Photoshop Phriday of the picspam kind.
I was going to try to explain this with my words.
Then I just decided to raid a chat log instead.
I in no way take responsibility for any disturbances in the force caused by this post.
Preview:
Okay, these photoshops and more require something in the way of explanation. Their leaps of logic would shame an Olympic hurdler.
I was watching TNG. I was also on the computer. I decided to discuss one through the medium of the other.
Zizi Foth Si says:
wesley looks like such a butch girl it's untrue.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Maybe he IS. Maybe he's a girl being raised as a boy by his insane mother.
Maybe that's the hidden depth of the character.
Zizi Foth Si says:
...he is SO MUCH MORE INTERESTING as a lesbian.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Then for the rest of the series he shall be a girl.
Zizi Foth Si says:
In trek crack universe he is.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
But of course. Everyone still hates him, though.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Heh heh heh. I just clicked on the first google image link I found, and it said "Looking back, a teenage Wil was the closest thing one could get to a baby butch and still have a penis. "
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Truths uniwersal and constant.
Zizi Foth Si says:
http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/memoryalpha/en/images/thumb/8/8b/Wesley_Crusher_2365.jpg/292px-Wesley_Crusher_2365.jpg COME ON. HE IS A GIRL.
and not even in the chekov "d'aww he's all cute like a girl" kind of way - in the actual THAT IS A CROSSDRESSER kind of way.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Wow.
That's...he makes quite a pretty girl.
Zizi Foth Si says:
I KNOW RIGHT
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
I think I'm going to pretend he's really a crosdressing girl from now on.
It makes him bearable.
Zizi Foth Si says:
It actually does.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Apart from when his voice breaks...that may be a problematic area.
Zizi Foth Si says:
He sounds like a girl lowering her voice.
........I actually see him as a girl now. For trues. It's a bit weird.
(...)
Zizi Foth Si says:
As a girl wesley is actually an interesting character. This is creepy.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
See, it's enriched the viewing experience.
Zizi Foth Si says:
YOU GO GIRLWESLEY
............weslinda. I know that's not a name but it should be.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
IT IS NOW.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Though if wesley's a girl this scene comes off kinda rapey.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Rapey how?
Zizi Foth Si says:
"hold him steady"
Worf and Riker chase weslinda through pipes into a tiny space, grab her, drag her back to the deck where they all pin her down and make her experience 'the game'.
SEE?
"okay wesley, it won't hurt"
"NO!"
"you'll like it!"
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
I...see. But that makes it more dramatic! Wait, do they KNOW she's a girl in this delusional universe? Or is it a seeecret?
ALSO EW CREEPY.
Zizi Foth Si says:
and then they make him/her play the orgasmic game.
"Just let yourself go...relaaaaax"
But now it are data to the rescue!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
HURRAH!
Zizi Foth Si says:
He's such a dude.
Hrm. Do they know if weslinda's a girl or not...
Maybe Dr. Crusher is hiding his/her identity.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
For the purposes of...nefarious psychological experiment? I mean, her name is DR.CRUSHER.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Truth.
or it could be all "you look like your father BE YOUR FATHER."
Also d'aww wesley's at starfleet.
I mean weslinda.
Weslinda's kissing a girl!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
YAY PRETEND LESBIANISM!
Also the idea that Dr.C would make her daughter LOOK LIKE HER DEAD HUSBAND is so creepy it must be used.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Especially as it was whilst under Picard's command that wesley's father was killed. So it's all POIGNANT REMINDER for picard. And that is why they have fancy tea together.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Perfect!
Zizi Foth Si says:
oh, and to make it more creepy - picard kinda sorta has a thing with crusher. And the crushers and picard were all vaguely BFFs, I gather. So one can imagine crusher/crusher/picard action back in the day. Which adds an extra level to the creepy.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Gurn.
Zizi Foth Si says:
"Have I ever told you how much you look like your father, wesley?"
OH PICARD
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
IT'S CANON IN A REALLY WRONG WAY.
Multiple layers of wrong.
Zizi Foth Si says:
the best kind!
(...)
Zizi Foth Si says:
Picard to Worf: "I want to have you surgically altered."
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Er...
Zizi Foth Si says:
I know. It just gets better. And/or worse.
.......worf would be a TERRIBLE girl.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
OH GOD DON'T MAKE ME THINK ABOUT THAT.
Zizi Foth Si says:
PLAITING HER HAIR AND SKIPPING DOWN THE CORRIDORS
ALL SIX FOOT TWO OF HER
Girldata would be, like, ridiculous. Basically a japanese sex droid.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
SINGING AND ARRANGING FLOWERS. Also yes he would be. And that would be horrific.
Zizi Foth Si says:
man troi would walk around wearing teeny tiny speedos and nothing more.
Girl riker would STILL HAVE THE FUCKING BEARD
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
HELL YES SHE WOULD. AND NO PERSONALITY.
