BURN IN HELL, FUCKING HIPPIES !!!!
WHAT THE FUCK !?!?!
SO I JUST GOT A FUCKING TICKET FROM A BIKE COP DRIVING THE 0.7 MILES FROM MY SISTER'S HOUSE TO MINE.
0.7 MILES.
O.7 MILES!
AND THREE BLOCKS OF THAT IS A FUCKING SCHOOL ZONE WHERE I CANNOT DRIVE OVER 15 MPH!
0.7 MILES !!!!
GO THE FUCK TO HELL! WHO THE FUCK CARES IF I DON'T WEAR A DAMN SEAT BELT FOR 0.7 MILES IN A RESIDENTIAL AREA? WHO THE FUCK CARES IF I DON'T WEAR A SEAT BELT ON THE INTERSTATE, FOR THAT MATTER?
WHEN DO THE HEADLINES IN THE NEWS EVER FUCKING READ, "MAN NOT WEARING SEAT BELT BECOMES HUMAN PROJECTILE IN COLLISION, KILLS FAMILY OF FOUR WHO WERE ALL WEARING THEIR SEAT BELTS" !?!?!
THE TRUTH IS NOT WEARING A SEAT BELT NEVER HURTS ANYONE BESIDES THE DUMB @$$ (in this case, myself) WHO CHOSES NOT TO DO SO!
CLICK IT OR TICKET?
HOW ABOOT "CLICK IT OR DON'T, WE REALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK AS LONG AS YOU GIVE US YOUR MONEY"?
BECAUSE ISN'T THAT REALLY WHAT THIS ISH IS ABOOT? THAT THE 30% OF MY INCOME AS A SINGLE CHILDLESS MALE THAT YOU TAX OFF OF ME ISN'T ENOUGH AND YOU HAVE TO SUCK WHAT LITTLE EXPENDABLE INCOME I MAY LUCK INTO OUT OF MY WALLET? YOU VAMPIRIC @$$ HOLES!
IT'S NOT ENOUGH THAT I'M FINANCIALLY PUNISHED FOR BEING ALONE AND WITHOUT PROGENY, BUT I MUST ALSO SUFFER FURTHER EXPENSE AND INDIGNITY FOR NOT GUARDING AGAINST AN ACT THAT WOULD END IT ALL AND PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY?
AND BEFORE YOU TRY AND GET ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY ON ME AND SAY I BROUGHT IT ON MYSELF, I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW I AM NOT ANTI-ESTABLISHMENT.
I GET TICKETS ALL THE TIME!
I!
AM!
A!
HORRIBLE!
DRIVER!
SPEEDING! RUNNING RED LIGHTS! DRIVING WITHOUT FUNCTIONING TAIL LIGHTS!
I AM THE WORST DRIVER ON THE FUCKING PLANET! AND I PAY ALL OF THOSE TICKETS! I GO TO TRAFFIC SCHOOL! I JUST SENT OUT A PAYMENT FOR MY LAST ONE ON FRIDAY DAMMIT!
BUT ALL OF THOSE WERE REAL INFRACTIONS! I PUT OTHERS IN DANGER DUE TO MY ERROR IN JUDGEMENT! I CAN DEAL WITH THAT!
WHAT I CANNOT DEAL WITH IS THE MOTHER FUCKING STATE OF CALIFORNIA SAYING THAT IT'S FOR MY OWN GOOD AND THAT THE SEAT BELT LAW IS IN PLACE TO PROTECT ME!
PROTECT ME ?!?!
PROTECT ME FROM WHAT? MY $250 DOLLARS ?!
OH, THANK YOU, CALIFORNIA FOR SAVING ME FROM TWO DAYS WAGES! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I EVER WOULD HAVE DONE IF YOU WEREN'T HERE TO RESCUE ME FROM MY OWN BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEAR-EARNED MONEY!
GIVE IT UP, YOU BEAUREAUCRATIC BUTT LICKING BASTARDS! THIS IS BY NO MEANS ALTRUISTIC! DON'T COME AT ME LIKE YOU'RE DOING THIS FOR MY OWN GOOD! AT LEAST SHOOT STRAIGHT AND SAY YOU NEED A NEW COFFEE MAKER IN THE BREAK ROOM, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU'LL BE ALLOCATING MY MONEY FOR!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A FUCKING STATE WHERE I CAN ERRANTLY DIE BY MY OWN STUPID ACTIONS - OR LACK THEREOF - AND NOT BE FINED FOR IT!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE IF I DON'T TAKE A LUNCH, I WON'T BE WRITTEN UP AT MY JOB SINCE THEY'RE SO AFRAID OF BEING SUED AGAIN BY LAZY BITCHES THAT WORK THE SYSTEM AND TWIST THE LAW TO THEIR ADVANTAGE!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE MY GOVERNOR WAS NOT THE LEAD IN "JINGLE ALL THE WAY"! (AND WHERE ONE CAN PROPERLY PRONOUNCE WORDS THAT END IN "-ER"!)
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE POLICE ARE MORE CONCERNED WITH STOPPING REAL CRIME (LIKE THE STABBING DOUBLE HOMICIDE IN MY APARTMENTS TWO YEARS AGO) INSTEAD OF WHO DOESN'T WEAR A SEAT BELT FOR FIVE BLOCKS.
THIS IS WHY THE FUCK I VOTE! I'M MOVING TO ALASKA! SARAH PALIN IS MY V-PILF !!!
