mercy, “And I thought the doctor had requested to see you first before you’re even supposed to see Moonbin.” He looked at Changmin, “You didn’t tell him?”
“I was supposed to come with Appa, Hyung. I didn’t get the cha-“
“Why would I need someone else’s permission to see my own son?” Yunho cut him off.
“Hyung, that’s not it! He just wanted to inform you with Binnie’s condition. You’re his father after all, you need to know.” The younger one tried to explain once again.
“What’s the difference?! I know I haven’t spent much time with him but I tried to be a good father for him. I didn’t mean to get angry at him last week but you all knew the situation back then, I was panicked!”
Jaejoong looked at him with an icy stare as he stood up and walked towards JiHye who was standing by the kitchen counter.
“Baby boy, why don’t you play at the park with Noona, hhm? Jejussi needs to talk to Appa for a bit.”
Moonbin didn’t say anything but didn’t protest also when Jaejoong handed him to his aunt.
“Hold on, you haven’t eaten your breakfast and it’s cold outside. Let me pack you some food and hot drinks.”
As he busied himself in the kitchen, JiHye walked into Moonbin’s bedroom to get the boy’s winter jacket.
Yunho was watching everything in awe, he never saw Jaejoong like this before. So… domestic? He always took care of him like a mother hen too, but it was all different seeing him acting like that to a child. It’s almost like… what a mother would do. And it touched him deep inside, he longed to have that Jaejoong around him. With him. With his children.
Jaejoong’s voice once again broke his train of thoughts as the other man rushed his sister and son. He told Changmin as they were walking to the door, “Min, make sure he wore his socks and sneakers though he hated it, and not the Velcro sandal. I don’t want him freezing his toes. And JiHye, if it gets too cold go to the country club and play inside. I’ll ring you once we’re done here.” He kissed Moonbin’s cheek and the top of his head.
Changmin eagerly got up and did what he was told as he was sending his wife and nephew out the door while Jaejoong seated himself back to Yoochun’s side, much to Yunho’s dismay.
Jaejoong crossed his hand in front of his chest and asked said nothing but pursed his lips into a thin line.
Yunho felt defensive already without any words being spoken. Whatever they’re going to discuss, he knew it was going to be a tough one.
* * * * *
Jaejoong looked straight at Yunho who seemed bothered by something other than his son’s being. He kept glancing at him through his long eyelashes, a scowl was written clearly on the line of his face. It almost like a war was going to break until he felt Yoochun’s arm around his shoulder.
He exhaled, not realizing that he’d been holding his breath watching the man sitting across him looking like he was ready to get into a battle. Jaejoong came to his senses, this was not how it was supposed to be. They should have a discussion, not an argument. And a discussion could happen only when both parties are in a peaceful state of mind. Right now, both of them are tensed.
So he chose to break the silence with this one question that no one had provided him with, “Yunho, how is Min Young now?”
Yunho seemed a little taken aback with the unexpected question. But his face grew darker, “Not good. She’s still in NICU and… all about her’s just- doesn’t look good.”
Jaejoong knew it was not easy for him to answer his question. But he’s sincerely concern about the baby too.
“Did the doctor say anything about her progress? If… she’s getting better?”
The tired father closed his eyes, “The doctor still couldn’t answer that. She couldn’t even handle her milk that- that- that they had to… get whatever she needs through the drips. God, she’s just a baby!” he palmed his face, trying to prevent tears from falling and Jaejoong didn’t know whether to go on with the conversation anymore.
“I wish the best for her. I’ll see her at the hospital tomorrow. I promise. Maybe I’ll bring Moonbin along.” He finally brought the boy’s name into the conversation.
Yunho looked up to him, “I want to bring my son home with me today.”
All’s Jaejoong concern and sympathy towards Min Young flew out the window. Yunho really didn’t make it easy for him at all.
“Yunho, you saw for yourself that he was afraid of you. And dr. Kim Junsu clearly told us that he wanted to see you first before you made contact with him.” He tried to sound patient.
“I don’t care what this Junsu doctor said! Moonbin is coming back with me.” He persisted.
“No. I won’t let him. Not until you meet dr. Kim.” Jaejoong didn’t budge as well.
“Jaejoong, Moonbin is my son. As a father, I just want to be together with my family. It’s hard for me to care 100% for Min Young while wondering about my son’s whereabout!” His tone raised by each word. But Jaejoong still tried to keep his cool.
“No one deny the fact that he’s your son. But you’ve been staying at the hospital non-stop, I know you’re also worried about him but how would you care for him too? By letting your parents and sister watching over him? Would that suffice for you?”
“Jae, he’s also my responsibility!”
“And yet you haven’t showed me that you’ve done a good job at keeping your responsibilities intact!” They’re yelling at each other now.
“Look, I don’t want to start an argument with you… but let me take my son back home with me. You have no right to keep him with you!” Yunho stood up from his seat, Changmin was startled and did the same.
And suddenly all 4 adults were all on their feet.