Zizi Foth Si says:
girl geordi would be EXACTLY THE SAME but with more breasts.
And girl picard. She would be all matronly and authoritative. And man crusher (heh. Mancrusher.) would be....I have no idea.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
The same, but with no breasts. I mean, EXACTLY the same.
With makeup and everything.
Zizi Foth Si says:
weslinda would be a really feminine boy with long flowing hair and a stuffed bra. He would walk with a saucy wiggle.
And you know it.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Oh, I do. I do.
Why is boy-girl-boy Welsinda becoming the TNG Chekov in my mind?
Zizi Foth Si says:
because he/she/he is young and molestable?
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
True that. And not intolerable since he became a her.
Zizi Foth Si says:
.......................................biologicallyfemale!weslinda/chekov.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Hmmmmmmmm...
Zizi Foth Si says:
orrr biologicallymalesaucywiggle!weslinda/chekov.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
D'awww. Baby deer sex. Adorable.
Zizi Foth Si says:
great, now I'm thinking of actual baby deers.
NO.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO I DID NOT MEAN THAT.
Zizi Foth Si says:
WITH THE HEADS OF CHEKOV AND WESLINDA
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO
NO NO NO.
NO.
Zizi Foth Si says:
BLEATING
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO!
Zizi Foth Si says:
NOT ABLE TO MAKE HUMAN SOUNDS
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
GRSAAAAAAAAARGH
Zizi Foth Si says:
JUST DEER NOISES
FROM HUMAN FACES
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
THIS IS WORSE THAN HORSE NOISES
NO
NO
NO
Zizi Foth Si says:
GROWING ANTLERS FROM THEIR FOREHEADS AND RUNNING INTO EACHOTHER
WITH UTTERLY BLANK HUMAN FACES
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
I'm going to have nightmares about that now.
If words scare you and you just want to jump to the pictures, feel welcome to do so!
Everyone (lazy) loves the cutout filter!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
YOU ARE MAD WITH POWER.
Is it wrong that they looks kind of sweet as horrific deerbeasts?
Zizi Foth Si says:
Chekov looks too aware. I must find a photo where he is dead behind the eyes. This is not an issue with wesley.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
He is a husk of a human being, as we know.
Now for lovingly hand-drawn pictures which took me HOURS.
(this is a lie.)
HE WOULD LIKE TO BE YOUR SPECIAL FRIEND NOW
Lovely.
And now for a holiday picture from Slovenia. Of an erect cock.
One in six men in Iowa has had sex with a chicken.
Then I just decided to raid a chat log instead.
I in no way take responsibility for any disturbances in the force caused by this post.
Preview:
Okay, these photoshops and more require something in the way of explanation. Their leaps of logic would shame an Olympic hurdler.
I was watching TNG. I was also on the computer. I decided to discuss one through the medium of the other.
Zizi Foth Si says:
wesley looks like such a butch girl it's untrue.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Maybe he IS. Maybe he's a girl being raised as a boy by his insane mother.
Maybe that's the hidden depth of the character.
Zizi Foth Si says:
...he is SO MUCH MORE INTERESTING as a lesbian.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Then for the rest of the series he shall be a girl.
Zizi Foth Si says:
In trek crack universe he is.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
But of course. Everyone still hates him, though.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Heh heh heh. I just clicked on the first google image link I found, and it said "Looking back, a teenage Wil was the closest thing one could get to a baby butch and still have a penis. "
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Truths uniwersal and constant.
Zizi Foth Si says:
http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/memoryalpha/en/images/thumb/8/8b/Wesley_Crusher_2365.jpg/292px-Wesley_Crusher_2365.jpg COME ON. HE IS A GIRL.
and not even in the chekov "d'aww he's all cute like a girl" kind of way - in the actual THAT IS A CROSSDRESSER kind of way.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Wow.
That's...he makes quite a pretty girl.
Zizi Foth Si says:
I KNOW RIGHT
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
I think I'm going to pretend he's really a crosdressing girl from now on.
It makes him bearable.
Zizi Foth Si says:
It actually does.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Apart from when his voice breaks...that may be a problematic area.
Zizi Foth Si says:
He sounds like a girl lowering her voice.
........I actually see him as a girl now. For trues. It's a bit weird.
(...)
Zizi Foth Si says:
As a girl wesley is actually an interesting character. This is creepy.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
See, it's enriched the viewing experience.
Zizi Foth Si says:
YOU GO GIRLWESLEY
............weslinda. I know that's not a name but it should be.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
IT IS NOW.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Though if wesley's a girl this scene comes off kinda rapey.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Rapey how?
Zizi Foth Si says:
"hold him steady"
Worf and Riker chase weslinda through pipes into a tiny space, grab her, drag her back to the deck where they all pin her down and make her experience 'the game'.
SEE?
"okay wesley, it won't hurt"
"NO!"
"you'll like it!"
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
I...see. But that makes it more dramatic! Wait, do they KNOW she's a girl in this delusional universe? Or is it a seeecret?