SO I JUST GOT A FUCKING TICKET FROM A BIKE COP DRIVING THE 0.7 MILES FROM MY SISTER'S HOUSE TO MINE.
0.7 MILES.
O.7 MILES!
AND THREE BLOCKS OF THAT IS A FUCKING SCHOOL ZONE WHERE I CANNOT DRIVE OVER 15 MPH!
0.7 MILES !!!!
GO THE FUCK TO HELL! WHO THE FUCK CARES IF I DON'T WEAR A DAMN SEAT BELT FOR 0.7 MILES IN A RESIDENTIAL AREA? WHO THE FUCK CARES IF I DON'T WEAR A SEAT BELT ON THE INTERSTATE, FOR THAT MATTER?
WHEN DO THE HEADLINES IN THE NEWS EVER FUCKING READ, "MAN NOT WEARING SEAT BELT BECOMES HUMAN PROJECTILE IN COLLISION, KILLS FAMILY OF FOUR WHO WERE ALL WEARING THEIR SEAT BELTS" !?!?!
THE TRUTH IS NOT WEARING A SEAT BELT NEVER HURTS ANYONE BESIDES THE DUMB @$$ (in this case, myself) WHO CHOSES NOT TO DO SO!
CLICK IT OR TICKET?
HOW ABOOT "CLICK IT OR DON'T, WE REALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK AS LONG AS YOU GIVE US YOUR MONEY"?
BECAUSE ISN'T THAT REALLY WHAT THIS ISH IS ABOOT? THAT THE 30% OF MY INCOME AS A SINGLE CHILDLESS MALE THAT YOU TAX OFF OF ME ISN'T ENOUGH AND YOU HAVE TO SUCK WHAT LITTLE EXPENDABLE INCOME I MAY LUCK INTO OUT OF MY WALLET? YOU VAMPIRIC @$$ HOLES!
IT'S NOT ENOUGH THAT I'M FINANCIALLY PUNISHED FOR BEING ALONE AND WITHOUT PROGENY, BUT I MUST ALSO SUFFER FURTHER EXPENSE AND INDIGNITY FOR NOT GUARDING AGAINST AN ACT THAT WOULD END IT ALL AND PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY?
AND BEFORE YOU TRY AND GET ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY ON ME AND SAY I BROUGHT IT ON MYSELF, I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW I AM NOT ANTI-ESTABLISHMENT.
I GET TICKETS ALL THE TIME!
I!
AM!
A!
HORRIBLE!
DRIVER!
SPEEDING! RUNNING RED LIGHTS! DRIVING WITHOUT FUNCTIONING TAIL LIGHTS!
I AM THE WORST DRIVER ON THE FUCKING PLANET! AND I PAY ALL OF THOSE TICKETS! I GO TO TRAFFIC SCHOOL! I JUST SENT OUT A PAYMENT FOR MY LAST ONE ON FRIDAY DAMMIT!
BUT ALL OF THOSE WERE REAL INFRACTIONS! I PUT OTHERS IN DANGER DUE TO MY ERROR IN JUDGEMENT! I CAN DEAL WITH THAT!
WHAT I CANNOT DEAL WITH IS THE MOTHER FUCKING STATE OF CALIFORNIA SAYING THAT IT'S FOR MY OWN GOOD AND THAT THE SEAT BELT LAW IS IN PLACE TO PROTECT ME!
PROTECT ME ?!?!
PROTECT ME FROM WHAT? MY $250 DOLLARS ?!
OH, THANK YOU, CALIFORNIA FOR SAVING ME FROM TWO DAYS WAGES! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I EVER WOULD HAVE DONE IF YOU WEREN'T HERE TO RESCUE ME FROM MY OWN BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEAR-EARNED MONEY!
GIVE IT UP, YOU BEAUREAUCRATIC BUTT LICKING BASTARDS! THIS IS BY NO MEANS ALTRUISTIC! DON'T COME AT ME LIKE YOU'RE DOING THIS FOR MY OWN GOOD! AT LEAST SHOOT STRAIGHT AND SAY YOU NEED A NEW COFFEE MAKER IN THE BREAK ROOM, OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU'LL BE ALLOCATING MY MONEY FOR!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A FUCKING STATE WHERE I CAN ERRANTLY DIE BY MY OWN STUPID ACTIONS - OR LACK THEREOF - AND NOT BE FINED FOR IT!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE IF I DON'T TAKE A LUNCH, I WON'T BE WRITTEN UP AT MY JOB SINCE THEY'RE SO AFRAID OF BEING SUED AGAIN BY LAZY BITCHES THAT WORK THE SYSTEM AND TWIST THE LAW TO THEIR ADVANTAGE!
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE MY GOVERNOR WAS NOT THE LEAD IN "JINGLE ALL THE WAY"! (AND WHERE ONE CAN PROPERLY PRONOUNCE WORDS THAT END IN "-ER"!)
I WANT TO LIVE IN A STATE WHERE POLICE ARE MORE CONCERNED WITH STOPPING REAL CRIME (LIKE THE STABBING DOUBLE HOMICIDE IN MY APARTMENTS TWO YEARS AGO) INSTEAD OF WHO DOESN'T WEAR A SEAT BELT FOR FIVE BLOCKS.
THIS IS WHY THE FUCK I VOTE! I'M MOVING TO ALASKA! SARAH PALIN IS MY V-PILF !!!