“I am not keeping him from you, goddamnit! You saw for yourself that he didn’t even want to look at you! He’s afraid of you! Can’t you understand that!” His breathing got heavy as emotion poured out with his speech.
“All I asked was for you to meet dr. Kim first then we’ll work it out from there. It’s no use to bring him home just to be left again by you to the hospital every single day!”
“Look, I know him since birth, he’s just scared that I’ll get mad at him again. The last time wasn’t intended, you were there!! You saw what’s happening! Once we spend time together again he’ll get over it, we’ll be okay once again!”
“You still don’t get it don’t you! It’s not about you and him! It’s about are you going to make an effort to get close to him again and give him the same amount of attention that you’re giving Min Young!”
“My goodness Jaejoong, my daughter is sick! She’s dying! What you expect me to do? Sit around and do nothing and just- just watch her slipping away from me?”
“Yunho, I didn’t tell you to do that either. But there’s nothing more that you can do but pray for her! We all pray for her!! You’re not a doctor, you cannot save her!! But Moonbin is aware of your presence, he was there with you before Min Young came along cause your wife had been neglecting him all the time! And now you’re doing the same thing to him!” He yelled so hard at him and didn’t realize that they’re standing only one feet away from each other.
Yunho didn’t say anything for a few seconds, but his next words really make Jaejoong’s blood boiled in rage.
“So now you’re playing mother to my Son? Is that it?”
Yoochun and Changmin didn’t even have the chance to step forward as Jaejoong lunged at Yunho and punched him hard on the jaw. They both fell on the carpeted floor, Jaejoong on top of Yunho; and he didn’t seem to be satisfied with that one punch.
Just as he was ready to beat the hell out of him, he felt Yoochun’s hand holding him back. “Jaejoong stop it! Don’t!”
He tried to break free from Yoochun’s hold while Changmin was trying to separate their bodies and get Yunho to stand up.
“He deserved it! Let go of me!”
“No! Jaejoong calm down! Don’t let him get to you, you both need to talk as adults, not children!” Yoochun held both of his arms on his back.
He stood still, but his stance was still offensive.
“Hyung, you went too far!! My goodness, I never thought that you’d ever say something like that.” Changmin shook his head as he was holding Yunho’s hands on his too.
Yoochun took over the situation with an authoritative tone. “Now both you sit down and behave! This had gone overboard. And Yunho, I expect you to act more civilized with your mouth. Jaejoong, I… I really never thought that you… hell, just- don’t punch anyone anymore. Now sit! Both of you!”
Jaejoong sat down right away, Yunho was still standing and rubbing his jaw. He wouldn’t even be surprised if it cracked. But he didn’t like the way Yoochun took over the situation. So he questioned him.
“And why are you here? You’re not even part of the family.” Changmin shook his head in disbelief as he could sense jealousy in his brother in law’s voice.
Those words almost made Jaejoong jump from his seat once again - most probably to give another punch to Yunho but Yoochun kept him steady on the sofa.
“I’m not, but you’re both are my employees and you were making a ruckus inside my employee’s house which happen to be at MY AGENCY’S DORM.” He punctuated the last words with firmness.
“And just in case you forgot, for the few times your son was staying over, I also helped taking care of him. That’s including last week after his birthday party. Jaejoong also told me everything that the doctor told or advised him. So stop telling me that I have no right to say anything in this! I care about him as much as you both do, though maybe you didn’t think so!”
Jaejoong was a bit surprised with what Yoochun said. He knew that his lover had been nice to Moonbin but he thought that was all because him; that he was just tolerating. Never once it crossed his mind that he was probably really care. He felt a lot better just hearing the truth from his tone.
“Now let’s behave and start over again.”
Changmin puffed his cheeks as he inhaled. He was so relieved that finally someone could do something. He was so out of it. So he went to the fridge to get some ice to compress Yunho’s jaw. It’s started to swell.
“Now, Yunho. Before we continue this discussion, please keep in mind that we’re all having good intentions here. We are all concern in your baby’s condition as well as your son. Physically, your baby girl needs constant care. I’m really sorry that she hasn’t gotten any better but we are all hope that she will. We are all praying for her. But mentally, your son also felt left behind. He used to be your only baby, but now he didn’t even see you much in the little spare time that you had outside working and caring for Min Young. And then the birthday incident happen. Changmin, since I only heard most of it from Jae, maybe you could tell him what the doctor said about Moonbin?” Yoochun asked the youngest in the room.
Changmin nodded, “Hyung, he’s been depressed all this time but he was trying his best to not show it because he knew that Min Young is important for you too. He needed your attention and he wanted to bond with Min Young but you’re always kept him away. Did you even realize that he never spent any time alone with her without you telling him to stop poking her or tire her out? Apparently he felt that you didn’t love him like you did. He was neglected by Soon Mi-noona before, you didn’t even let him bid her goodbye. But then his father was doing the same thing though you didn’t intend to.”
