Family and plans for tonight
Everyone in my family is fighting a lot with everyone else. It centers around the constant fights between my brother and my sister-in-law. Everyone is stressed. Then, my brother and my mother tell me about their problems. I really appreciate that they are able to share their feelings with me, especially my brother because he didn’t use to do that earlier. But, all that sharing leaves me not only worried and concerned for them, but also feeling guilty. I feel like if they are going through all that than how do I have the right to have anything good in my life. I also feel like they are going to get mad at me for having a life that doesn’t revolve around them. I know I shouldn’t be feeling like this, but I just can’t help it.
I have something planned with her tonight. And I know that I really need that right now and I had been planning to go to this thing for a long while now and I still really want to go. But, I am scared of messing everything up by getting emotional tonight. Well, let’s see what happens. After posting this, I will try really hard to push all my family stuff out of my head and think ONLY about her and our plans for tonight. I'll go outside too because sitting at home can't be good for you when you are feeling down. I think writing this post really helped me too. Well, wish me luck for tonight…