ALSO EW CREEPY.
Zizi Foth Si says:
and then they make him/her play the orgasmic game.
"Just let yourself go...relaaaaax"
But now it are data to the rescue!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
HURRAH!
Zizi Foth Si says:
He's such a dude.
Hrm. Do they know if weslinda's a girl or not...
Maybe Dr. Crusher is hiding his/her identity.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
For the purposes of...nefarious psychological experiment? I mean, her name is DR.CRUSHER.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Truth.
or it could be all "you look like your father BE YOUR FATHER."
Also d'aww wesley's at starfleet.
I mean weslinda.
Weslinda's kissing a girl!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
YAY PRETEND LESBIANISM!
Also the idea that Dr.C would make her daughter LOOK LIKE HER DEAD HUSBAND is so creepy it must be used.
Zizi Foth Si says:
Especially as it was whilst under Picard's command that wesley's father was killed. So it's all POIGNANT REMINDER for picard. And that is why they have fancy tea together.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Perfect!
Zizi Foth Si says:
oh, and to make it more creepy - picard kinda sorta has a thing with crusher. And the crushers and picard were all vaguely BFFs, I gather. So one can imagine crusher/crusher/picard action back in the day. Which adds an extra level to the creepy.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Gurn.
Zizi Foth Si says:
"Have I ever told you how much you look like your father, wesley?"
OH PICARD
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
IT'S CANON IN A REALLY WRONG WAY.
Multiple layers of wrong.
Zizi Foth Si says:
the best kind!
(...)
Zizi Foth Si says:
Picard to Worf: "I want to have you surgically altered."
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Er...
Zizi Foth Si says:
I know. It just gets better. And/or worse.
.......worf would be a TERRIBLE girl.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
OH GOD DON'T MAKE ME THINK ABOUT THAT.
Zizi Foth Si says:
PLAITING HER HAIR AND SKIPPING DOWN THE CORRIDORS
ALL SIX FOOT TWO OF HER
Girldata would be, like, ridiculous. Basically a japanese sex droid.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
SINGING AND ARRANGING FLOWERS. Also yes he would be. And that would be horrific.
Zizi Foth Si says:
man troi would walk around wearing teeny tiny speedos and nothing more.
Girl riker would STILL HAVE THE FUCKING BEARD
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
HELL YES SHE WOULD. AND NO PERSONALITY.
Zizi Foth Si says:
girl geordi would be EXACTLY THE SAME but with more breasts.
And girl picard. She would be all matronly and authoritative. And man crusher (heh. Mancrusher.) would be....I have no idea.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
The same, but with no breasts. I mean, EXACTLY the same.
With makeup and everything.
Zizi Foth Si says:
weslinda would be a really feminine boy with long flowing hair and a stuffed bra. He would walk with a saucy wiggle.
And you know it.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Oh, I do. I do.
Why is boy-girl-boy Welsinda becoming the TNG Chekov in my mind?
Zizi Foth Si says:
because he/she/he is young and molestable?
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
True that. And not intolerable since he became a her.
Zizi Foth Si says:
.......................................biologicallyfemale!weslinda/chekov.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
Hmmmmmmmm...
Zizi Foth Si says:
orrr biologicallymalesaucywiggle!weslinda/chekov.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
D'awww. Baby deer sex. Adorable.
Zizi Foth Si says:
great, now I'm thinking of actual baby deers.
NO.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO I DID NOT MEAN THAT.
Zizi Foth Si says:
WITH THE HEADS OF CHEKOV AND WESLINDA
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO
NO NO NO.
NO.
Zizi Foth Si says:
BLEATING
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
NO!
Zizi Foth Si says:
NOT ABLE TO MAKE HUMAN SOUNDS
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
GRSAAAAAAAAARGH
Zizi Foth Si says:
JUST DEER NOISES
FROM HUMAN FACES
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
THIS IS WORSE THAN HORSE NOISES
NO
NO
NO
Zizi Foth Si says:
GROWING ANTLERS FROM THEIR FOREHEADS AND RUNNING INTO EACHOTHER
WITH UTTERLY BLANK HUMAN FACES
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
I'm going to have nightmares about that now.
If words scare you and you just want to jump to the pictures, feel welcome to do so!
Everyone (lazy) loves the cutout filter!
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
YOU ARE MAD WITH POWER.
Is it wrong that they looks kind of sweet as horrific deerbeasts?
Zizi Foth Si says:
Chekov looks too aware. I must find a photo where he is dead behind the eyes. This is not an issue with wesley.
It's lonely in space for Scotty says:
He is a husk of a human being, as we know.
Now for lovingly hand-drawn pictures which took me HOURS.
(this is a lie.)
HE WOULD LIKE TO BE YOUR SPECIAL FRIEND NOW
Lovely.
And now for a holiday picture from Slovenia. Of an erect cock.
One in six men in Iowa has had sex with a chicken.