Changmin was afraid that his brother in law would object, but he still didn’t say anything. So he braved himself to continue, “dr. Kim Junsu told me that he needed to see you not to judge you as a father, but to talk to him heart to heart. He needed to hear your side of the story before he could help to make Moonbin understand. He’s just 3 years old, his words are limited, so he needed to find the perfect words to mend the relationship between you two. That’s all.”
Yunho still kept his gazed down.
Yoochun started again, “And Jaejoong. I also didn’t know your reason, but I guess we all deserve to know what’s behind your… excessive attention to Yunho’s son. You didn’t even know him until last year. But I don’t deny that it surprised me to see you so attached to him. And maybe the Jungs also thought the same. Care to share your 2 cents?”
Jaejoong realized that most of the question was actually what Yoochun always wanted to ask him but he didn’t want to. Or perhaps just didn’t have the right time to.
He took a deep breath before he started. “First, I’m sorry for the punch but I don’t regret it.” Yoochun raised his eyebrow. “ I meant it.” He glanced at his lover.
“I didn’t mean to get attached to your son in the first place. In the beginning, I just thought that he’s a lovely kid, he didn’t ask much and didn’t whine for things he couldn’t get. But when I know that deep inside he’s an old soul waiting for somebody to understand him deeper than just a boy; I couldn’t help to want to dig further to the core of his problem and save him.”
Now Yunho looked up at him… “Save… him? From what?”
“Yunho, you knew about my past. I’m sure Yoochun and Changmin knew as well. I was broken apart when I received the news about my parents disappearance. It was all like a dream to me. Even now I kept hoping that maybe one day they’d show up and looked for me. Or someone found the remains of their bones, so I could have something to hold on too.” He shifted to get a more comfortable position on his sit.
“ But as time flew… there were so many things that didn’t meet my expectation. There were so many things that made me sad and lost hope, even in despair like I couldn’t go on living. But I have some good memories of the time I spent with my parents when I was young. I kept remembering all the good things that they told me, all the stories of tragedy and luck from around the world; and all the lessons of life learned from their journey. And that made me happy again, made me able to stand on my feet. Having those memories and strength they left behind.”
“Moonbin was happy having you as his father when his mother neglected him. He has a pair of grandparent who cared so much from him. But they’re not you. You are his father, the one who held him close when he was crying from hunger from the neglect of his mother. You were the one who bathed him first and taught him 1 2 3. You were the one who kissed him goodnight on his crib when his mother didn’t even hear his cry in the middle of the night. But that moment was short.”
His tears started to fall. “The moment Min Young was born, you pushed him to grow up too soon. You asked him to be understanding without him understood how it was? He only knew that his sister was sick and she’s more important than him for you. He may never complained… he tried to understand… but what would he be in the next 15 years? Who knows that you’re going to live forever? Who knows that JiHye and Changmin will always be around for him? Who knows how long your parents will still be healthy and strong enough to care for him? By then… what good memories can he remember? But a sick sister and a father who always put him last in priority. Then what will make him strong? You won’t make him happy until you realize that you have 2 children that needs you much just the same. While one is physically ill, another is dying inside.” He let his emotion poured out from his eyes as he sobbed in Yoochun’s arms.
“I want him to remember a father who taught him the value of life and the importance of taking care of each other as a family. That’s why I can’t send him back to you knowing that you don’t even realize what kind of future you are shaping for him today!”
Yoochun rubbed his back in soothing motion as Changmin just sit there speechless.
In just a minute after Jaejoong finished his words Yunho fell on his knees. Changmin thought he fainted because of fatigue but then they all could hear he was wailing. Jung Yunho was wailing and crying and bawling that Changmin just held his shoulder to let him know what he’s not alone.
And they could hear the words that he should’ve said long time ago to his son… “Binnie, forgive me! Forgive Appa, my son!”
The other 3 adults breathe a breath of relieve… another chain was broken. And a father was freed from his guilt and ego. Jaejoong kept crying in Yoochun’s arms, but this time a cry of happiness, that Yunho finally understood. They all understood.
* * * * *
It’s already past lunchtime, JiHye taken Moonbin to lunch at the nearest family restaurant. The kid was whiny, he wanted to go home but she wasn’t sure that they should since there hadn’t been any news from Jaejoong.
Then her husband called him with just one word, “Come back with Moonbin.”
When they returned, she could see that they all had red eyes and their faces were puffy. Whatever they were talking about JiHye knew it was a good thing. Cause then his brother approached them to kiss his son the top of his, caressed he cheeks and told him, “Appa loves you so much Binnie. Appa will pick you up with Min Young when she’s better.” Then he left.
Jaejoong didn’t take him out. He was sitting in the kitchen counter with Yoochun. But she knew that everything is alright. She hoped that it would be a new beginning for his brother.
* * * * *
Chapter 18
As always, comments please! :D And thank you for following this fic until now... I hope this chapter is a satisfactory to you. Have a great weekend!