sick of this
these past few weeks i havent been talking to anybody about whats going on in my life, been in hermit mode for the most part, and not being talkative since lots of things were on my mind lately..
ive been getting a lot of lectures from parents and relatives.. all because im sick and tired of my job and i want out of this whole mess. My parents dont seems to understand the hardship i go thru everyday.. yet they keep saying this job has a good future, and im wasting it all away by quitting. Everyday i slave myself to work, 10 or sometimes 12 hours a day, 6 days a week.. and i wait for that one off day so i can recharge myself.. and the cycle continues all over again.
Im not even gonna go on about the promotion scheme they have going on in the company, its absolutely IMPOSSIBLE to go onto the next level unless i put in 7-10 years in the company.. its been 2 years in this place, and i already feel ive been in a prison for the longest time. I seriously cant put up with it for another year.. this isnt what i want to do for the rest of my life, and i decided to move on.
as for moving on, im still in decision phrase as to what i want to do.. but i do know one thing, i need to work on my people skills and relations a lot better. I need to get in touch with more new people, and get more connections from them. I also want to go back to studying, afterall, education credentials are important.
one thing im absolutely sick of hearing is how i look and my appearance.. that i have brown long hair and i dress unlike any other typical people, people wont accept and judge me because i look like some punk. WELL FUCK. everytime i hear this fucking lecture i just grow fucking mad. my hair and my appearance is ME. and im not going to change my appearance for anything unless i feel the need to. why is it that fucking society pick on those who look slighty different and must call them an outsider? narrow-minded fucks. My parents and relatives all mind me of how i look, they just dont say it. Are they going to like me better if i look like a fucking steve ukrel? im absolutely sick of this shit, i just want to tear everything apart and stop these fucking lectures.. words cant describe how irritated i am right now. I WONT CHANGE BECAUSE SOCIETY DEMANDS ME TO.
im not happy, and my parents are giving me a lot of invisible pressure by telling me to change, and telling me to reconsider this job. Just now i came back from my uncle(since he invited me for dinner) and he gave me the EXACT SAME FUCKING LECTURE again.. and then when i came home just now i received a package from my parents with letters with the EXACT SAME SHIT LECTURE.. I GET THE FUCKING POINT. DOES IT MAKE EVERYONE FEEL BETTER IF I FUCKING SHAVE MY HEAD AND BE ALL ONE OF THE SAME TYPICAL HONGER!? ONLY THEN I WILL BE HAPPY WITH MY LIFE AND LIVE FUCKING HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
Im sorry to everyone who reads this.. but i just cant hold it in myself any longer, i fear if i dont write this out sooner depression will strike.. ive been meaning to look for a new job, and at the same time, looking for things to study so i can move on with my life..
ive been getting a lot of lectures from parents and relatives.. all because im sick and tired of my job and i want out of this whole mess. My parents dont seems to understand the hardship i go thru everyday.. yet they keep saying this job has a good future, and im wasting it all away by quitting. Everyday i slave myself to work, 10 or sometimes 12 hours a day, 6 days a week.. and i wait for that one off day so i can recharge myself.. and the cycle continues all over again.
Im not even gonna go on about the promotion scheme they have going on in the company, its absolutely IMPOSSIBLE to go onto the next level unless i put in 7-10 years in the company.. its been 2 years in this place, and i already feel ive been in a prison for the longest time. I seriously cant put up with it for another year.. this isnt what i want to do for the rest of my life, and i decided to move on.
as for moving on, im still in decision phrase as to what i want to do.. but i do know one thing, i need to work on my people skills and relations a lot better. I need to get in touch with more new people, and get more connections from them. I also want to go back to studying, afterall, education credentials are important.
one thing im absolutely sick of hearing is how i look and my appearance.. that i have brown long hair and i dress unlike any other typical people, people wont accept and judge me because i look like some punk. WELL FUCK. everytime i hear this fucking lecture i just grow fucking mad. my hair and my appearance is ME. and im not going to change my appearance for anything unless i feel the need to. why is it that fucking society pick on those who look slighty different and must call them an outsider? narrow-minded fucks. My parents and relatives all mind me of how i look, they just dont say it. Are they going to like me better if i look like a fucking steve ukrel? im absolutely sick of this shit, i just want to tear everything apart and stop these fucking lectures.. words cant describe how irritated i am right now. I WONT CHANGE BECAUSE SOCIETY DEMANDS ME TO.
im not happy, and my parents are giving me a lot of invisible pressure by telling me to change, and telling me to reconsider this job. Just now i came back from my uncle(since he invited me for dinner) and he gave me the EXACT SAME FUCKING LECTURE again.. and then when i came home just now i received a package from my parents with letters with the EXACT SAME SHIT LECTURE.. I GET THE FUCKING POINT. DOES IT MAKE EVERYONE FEEL BETTER IF I FUCKING SHAVE MY HEAD AND BE ALL ONE OF THE SAME TYPICAL HONGER!? ONLY THEN I WILL BE HAPPY WITH MY LIFE AND LIVE FUCKING HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
Im sorry to everyone who reads this.. but i just cant hold it in myself any longer, i fear if i dont write this out sooner depression will strike.. ive been meaning to look for a new job, and at the same time, looking for things to study so i can move on with my life..